Why do you relax?

Odd One

Well-Known Member
I keep hearing about how going natural was a great decision. But when it comes to relaxers i rarely hear about the positive reasons of it. To all the ladies that have been relaxed all their lifes or decided to relax after years of being natural, i'm curious:grin:: Why do you/did you relax? is it because of manageable hair? you prefer it straight? or you just carried on with what you already have? or something else ?

I'm having a hair crisis and need some pros on relaxed hair lol


p.s. you might have to pardon my english, i mostly speak french irl
 

Crackers Phinn

Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
Hello and Welcome! :wave:

I relaxed because of knotting issues with my natural hair that interfered with me retaining length. I no longer have the issue and am very pleased with the progress my hair has made.
 

JessCNU

New Member
Hello :)

I relaxed again after a year of being natural because I preferred how my hair looked and felt relaxed. Before I went natural my hair was slightly damaged but that was because I was doing all of the wrong things to it. Now that I know how to take care of relaxed hair properly I love it! When I was wearing my hair natural I was just blow drying at flat ironing all the time so I was like what's the point of this?? why not just relax.
 

heyfranz

Well-Known Member
In the past 6 years, i've been natural twice, relaxed twice. Currently relaxed. I don't know. I get bored with my hair not knowing how to style it, and relax again. Then i would get damage, and return to natural. Hopefully now that i've found LHCF, i won't have the issues i've dealt with before no matter which way i decide to go next.
 

Simply_Kelz

New Member
I'm relaxed because the styles that I prefer right now tend to be easier to do on straight hair. I also don't want to be one of those people who went natural because their relaxed hair was damaged. I want to experience both long, relaxed and healthy hair, and long, natural healthy hair. I also don't want to cut it right now.
 

tbaby_8

Active Member
I have been relaxed or texlaxed most of my life, but I didn't know how to care for it. I suffered damage. I have never been natural and am considering it, but I know I can't do natural in the summer. My hair hates humidity. It becomes a frizzy mess. So I may remain texlaxed to help control the frizziness, but still keep some body to my hair.
 

kittenz

Well-Known Member
I was relaxed because I was extremely tender haired as a child. I would cry everytime a comb was mentioned. So my mom did the humane thing for me:lachen:. Now I just keep it up.
 
I don't think I could deal with my natural hair......NOW, I don't hate it, I love what GOD gave me, but I wanted a change, with me, having a relaxer I can wear my hair curly(yes I still have my curls with my relaxer, it's not a texturizer), wavy or straight, if I'm in a hurry I can moisturize, oil and ponytail.....I don't know, I'm not knocking natural hair, but I have a busy life style......the afro puff and the afro style is very beautiful, but IMO, it's not beautiful on me......I still have texture and thickness with my relaxer. Now probably when my daughter gets older and I'll have more free time, I probably would try to go natural again, but right now being a busy college student and a single mom, I just don't have the time to be natural.....sometimes, I don't want to do my hair....so with a relaxer I can let hang down or a quick ponytail.......the chemical alone is damaging, but I know how to take care of my relaxed hair.......NOW I'm going to say this and I dont care what anyone says, but if I had silky naturally curly hair like Mya, or Tracee Ellis Ross, or Chilli (from TLC), then I would keep my hair natural because, the silkiness (sp?) is natural and so is the curl.....There is nothing wrong with natural hair, but when I was natural, I had to wet my hair everyday, I felt like I couldn't do nothing with my natural hair but wet it......I got tired of washing my hair all the time......but if I can grow my hair with a relaxer then I'll keep a relaxer......if I have upset anyone with a statement I made, I do apologize, these are just my opinions!
 

SignatureBeauty

New Member
I don't think I could deal with my natural hair......NOW, I don't hate it, I love what GOD gave me, but I wanted a change, with me, having a relaxer I can wear my hair curly(yes I still have my curls with my relaxer, it's not a texturizer), wavy or straight, if I'm in a hurry I can moisturize, oil and ponytail.....I don't know, I'm not knocking natural hair, but I have a busy life style......the afro puff and the afro style is very beautiful, but IMO, it's not beautiful on me......I still have texture and thickness with my relaxer. Now probably when my daughter gets older and I'll have more free time, I probably would try to go natural again, but right now being a busy college student and a single mom, I just don't have the time to be natural.....sometimes, I don't want to do my hair....so with a relaxer I can let hang down or a quick ponytail.......the chemical alone is damaging, but I know how to take care of my relaxed hair.......NOW I'm going to say this and I dont care what anyone says, but if I had silky naturally curly hair like Mya, or Tracee Ellis Ross, or Chilli (from TLC), then I would keep my hair natural because, the silkiness (sp?) is natural and so is the curl.....There is nothing wrong with natural hair, but when I was natural, I had to wet my hair everyday, I felt like I couldn't do nothing with my natural hair but wet it......I got tired of washing my hair all the time......but if I can grow my hair with a relaxer then I'll keep a relaxer......if I have upset anyone with a statement I made, I do apologize, these are just my opinions!


Girl! I am sure it is alot more people who feel that way but never said anything because of the "Good Hair"/ "Bad Hair" Issue. No Apologies Needed! I knew my Natural hair wasn't gonna be like that LOL!! I had a Heavy Duty Fro as a Child, Nothing Silky or Ringlet about that LOL!!
 
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Highly Favored8

Well-Known Member
I have been natural all my life up until about 2000 and now I am going to relax once a year then stop relaxing all together. I relax b/c of the different texture my hair was from natural however since I have been going for 26 week relaxers my hair is doing very well so, I may go on to natural who knows =)
 

BeautifulFlower

Well-Known Member
I dont want to transition.

I have thick hair without being natural so I could only imagine.

Natural hair doesnt guarentee healthier hair.

I like to relax my own hair honestly I do.

I also hear about the issues some naturals have with their hair and I dont want to deal with those issues such as single strand knots that can prevent you from retaining length.

But this is totally MY reasons. I probably wont go natural but I do plan to get dreads later in life.
 

LovelyRo

Well-Known Member
My hair is coarse and very thick! I relax for manageability purposes and also style. I like wearing my hair straight. I know I would have a lot of bad hair days if I were natural!!!
 

Angelicus

Well-Known Member
ma cherie, je parle francais aussi (parce que j'etais nee a la nouvelle orleans). Anyhoo, I relax because I like my hair straight without heat. I also like the styles that I can do with relaxed hair.
 

shininnebear

New Member
I dont want to transition.

I have thick hair without being natural so I could only imagine.

Natural hair doesnt guarentee healthier hair.

I like to relax my own hair honestly I do.

I also hear about the issues some naturals have with their hair and I dont want to deal with those issues such as single strand knots that can prevent you from retaining length.

But this is totally MY reasons. I probably wont go natural but I do plan to get dreads later in life.


I agree with this, because it is true. It makes my hair more manageable, even though the chems are harsh. But this board is an inspiration that relaxed hair can be healthy with proper care. To each his own :rolleyes:
 

Son26

Well-Known Member
I like straight hair.

I could be wrong, but it seems like some naturals spend a lot of time on their hair (detangling)? I don't like spending a lot of time on my hair.
 

Odd One

Well-Known Member
Thank you all for the reponses. I think i made this thread because i've been thinkin about assuming my natural tresses but i have too much hair on my head and couldn't see myself dealing with all that (i'm only between ear and neck lenght now... this is bad!! lol) and i was thinking that i would feel bad for craving that creamy crack!

Tho when i wear my TWA and look at myself in the mirror i like what i see. This might sound weird but i feel and look BLACK, i feel like this is how i should look like in my purest form. Then i put the sew-ins back in, feel more confident because i know i wont get weird looks walking down the street, no stress with tangles but know that i look like a white version of myself....huhh yeah this is getting off topic and i really dont mean to sound offensive to those who have a relaxer(with the i feel black/white) cuz im 80% sure ill get one now that i hear those responses and learn how to take care of relaxed hair.

I guess i'm having an identity crisis too lol... anyway keep going with the reponses =)
 

JessCNU

New Member
Tho when i wear my TWA and look at myself in the mirror i like what i see. This might sound weird but i feel and look BLACK, i feel like this is how i should look like in my purest form. Then i put the sew-ins back in, feel more confident because i know i wont get weird looks walking down the street, no stress with tangles but know that i look like a white version of myself.


Wow I'm sorry you feel that way. No matter what your hair looks like or what you do to it, you should still feel black if that's what you consider yourself to be. I feel like A perm or weave shouldn't determine or define your blackness(or non blackness). If I'm bald, permed, weaved, or natural I'm black before all of that. No offense to you in any way but It just get's to me when some naturals(not you) come off like if you have a perm you denying your blackness. :ohwell:
 

Evazhair

New Member
decided uto relax after years of being natural, i'm curious:grin:: Why do you/did you relax?
I did because I wanted to wear mainly straight styles and I live in the DMV where it would revert too quickly.Heck, it reverts with the least bit of moisture. Had I known about LHCF or some of the techniques I have learned here, I may have had better luck trying to keep it straight.

is it because of manageable hair? no. my hair is manageable naturally as long as I have conditioner and moisture.
 
I texlax because my mom put a relaxer in my hair when I was 11 and I've had one since then. I don't feel like transitioning..it feels like I'll be starting all over again. Besides, it hasn't damaged my hair at all..
 

hairsothick

Black and Magical
I'm relaxed because that's all I have been since 1st or 2nd grade. I've never been b a l d h e a d e d and have only had one major burn incident that wasn't my fault. My hair still has a good bit of thickness to it, I just need to learn how to leave it alone. I will go natural one day, but right now I just don't feel like it.
 

Odd One

Well-Known Member
ma cherie, je parle francais aussi (parce que j'etais nee a la nouvelle orleans). Anyhoo, I relax because I like my hair straight without heat. I also like the styles that I can do with relaxed hair.

hehe Salut! ca va bien la bas? :grin:

Wow I'm sorry you feel that way. No matter what your hair looks like or what you do to it, you should still feel black if that's what you consider yourself to be. I feel like A perm or weave shouldn't determine or define your blackness(or non blackness). If I'm bald, permed, weaved, or natural I'm black before all of that. No offense to you in any way but It just get's to me when some naturals(not you) come off like if you have a perm you denying your blackness. :ohwell:

It's not so much that i feel less black but it looks like it highlights my features in a different way(dunno if that makes sense..) but i also gotta admit that i went to another forum (you know that be-natural-or-die website :rolleyes:lol) and saw youtube videos that scuuurred me and made me feel bad for wanting to relax lol either way i understand what u meant *sings "i am not my haiiirrr"* (i sing real bad yall cover your ears:look:)
 

Blu217

Well-Known Member
I relax a few times per year because I do not have a softer grade of hair that would make being natural more manageable. I have tried transitioning a few times, but my kinky textured hair proved to be more difficult to manage than I was prepared to deal with. For me it's about practicality and lifestyle.

I am in the camp that believes 3-grade hair is easier to wear natural. 4-type is simply more challenging because of its coarser texture, tendency to knot and tangle and resist combing and detangling.
 

princesszmunda

New Member
Wow this thread is right on time for me!

I have been transitioning for the last year and a half and the whole time I have worn a sew in with the exception of the few weeks in between sew ins that I give my hair a rest.

I work in corporate and have a really busy lifestyle (anyone else out there who is and still manages well?)...I am torn, my hair is definitely either 4a or 4b...and it is so thick it is an all day affair to wash, condition etc....gosh I love how beautiful natural hair is ...just not sure if I am at the time in my life where I can do it.....
 
Tout simplement, pour moi, c'est plus facile. Aussi, j'apprecie tout les diverses manieres donc je peux coiffer mes cheveux. Nul "style" que j'avais quand j'etais petite n'a pas pris beaucoup d'effort et enfin si je respirais un peux, s'il etait humide, woomph, un afro.

J'aime les afros, et je pense peut-etre un jour en avoir un mais l'idee de ne pas etre capable de coiffer mes cheveux (et non pas les nattes) me rend mal a l'aise.

Je suis d'accord avec la femme en haute qui a dit si elle avait les cheveux comme Tracey Ellen Ross etc qu'elle les porterait. Une femme comme ca peux decide: boucle ou raide.

***Pardon, je suis americaine, et je ne parle pas francais dans ma vie quotidienne et surtout pas au sujet des cheveux!! J'espere que ce ne sois pas si mal a comprendre.***
 

prospurr4

Well-Known Member
After years of being natural, I texlax because:

- I can spend less time on my hair, ie detangling is sooooo much easier.
- I don't like direct heat but can easily wear straight or curly styles with rollersets.
- I can still wear "textured" styles.
- I get to enjoy the actual length of my hair, with less shrinkage.
- I still have plenty of thickness.
- Since I'm a self-texlaxer, touchups (only 4 times a year) are easy and inexpensive.
- I don't have "issues" with texlaxing, ie burning, shedding, breakage, etc.
- In spite of being texlaxed, my hair is the longest it has ever been in my life.
 

JessCNU

New Member
hehe Salut! ca va bien la bas? :grin:



It's not so much that i feel less black but it looks like it highlights my features in a different way(dunno if that makes sense..) but i also gotta admit that i went to another forum (you know that be-natural-or-die website :rolleyes:lol) and saw youtube videos that scuuurred me and made me feel bad for wanting to relax lol either way i understand what u meant *sings "i am not my haiiirrr"* (i sing real bad yall cover your ears:look:)


Hahaha! yesss! I went on you tube one day and looked at those videos! I was like OMG everybody with a relaxer was bald with 3rd degree burns lol. I was like... ummmm ok.
 
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