My LHCF Letter to the Tyra Show... I NEED EDITS!

poookie

Well-Known Member
I am sorry but you guys are very discouraging. I was looking for support and suggestions. Not all the criticism. I can keep LHCF out of the light but what can I do to make the letter appealing. That was the point of the this thread. You guys have changed it to why you think the world will not except this. :ohwell: :perplexed

if it makes any sort of difference, i think that writing to the show would be a great idea! tyra's show isn't nearly as um... well it's not on the same level as Oprah, so there's a greater chance that the show's topic might actually air.
(if that makes sense)

however, i do agree with a lot of the ladies on here, and believe that it wouldn't be such a good idea to include this website on here
maybe... black hair media.com? hehehe..just kidding! i can imagine tons of random people joining the site and putting all kinds of degrading negative comments. and there's no doubt in my mind that someone who didn't want to pay would have a field day in all of our fotki's (like mine) that don't have passwords...


and i think contacting macherie over at healthy textures would be a great idea... that would boost her rollersetting thing, plus i don't see how a ton of publicity over there would be nearly as damaging as it would be here on LHCF.

what a great way to let black women know, on a national level, that it is possible for us to have long healthy hair!
 

Vshanell

FKA Pokahontas
I'm sorry but I don't want LHCF featured on the Tyra Show. And I'm sure I'm not the only person here on this board that feels that way. :look: This site is like a safe haven for many people. Especially since we post pictures and discuss personal matters. And if you put it on the Tyra Show this site is going to become utter chaos. We just saw that earlier this week with somebody coming to the board and discovering they knew somebody here in real life. It just turned into a total circus at that person's expense and was not fair. :nono: Everybody is not ready to absorb all the resources and information on this site. They're not in the right frame of mind yet. I think you should still write into the show because I think this is a topic that needs to be done but I don't think you should put the site in there.

I agree. If the whole world came running to this board I would be out so fast! This is definitely a safe haven to me and I just don't want to deal with masses of people coming here.
 

lisana

New Member
prettyfandANB, I think it's a wonderful letter. Everyone doesn't agree or understand but that's ok. You are a forward thinker and are trying to do something great and everyone can't go along on the ride in situations like these. I really think it would be a great idea for a show but I do think a show like Tyra would take the idea and GHETTO it up as much as possible. However, I think you should send it anyway because you have to start SOMEWHERE even if that means you take the risk of dealing with unsavory elements to the show business world. The people in this world who make things happen always face criticism, naysayers, opinions, whatever, but they keep going because they see the bigger picture. So good luck to you and kudos to you for writing such a great letter.
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
I am feeling better.

Thank you for your thoughts. I know what I have to do now. I will act like LHCF doesnt exist. But I would like the women who view the show to get a hint and start doing their research.
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
That would be awesome actually. And thousands of LHCF members can come from the depths and act like we dont know each other. :grin:

The Tyra Show producers can put a casting call out. A request for black women with long hair to join the show.
 

glamazon386

Well-Known Member
The Tyra Show producers can put a casting call out. A request for black women with long hair to join the show.

That's cute. :yep: They just have to make sure they represent different textures. We don't need good hair vs bad hair hashed out on Tyra's show.
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
:clapping::goodone::grouphug:

Thank you. Tyra aint all that. As a matter a fact, I never watch her show. I just happened to tune in that day and I was so offended. I dont expect Oprah to run with it but it I can get it in a face of the media, I can start running with it. Thank you for understanding me.


prettyfandANB, I think it's a wonderful letter. Everyone doesn't agree or understand but that's ok. You are a forward thinker and are trying to do something great and everyone can't go along on the ride in situations like these. I really think it would be a great idea for a show but I do think a show like Tyra would take the idea and GHETTO it up as much as possible. However, I think you should send it anyway because you have to start SOMEWHERE even if that means you take the risk of dealing with unsavory elements to the show business world. The people in this world who make things happen always face criticism, naysayers, opinions, whatever, but they keep going because they see the bigger picture. So good luck to you and kudos to you for writing such a great letter.
 

fluffylocks

New Member
prettyfandANB, I think it's a wonderful letter. Everyone doesn't agree or understand but that's ok. You are a forward thinker and are trying to do something great and everyone can't go along on the ride in situations like these. I really think it would be a great idea for a show but I do think a show like Tyra would take the idea and GHETTO it up as much as possible. However, I think you should send it anyway because you have to start SOMEWHERE even if that means you take the risk of dealing with unsavory elements to the show business world. The people in this world who make things happen always face criticism, naysayers, opinions, whatever, but they keep going because they see the bigger picture. So good luck to you and kudos to you for writing such a great letter.


Thats true, and its probally really safe to assume they wouldnt have a whole show about LHCF, this would probally just be a small portion of the show if they did one about black hair.

Anyway, on LHCF i've learned you never get a direct answer to your question, people get all political, technical, argumentive ect. If you ask "Why is the sky blue" someone will say "You cant assume its blue" "im colorblind, so i dont agree its blue" "technically its bluish-green" "Why does it matter, we all have the same sky" :rolleyes:
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
:lachen::lachen::lachen:

Thats true, and its probally really safe to assume they wouldnt have a whole show about LHCF, this would probally just be a small portion of the show if they did one about black hair.

Anyway, on LHCF i've learned you never get a direct answer to your question, people get all political, technical, argumentive ect. If you ask "Why is the sky blue" someone will say "You cant assume its blue" "im colorblind, so i dont agree its blue" "technically its bluish-green" "Why does it matter, we all have the same sky" :rolleyes:
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
So I am assuming NO ONE looked at the updated letter?

Geez, I took the time and took LHCF out of the letter and I am still getting suggestions to keep it out. IT IS OUT! IT DOES NOT EXIST! So what about the rest of the letter?:look:
 

guudhair

Well-Known Member
The Tyra Show producers can put a casting call out. A request for black women with long hair to join the show.

I agree...you can also include a list of ladies from LHCF that will be interested in going on the show...Tyra (or Oprah) will still have their own people looking anyway...but you would have given them a start...Tyra and Oprah may have close friends and/or relatives with great lenghts also who may want to share their secrets too...

Either way...great letter!
 

Priss Pot

Makeup + Bench Pressing
I love your energy. Thank you for support.

No problem! While I do agree with some ladies about not putting the LHCF name in the mix, I do understand your intentions with the letter and think that you should still send it, sans the LHCF name.

It would be great to show Tyra that Black women can achieve healthy, beautiful hair whether it be relaxed, natural, texturized, or texlaxed.

The only thing would be that everyone who comes from here would have to go on there and act like they don't know each other....you know, so it won't seem so suspicious :lol:.
 
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guudhair

Well-Known Member
:clapping::goodone::grouphug:

Thank you. Tyra aint all that. As a matter a fact, I never watch her show. I just happened to tune in that day and I was so offended. I dont expect Oprah to run with it but it I can get it in a face of the media, I can start running with it. Thank you for understanding me.

I think you should send it to Tyra and Oprah just in case one is not able (or willing) to cast it for whatever reason...you never know, Oprah may be interested.
 

lisana

New Member
I like the idea of emphasizing black women of all shades and hair types, It's important for everyone to know that ALL black women including dark skinned woman with 4b hair natural or relaxed can grow their hair long. I think this latest version of your letter sounds great. Maybe you can make a list of what you would like to see on the show for better clarification. For instance you could include in the letter "A show about the practice and techniques of Black women with hair APL and longer could include:"

1. a gallery of 7-10 women of all shades and hair types with APL or longer
2. A section with each woman giving a 30 sec intro about her hair history
3. An open forum with the women explaining the misconceptions, surprise, disbelief from others about their long hair
4. A segment on how all black women can achieve long, healthy length through the use of proven methods like, stretching, low heat, bunning, etc. (video clips could be shown of these women at home doing their hair, etc.
5. A segment on fact vs myth that would dispel the myths that you have to be "mixed" or you have to have your hair bone straight or you have to put monkey spit whale sperm on your hair to make it grow.

6. Finally, a segment on the "new" revolution in black hair care. There are so many hair boards showing women achieving the dream hair they have always wanted. No, you don't have to mention this site, but some sites, blogs, message boards would LOVE to share their names with a show like this and it's great to get the word out and let other black women know there is a large community of women who are waiting ot share their knowledge.

etc, etc. I like the idea of laying it out like this because I really don't think the Tyras (or the Oprahs) of the world really know these things and breaking it down like this could really help. :)
 
To the OP: This is an excellent idea and letter...BRAVO! :grin:..now stop editing it and get to sending it, LOL!.


That is a very important point I would HOPE they get, I am not looking to see a casting full of Halle Berry's, not being offensive just truthful. I am hoping they cast from the darkest dark to the lightest light...feel me?

I like the idea of emphasizing black women of all shades and hair types, It's important for everyone to know that ALL black women including dark skinned woman with 4b hair natural or relaxed can grow their hair long. I think this latest version of your letter sounds great. Maybe you can make a list of what you would like to see on the show for better clarification. For instance you could include in the letter "A show about the practice and techniques of Black women with hair APL and longer could include:"

1. a gallery of 7-10 women of all shades and hair types with APL or longer
2. A section with each woman giving a 30 sec intro about her hair history
3. An open forum with the women explaining the misconceptions, surprise, disbelief from others about their long hair
4. A segment on how all black women can achieve long, healthy length through the use of proven methods like, stretching, low heat, bunning, etc. (video clips could be shown of these women at home doing their hair, etc.
5. A segment on fact vs myth that would dispel the myths that you have to be "mixed" or you have to have your hair bone straight or you have to put monkey spit whale sperm on your hair to make it grow.

6. Finally, a segment on the "new" revolution in black hair care. There are so many hair boards showing women achieving the dream hair they have always wanted. No, you don't have to mention this site, but some sites, blogs, message boards would LOVE to share their names with a show like this and it's great to get the word out and let other black women know there is a large community of women who are waiting ot share their knowledge.

etc, etc. I like the idea of laying it out like this because I really don't think the Tyras (or the Oprahs) of the world really know these things and breaking it down like this could really help. :)
 

tatje

New Member
If you could add a P.S : could you not try to evolve every topic of every show to your modeling days and make every show about you? Thanks.

I'm just playing. :drunk:

I'll write a different letter to her for that.
 

fluffylocks

New Member
If you could add a P.S : could you not try to evolve every topic of every show to your modeling days and make every show about you? Thanks.

I'm just playing. :drunk:

I'll write a different letter to her for that.


:lachen::lachen::lachen:


Anyway i love the letter, i didnt notice any errors either. If you do add anything else i also like the idea about darkerskinned women & that myth that you can only grow your hair if your mixed or lightskin with the "good hair"
 

Mizani_Mrs

Well-Known Member
Pretty, you wrote a great letter. Lisana has some great suggestions and facts. My suggestion would be to add more facts as well. the letter is really empty unless you back it up with facts. I can give you suggestions based on what I would like Tyra to talk about. I would do a bulletpoint list and list facts something to the effect of: Most cosmotology classes do not delve into how to care for black hair, but only detail how to cut/style black hair. Most women have been taught by their mother who may have had unhealthy styling habits. Most stylists do not even know how to 'care' for black hair. Majority of black actresses wear weaves because even the most successful stylists do not understand black hair. blah blah blah...and these are the key secrets to caring for black hair ***then give examples of good routines/products, and bad routines/products*** Then i would love to hear Tyra do a short section on good hair ingredients that we should look for, as well as the bad. For instance, they should look for water as the first ingredient in their moisturizer. they should choose a mild poo with sls. they should look for a silk protein in the moisturizer so the protein wont weigh their hair down. they should stretch and try to go 2mos without a touchup. Always use a heat protectant. they should only use heat sparingly. they should deep condition. Dont double-process. THEY SHOULD ONLY RELAX THE NEWGROWTH, NOT THE ENTIRE LENGTH. they should stay away from Petroleum/mineral oil... dispell the myth that trimming the hair makes it grow.etc etc. And what I would really LOVE for her to talk about how black hair products is not necessarily best. sometimes they are loaded with cheap/inferior ingredients and marketed to us. I think this fact would help out alot of black women because i used to always buy black poducts and they were loaded with petrolateum and my hair did not thrive. Then maybe this will expose these compannies and challenge them to make better/healthier products. Also she can touch on how we need to be knowledgeable and know what to ask for and quit letting these stylists have power to jack up our hair. If she wants drama, she can walk thru a BSS and talk about how some of them put bootleg products in bottles, so we need to be careful and buy from reputable sources. She can even dig into how all Asian BSS owners stick together and Asian suppliers will rarely work with any BSS not owned by an asian. These are the things that come to my mind when i think about what i've learned here at LHCF....possibilities are endless!!!!


I like the idea of emphasizing black women of all shades and hair types, It's important for everyone to know that ALL black women including dark skinned woman with 4b hair natural or relaxed can grow their hair long. I think this latest version of your letter sounds great. Maybe you can make a list of what you would like to see on the show for better clarification. For instance you could include in the letter "A show about the practice and techniques of Black women with hair APL and longer could include:"

1. a gallery of 7-10 women of all shades and hair types with APL or longer
2. A section with each woman giving a 30 sec intro about her hair history
3. An open forum with the women explaining the misconceptions, surprise, disbelief from others about their long hair
4. A segment on how all black women can achieve long, healthy length through the use of proven methods like, stretching, low heat, bunning, etc. (video clips could be shown of these women at home doing their hair, etc.
5. A segment on fact vs myth that would dispel the myths that you have to be "mixed" or you have to have your hair bone straight or you have to put monkey spit whale sperm on your hair to make it grow.

6. Finally, a segment on the "new" revolution in black hair care. There are so many hair boards showing women achieving the dream hair they have always wanted. No, you don't have to mention this site, but some sites, blogs, message boards would LOVE to share their names with a show like this and it's great to get the word out and let other black women know there is a large community of women who are waiting ot share their knowledge.

etc, etc. I like the idea of laying it out like this because I really don't think the Tyras (or the Oprahs) of the world really know these things and breaking it down like this could really help. :)
 
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Mizani_Mrs

Well-Known Member
TOO FUNNY, but true...

If you could add a P.S : could you not try to evolve every topic of every show to your modeling days and make every show about you? Thanks.

I'm just playing. :drunk:

I'll write a different letter to her for that.
 

GloriousPraise

Well-Known Member
A woman’s hair is her crowning glory. It adds to her beauty and sexuality. Yet Black Women are plagued with an ever present insecurity of their crowning glory, their hair. We have been lead to believe that we have “bad” hair. We have been lead to believe that our hair can not grow and that our hair can only achieve beautiful, great lengths with hair extensions. We have been lead to believe this lie from society, our mothers, our ancestors, other cultures, the media, our stylist and we have even convinced ourselves of this lie.

I think your letter is very good and drives home your point! I do have a few suggestions for edits. However, I wasn't sure how you wanted to receive them (post them here or send to you privately). I'm still fairly new here and wasn't sure of the protocol.:ohwell:
 

silverlotus

Well-Known Member
A woman’s hair is her crowning glory. It adds to her beauty and sexuality. Yet Black Women are plagued with an ever present insecurity of their crowning glory, their hair. We have been led to believe that we have “bad” hair. We have been led to believe that our hair can not grow and that our hair can only achieve beautiful, great lengths with hair extensions. We have been led to believe this lie from society, our mothers, our ancestors, other cultures, the media, our stylists, and we have even convinced ourselves of this lie.

After seeing the Tyra Show episode about men of different races perceptions of women of different races, I was completely offended. Only one of the men found the black women desirable enough to marry. None of the men found the black women desirable enough to fantasize about. The Asian guy stated that he does not like the hair of the black women, but they have their behinds to offer as a beautiful and desirable feature. I was completely offended and I could only imagine how insecure and hurt the black women in the audience felt. I can only imagine that they left the studio feeling undesirable and unwanted.

I would like to propose a show about Black Women with Very Long Hair. I personally know hundreds of Black Women with long hair around the world. They are busting the myth and helping other women to do it as well. Black and mixed ethnicity women are growing their hair to long lengths at rates never imagined before by the African American community. We have been sabotaged long enough by damaging hair practices passed to us by the hair industry, our hair stylists, and even our unknowledgeable family members.

I believe a Black Hair Care Expert and several long haired black women can come on the show and share tips, techniques, and the steps that have attributed to their growth retention. All of the women will have bra strap length to tail bone length hair. They will present proof that they have normal African American hair and it is long, healthy, and real. It’s about Black Women learning that they are not so different and their hair is normal. It’s about Black Women feeling beautiful, desirable, and sexy while having fun with growing their hair like never before. Black Women do grow their hair. Black Women are sexy. Black Women are desirable. Black Women’s hair is unique, and it is capable of being just as beautiful, thick, strong, healthy, and shiny as any other race or culture. Whether relaxed, “textlaxed," or natural, our hair is beautiful and the most versatile of any race.

I believe Tyra, being a Black Women who I am sure has challenges with her hair, would love to know about black hair care and have some guests come and share their tips, stories and testimonials on the show. Tyra has laid the foundation for presenting Black Women as desirable. I believe it's time to add to the image Tyra has created and present this to the world.


Is this a little better?

Understand, I AM NOT looking for whether you agree with the letter. I am looking for support and edits to the letter. That is it. If you do not support it then please do not post. Thank You!

I made a few minor grammar/punctuation corrections.

I think it's a good letter. As you still keeping the part about you knowing hundreds of long-haired black women?
 
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Ganjababy

Well-Known Member
I agree 100% that you should send this letter. Your enthusiasm shines through and I agree with everything you said. I also think that you should not mention LHCF. There are a lot of haters out there, one example is someone saying on another website that a lot of the ladies on LHCF wear wigs and pass it off as their own hair. If people are really serious about taking care of their hair and believe that they can grow their hair long they will find LHCF. We don't want the non-believers saturating the site with negativity. Do send the letter. Other than what is already pointed out, it is a well written letter.
 

aloof one

New Member
That is some BS.

I don't want Tyra Banks viewers to know about my kitchen, my bad hair days, my stories in the Off Topic Forum, or see my avatar or my siggy or my link to my Fotki. Some people just get online because they see links and want to heckle folks. I don't want to be humiliated at the expense of someone wanting to get attention from a silly daytime show. I love Tyra, to an extent, but lets be serious, there are better ways out there than airying the members' dirty laundry. This was supposed to be a haven and here you go making it into a joke.

Next thing you know my fotki has 1,000 hits and a stalker who saw a post of mine on the Tyra show trying to talk sh!t to me about my hair or date me like they do on Myspace...

Why do you have to publicize something that doesn't need it? If people want healthier hair and are really devoted they will find the site or a book or ask around, JUST. LIKE. I. DID.
 

aloof one

New Member
I also wanted to say that my previous post was a reaction to the idea of telling Tyra to publicize the site LHCF, not the letter, sorry about the confusion.

I dont care about the letter, thats cool and all...

I would just prefer that Nappt or LHCF, etc not be mentioned because the members would not be protected and clearly don't want the attention. Some of us would rather go unnoticed.

I agree 100% that you should send this letter. Your enthusiasm shines through and I agree with everything you said. I also think that you should not mention LHCF. There are a lot of haters out there, one example is someone saying on another website that a lot of the ladies on LHCF wear wigs and pass it off as their own hair. If people are really serious about taking care of their hair and believe that they can grow their hair long they will find LHCF. We don't want the non-believers saturating the site with negativity. Do send the letter. Other than what is already pointed out, it is a well written letter.
I also agree with this^
 

Crissi

New Member
Yup ITA, i was thinking this before i came into the thread...

I'm sorry but I don't want LHCF featured on the Tyra Show. And I'm sure I'm not the only person here on this board that feels that way. :look: This site is like a safe haven for many people. Especially since we post pictures and discuss personal matters. And if you put it on the Tyra Show this site is going to become utter chaos. We just saw that earlier this week with somebody coming to the board and discovering they knew somebody here in real life. It just turned into a total circus at that person's expense and was not fair. :nono: Everybody is not ready to absorb all the resources and information on this site. They're not in the right frame of mind yet. I think you should still write into the show because I think this is a topic that needs to be done but I don't think you should put the site in there.
 

bluerose17

New Member
The letter is pretty good to me, but I do think that you should incorporate a few of the ideas for the show that lisana and Mizani_MRS mentioned in their posts. Other than that, I support you all the way!!
 

SparklingFlame

New Member
A woman’s hair is her crowning glory. It adds to her beauty and sexuality. Yet Black Women are plagued with an ever present insecurity of their crowning glory, their hair. We have been lead to believe that we have “bad” hair. We have been lead to believe that our hair can not grow and that our hair can only achieve beautiful, great lengths with hair extensions. We have been lead to believe this lie from society, our mothers, our ancestors, other cultures, the media, our stylist and we have even convinced ourselves of this lie.

After seeing the Tyra Show episode about men of different races perceptions of women of different races, I was completely offended. Only one of the men found the black women desirable enough to marry. None of the men found the black women desirable enough to fantasize about. The Asian guy stated that he does not like the hair of the black women but she has her behind to offer as a beautiful, desirable thing. I was completely offended and I could only imagine how insecure and hurt the black women in the audience felt. I can only imagine that they left the studio feeling undesirable and unwanted.

I would like to propose a show about Black Women with Very Long Hair. I personally know hundreds of Black Women with long hair around the world. They are busting the myth and helping other women to do it as well. Black and mixed ethnicity women are growing their hair to long lengths at rates never imagined before by the African American community. We have been sabotaged long enough by damaging hair practices passed to us by the hair industry, our hair stylist, and even our unknowledgeable family members.

I believe a Black Hair Care Expert and several long haired black women can come on the show and share tips, techniques, and the steps that have attributed to their growth retention. All of the women will have bra strap length to tail bone length hair. They will present proof that they have normal African American hair and it is long, healthy, and real. It’s about Black Women learning that they are not so different and their hair is normal. It’s about Black Women feeling beautiful, desirable, and sexy while having fun with growing their hair like never before. Black Women do grow their hair. Black Women are sexy. Black Women are desirable. Black Women’s hair is unique and it is capable to be just as beautiful, thick, strong, healthy, and shiny as any other race or culture. Whether relaxed, “textlaxed”, or natural, our hair is beautiful and the most versatile of any race.

I believe Tyra, being a Black Women who I am sure has challenges with her hair, would love to know about black hair care and have some guest come and share their tips, stories and testimonials on the show. Tyra has laid the foundation for presenting Black Women to be desirable. I believe its time to add to the image Tyra has created and present this to the world.


Is this a little better?

Understand, I AM NOT looking for whether you agree with the letter. I am looking for support and edits to the letter. That is it. If you do not support it then please do not post. Thank You!
Oh he__ no! :angry2:
 

Amber_moon

Well-Known Member
A woman’s hair is her crowning glory. It adds to her beauty and sexuality. Yet Black Women are plagued with an ever present insecurity of their crowning glory, their hair. We have been lead to believe that we have “bad” hair. We have been lead to believe that our hair can not grow and that our hair can only achieve beautiful, great lengths with hair extensions. We have been lead to believe this lie from society, our mothers, our ancestors, other cultures, the media, our stylist and we have even convinced ourselves of this lie.

After seeing the Tyra Show episode about men of different races perceptions of women of different races, I was completely offended. Only one of the men found the black women desirable enough to marry. None of the men found the black women desirable enough to fantasize about. The Asian guy stated that he does not like the hair of the black women but she has her behind to offer as a beautiful, desirable thing. I was completely offended and I could only imagine how insecure and hurt the black women in the audience felt. I can only imagine that they left the studio feeling undesirable and unwanted.

I would like to propose a show about Black Women with Very Long Hair. I personally know hundreds of Black Women with long hair around the world. They are busting the myth and helping other women to do it as well. Black and mixed ethnicity women are growing their hair to long lengths at rates never imagined before by the African American community. We have been sabotaged long enough by damaging hair practices passed to us by the hair industry, our hair stylist, and even our unknowledgeable family members.

I believe a Black Hair Care Expert and several long haired black women can come on the show and share tips, techniques, and the steps that have attributed to their growth retention. All of the women will have bra strap length to tail bone length hair. They will present proof that they have normal African American hair and it is long, healthy, and real. It’s about Black Women learning that they are not so different and their hair is normal. It’s about Black Women feeling beautiful, desirable, and sexy while having fun with growing their hair like never before. Black Women do grow their hair. Black Women are sexy. Black Women are desirable. Black Women’s hair is unique and it is capable to be just as beautiful, thick, strong, healthy, and shiny as any other race or culture. Whether relaxed, “textlaxed”, or natural, our hair is beautiful and the most versatile of any race.

I believe Tyra, being a Black Women who I am sure has challenges with her hair, would love to know about black hair care and have some guest come and share their tips, stories and testimonials on the show. Tyra has laid the foundation for presenting Black Women to be desirable. I believe its time to add to the image Tyra has created and present this to the world.


Is this a little better?

Understand, I AM NOT looking for whether you agree with the letter. I am looking for support and edits to the letter. That is it. If you do not support it then please do not post. Thank You!

I just have a few tips. When you are writing a letter like this its not always a good idea to repeat the same phrase more than once. When you do that, it makes the letter come off very amateurish and unrefined. You could increase the letters "sophistication" by choosing different phrases that mean the same thing. For example instead of "led to believe" 5 million times, try using "persuaded to believe" or "taught to believe". Or instead of Completly offended twice within the same paragraph try offended/taken aback/flabbergasted etc.... See what I mean?

Also, pluralize "stylist", and take out the "I believe Tyra..." part and replace it with "I believe YOU".... (as you are writing to her...)

Change "can come on the show" to "SHOULD APPEAR on the show", and change "Will have bra strap..." to "Should have bra strap"


Hope this helps!
 
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