1. I'm relaxed, I have fine 4b(c) hair and my fav leave in is BBD Stretch Growth Creme. I ALWAYS use this after EVERY wash if my hair is going to be rollerset or ironed out. It's heat activated so it must be used with some kind of heat. (Doesen't work well with airdrying) It leaves my hair so shiny and soft it's RIDICULOUS. A friend of mine, (a stylist) used this on my hair once and I bought some the next day and have been hooked ever since. A little goes a long way, I've had the jar for 3 months and It's not even a quarter of the way gone. I just can't say enough about this product. The downside is that it's really expensive ($50 a jar) and it can be hard to find. I got mine off ebay.
2. If i'm airdrying, then my fav leave in is Lacio Lacio. The shine I get from this product is AMAZING, because my hair doesen't naturally have a shine to it. If for some reason I couldn't use the Stretch, then this would be my go-to leave-in conditioner.
2. Also in 2nd place is Rusk Smoother. I just tried this and I can say I really, really liked how my hair felt afterwards. I airdryed my hair with just that in and my hair was really soft, shiny and silky.
3. And third would be Paul Mitchell The Conditioner. I use this if i'm wearing a tight curly rollerset, because it is soo moisturizing. I also use it as a daily moisturizer on my nape and edges. Love it! It works really well when I bun my hair, I use it to dampen my ends. I usually use coconut oil on top of this to counteract some of the moisture and strengthen my hair. The Conditioner+Coconut Oil= Soft, strong shiny moisturized hair!