White girl calling my hair nappy

BizzyB131

New Member
Ok so I am at work and comment on my white friends new hair color. You know I was asking where did she go and who did it. I also mentioned I would like to get my own hair highlighted . Well she takes it upon herself saying " well I don't know if she knows how to do your kind of hair " , " I don't think she will know how to deal with your nappy hair" . I had to catch myself, cause 1. I was at work, and 2. this coworker and I are close outside of work where as her Dad calls me his other daughter. What also shocked me is she has a biracial child!!!!!

Did I say I wanted this lady to style my hair ..... no , and if i did get it colored I would style it myself since I have yet to meet someone white black or green, who could do my natural hair.

Why does my hair have to be nappy? The word Nappy has such negative connotations ......... sorry yall I had to vent!!!!:censored:
 

Inches411

New Member
i agree you should have in a polite way tell her that you were offended.. dont let her get away with that. I mean some ppl dont see the word as negative but some ppl do and that should be explained to her.
 

LongHairDreams

New Member
Ok so I am at work and comment on my white friends new hair color. You know I was asking where did she go and who did it. I also mentioned I would like to get my own hair highlighted . Well she takes it upon herself saying " well I don't know if she knows how to do your kind of hair " , " I don't think she will know how to deal with your nappy hair" . I had to catch myself, cause 1. I was at work, and 2. this coworker and I are close outside of work where as her Dad calls me his other daughter. What also shocked me is she has a biracial child!!!!!

Did I say I wanted this lady to style my hair ..... no , and if i did get it colored I would style it myself since I have yet to meet someone white black or green, who could do my natural hair.

Why does my hair have to be nappy? The word Nappy has such negative connotations ......... sorry yall I had to vent!!!!:censored:

I agree with the bolded. It's a shame its that way. She should have known better then to say that to you. Honestly, what does "nappy" really mean?
 

Ms.Honey

New Member
Ok so I am at work and comment on my white friends new hair color. You know I was asking where did she go and who did it. I also mentioned I would like to get my own hair highlighted . Well she takes it upon herself saying " well I don't know if she knows how to do your kind of hair " , " I don't think she will know how to deal with your nappy hair" . I had to catch myself, cause 1. I was at work, and 2. this coworker and I are close outside of work where as her Dad calls me his other daughter. What also shocked me is she has a biracial child!!!!!

Did I say I wanted this lady to style my hair ..... no , and if i did get it colored I would style it myself since I have yet to meet someone white black or green, who could do my natural hair.

Why does my hair have to be nappy? The word Nappy has such negative connotations ......... sorry yall I had to vent!!!!:censored:

Honey, girlfriends say anything out of their mouths black or white or whatever:grin:. If you think she was trying to belittle you by calling your hair nappy then put her in her place quick. I personally don't find the term negative but if you do then let her know that. If she was black and called your hair nappy would you have felt equally insulted. I know when people of other races say certain things they can evoke a totally different emotion than if someone of your own race says it.
 

SoAnxious12

New Member
But either way, she has no right to judge your hair. But don't take it too personally she probably doesn't really know what nappy means lol. pull her to the side and tell her about herself
 
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chebaby

Well-Known Member
Yall be letting some of these polar bears get away with murder!!!:lachen:
thank you. why did you not say anything. i would have atleast said "nappy is a negative word and i know my hair is beautiful, with that said i wasnt asking for you to recomend someone who could do my hair i was just commenting, now when i need a reference from you i will ask ok?"
 

Inches411

New Member
Honey, girlfriends say anything out of their mouths black or white or whatever:grin:. If you think she was trying to belittle you by calling your hair nappy then put her in her place quick. I personally don't find the term negative but if you do then let her know that. If she was black and called your hair nappy would you have felt equally insulted. I know when people of other races say certain things they can evoke a totally different emotion than if someone of your own race says it.


true.. you were there so only you would know if she meant it to be insultign or not.
 

glamazon386

Well-Known Member
i agree you should have in a polite way tell her that you were offended.. dont let her get away with that. I mean some ppl dont see the word as negative but some ppl do and that should be explained to her.

That white girl knew what she was saying when she said it.
 

BizzyB131

New Member
In hindsight I so wish I had set her straight , I think I was more in shock that she even said it to begin with !

Yall be letting some of these polar bears get away with murder!!!:lachen:

^^^ :lachen: true.

When I saw the title of this thread, I was like "Oh, he!! naw!!!" :boxing:

:lachen: For real! You should have set her @$$ straight!

I agree cuz she would've ate those words... literally.
 

anon123

Well-Known Member
Uh oh. Maybe she saw my nappy love shirt and thought it would be okay.



Or maybe she saw one of these books:
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_g...h-alias=aps&field-keywords=nappy+hair&x=0&y=0

Yeah, that's a delicate word, I think you know when it is and isn't said in love. Just as a friend, you might want to let her know that most people don't like that word and she should be careful how and where she uses it. To be on the safe side, she might want to refrain from using it completely.
 

BizzyB131

New Member
Luckily her child is a boy , with flaming red hair :burning:.... I just hope she doesn't say anything like that to her new black man she is dating cause he was 2 biracial twin daughters

:blush:
You said her child is biracial? Her poor child... I hope it's not a girl and I
hope she doesn't tell her she has nappy hair.


& :lachen: @ the polar bear comment!
 

BizzyB131

New Member
I so too think she was trying to be insulting . She has some low esteem and ever since she lost a huge amount of weight she has said some things that have come off really cocky like.

Exactly! Trust me, calling your hair "nappy" wasn't a compliment. :nono:

That white girl knew what she was saying when she said it.

I agree.... I know she is your friend, but she is going to say something like that to the wrong sister and get her feelings hurt.

She sounds like she could benefit from a "pull to the side" and some schooling.
 

Sunshine0801

New Member
I don't see the big deal. It doesn't sound like she was trying to insult you, and unlike the other N word, the word nappy is not universally understood to be an insult, is it? It's all about how it's used, no?

Now if she called your nappy hair ugly or something, THEN I could understand. But just mentioning that your hair is nappy? What should she have said?

I don't see why people are getting all offended over the word nappy like she cursed you out. Nappy hair IS beautiful!
 

envybeauty

New Member
Don Imus lost his job for using the word. He didn't say n!gger, he said nappy


I don't see the big deal. It doesn't sound like she was trying to insult you, and unlike the other N word, the word nappy is not universally understood to be an insult, is it? It's all about how it's used, no?

Now if she called your nappy hair ugly or something, THEN I could understand. But just mentioning that your hair is nappy? What should she have said?

I don't see why people are getting all offended over the word nappy like she cursed you out. Nappy hair IS beautiful!
 

BizzyB131

New Member
lol sometimes I wonder what they see and hear and think its okay to repeat. She couldn't understand why I was not feeling this guy who kept saying the "n" word all the time. She was like but he is saying it with the "ah" not the "er" .


Uh oh. Maybe she saw my nappy love shirt and thought it would be okay.



quote]


Yeah..Or maybe she kep hearing it from her black boyfriend
 

chebaby

Well-Known Member
I don't see the big deal. It doesn't sound like she was trying to insult you, and unlike the other N word, the word nappy is not universally understood to be an insult, is it? It's all about how it's used, no?

Now if she called your nappy hair ugly or something, THEN I could understand. But just mentioning that your hair is nappy? What should she have said?

I don't see why people are getting all offended over the word nappy like she cursed you out. Nappy hair IS beautiful!
ha, the hell its not. the word nappy is negative. think about it, even when a black person says "your hair is nappy" what they are saying is "you need to conduct that, get it under control and keep it done". to me its negative and i dont play that
 

Sunshine0801

New Member
Don Imus lost his job for using the word. He didn't say n!gger, he said nappy

Well, yes, but he didn't JUST say nappy. Like I said, it's all about how it's used. It was obvious that he was trying to be offensive. It's not clear in the OP's post that her friend was trying to be offensive.
 
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