H
HoneyRockette
Guest
I was looking through my old box of disks for a file and I found Yvette's posts from the BHC. Remember her? She grew her hair from shoulder length to almost waist length in a year wearing buns. I had copied all of her posts and put it onto one page and printed it out for inspiration. It may seem confusing because she is answering questions and I didn't save the questions because it was too long (and half of that thread was just a series of CONGRATS and YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION). I tried to separate the posts the best I could. Even though we know more now, I thought it would be nice to reminisce.
So glad to know that there are other African Americans who are into growing healthy hair.
As for myself, after using everything from "magic" hair grease to hair vitamins, I'd found that common sense and patience were the main things I needed.
My hair has gone from being a little past my shoulders to about four inches from my waist. (And no, for all you wisegals/guys out there, I am not a malformed person whose head is only a few inches from her waist anyway.) Now, granted, it took me a year to do it, but just think...how long was your hair 1 year ago? So, how long do you think it will be 1 year from today, by using the methods you are now? For me, this translated into about 8 inches in one year. And I don't use any potions or high-priced conditioners, etc. I simply follow the advice of a little, common sense pamphlet called the "Hair Care Handbook". Now, I just wash, condition (I've chosen to do it weekly), get my ends trimmed a little when I do my retouches (once a month or else the amount of new growth makes my hair uncontrollable and very poofy), wear my hair up most of the time and sleep on a satin pillowcase. The only thing extra that I do is to put a little conditioner or water on the ends of my hair before I put it up for the night, just to keep them moist. From there it's just a matter of patience. I didn't like wearing my hair up because it seemed to defeat the purpose of having it grow long, so I said I'd do it for a year or until my hair grows to a length that I really like and it's about there. The year will be over on October 31st. Can't wait to be able to wear my hair loose again!
Also, I have to give credit to the Wanakee.com site. Her advice is interesting and fairly similar to what the "Haircare Handbook" has, only with the "Handbook" I didn't have to buy any special/expensive products and it gives more details on how to perm, wash, comb, dry, etc.
Well, to give you an idea, my hair is, at least, as long as that customer in the "Real Customer Before and After" section of Wanakee's site, only I didn't have to wait years for it to happen for me like she and Wanakee did. Now, the only problem I have (like the lady in the Wanakee site) is trying to convince people who have seen me in my weekend ponytail, that this is all my real hair and that I'm not mixed. And, goodness, the remarks I've heard whispered from jealous girls. But, believe me, I'm having a ball with it! I'm enjoying all this hair and the attention that seems to go with it! If I get all this notice from men and curiosity from women with just a ponytail on the weekends, I'm going to have a blast when I can curl my hair and let it hang loose!!!
That's the great thing about this method, you can wear any style you like as long as the ends are not exposed to air. For me, that means gathering my hair in the back as though I'm going to put it in a ponytail, but instead of putting a band on it, I twist my hair around until it's in a round bun. The front is in a bang that reaches about 1/2 inch past my eyebrows. But, don't stop there. There are a lot of nice up-do's to choose from. I just picked that one because it was the fastest in the mornings and I can change it by putting accessories on or around the bun.
The products I use are so few that you probably won't believe me. I use Cream of Nature regular shampoo/conditioner combo because (as you'll find out as your hair gets longer) my combouts are tons easier from using it. When I perm, I use Dark and Lovely regular (only I don't use that pre-treatment packet because it makes my hair hard to manage during the retouch) and I save the conditioner that comes with it to put on the last 3 inches of my hair after washing and before putting my hair up, just to give a good coating to the ends. And that's it. No hair spray, no oil or grease, no spritz and, incidentally, no blow drying. I wash and comb out my hair while I'm in the shower, combing it all backwards, then I put it in an actual ponytail, using cut (crosswise of course) pantyhose (they're much gentler on your hair than bands) then, I just let it dry naturally that way. It turns out very well. And, actually, my hair's growth rate wasn't as much of an advantage to growing hair as it can seem. For example, before starting this new method of haircare, I remember having measured my hair after a year and found that I'd only gained 1 inch. I wanted long hair very badly and I was so devastated that I wanted to cry because this meant that no matter how fast my hair grew, it was breaking off just as quickly. It seemed a losing battle. But, fortunately, I'm stubborn. I wouldn't give up on something I really wanted. Also, my hair does grow about 3/4 inch/month, but I tend to trim off around half of that each month. The big thing is to try as hard as you can to protect the ends while being gentle on the scalp. That's when you'll see results!!!
I don't oil my scalp because I believe that it adds nothing to my hair's health in the least. Believe me, when I tell people this, they react like I'd just told them I eat worms for breakfast. I didn't know I was being such a radical. But, my hair hasn't suffered a bit from not using it. It was a waste of money. I'm getting off cheap and I'm still reaping huge benefits!!! (Am I starting to sound like an infomercial or what?) I hope that no one gives in to believing long hair is impossible for them. I was told many times by hair care "specialists" that I couldn't grow long hair because I'm not white. My hair is naturally coarse and phenominally dry, so if I can grow long hair, anybody can! And it's so easy, you have to try these methods to believe it. Success to everybody!!!
I told you that you probably wouldn't believe me when I said that I hardly put anything on my hair. The hair washing routine is pretty much the same as my daily routine. In between washings I simply put some water or a little of the conditioner that came with the Dark and Lovely perm kit on about the last 2 inches of my hair, then I put my hair in my "up do" and go on about my day. And, remember, I'd mentioned using a satin pillowcase at night. Though, I know that some ladies like to use a satin scarf instead. That's good too, but sometimes I toss and turn a little too much for that to stay on.
Yes, my hair is naturally, phenominally dry. But I've found that, dry or not, it's not necessary to have my hair weighed down with a lot of extra chemicals (of course, the perming puts a lot of chems in the hair just by itself). I'd done the grease/oil thing for years and it had absolutely no benefits for my hair except to keep it greasy, heavy and fairly untouchable. But, remember when I'd stated that I use Cream of Nature shampoo/conditioner combo, well it leaves enough of a coating on my hair to keep it from actually looking dry. My ends, however, need the extra coating of conditioner in order to keep them from splitting. I know it's hard to believe, which is why I guess a lot of women still use grease. But, if you try not using it after just one washing, you'll see what I mean! You just might get hooked on the results!!!
Before using the routine I do now, I tried everything I heard of. Scalp massages, brushing vigorously with round-bristled brush, Vitamin E oil massages, magic hair growth grease, hair vitamins from a natural foods store, eating lots of wheat germ, over trimming the ends, etc. Then, I used to actually stop total strangers in the street, or wherever I found women who had longer hair than mine, and I'd interrogate them as to what products they were using, how often they got trims, etc. Some of whom were very helpful and gave whatever advice they could and some, pretty blatantly, didn't want to tell me anything that would make my hair look as good as theirs. So, believe me, I can relate to desperation.
I'm more than glad to tell you how you can order the "Hair Care Handbook", please write to:
ALSIA Co.
P.O. Box 25071
Richmond, VA. 23260-5071
When you write, please be certain to mention the name of that particular handbook because they have others on, i.e. dieting, how to handle stress, etc. It's a cheap pamphlet, only about $2.50, plus a buck for shipping, but it's something that you'll refer to for the rest of your life and it contains information that, I'm sure, you will want to pass on to your friends and relatives.
ALSIA Co. doesn't have a website that I know of. But, yes, I do relax my hair using Dark & Lovely regular strength.
I'm glad to hear that someone can relate. I've had strangers to actually come up and run their hands down the back of my head, without my permission, looking for tracks, just to prove that my hair is fake and you should see their faces when they find it isn't. They end up looking so ridiculous! That's the fun part of those types of encounters!!! It's very difficult convincing other African American ladies that you've managed to accomplish what so many still believe to be impossible for us.
And to all you ladies who are on a long hair quest, please do expect to put up with some strange behavior from people who are curious about your long hair. They will want to run their fingers through it, play with it, have you stand there while they call their friends over to look at it (and play with it), some will have you explain, on the spot, your family heritage to prove that you're not one half or one third white or Native American, and yank your hair a little to see if it hurts (they figure if it's a weave, it won't hurt). It's pretty comical actually, but if you're not used to strangers touching any part of you, you may not think it's so funny at first. Please try and be patient. It's really a kind of flattery!!!
The only thing that concerns me about wearing it is the manipulation of the ends. If there's a way that you can be certain not to snag or tangle and break the ends as you're braiding and to make sure that the ends are in great shape before you begin (trimmed and conditioned). That sounds like a great style to me!
Coincidentally, I'd just re-ordered Wanakee's free guide too. It came within two weeks this time. (I'd let someone borrow the one I did have and they didn't return it.) You might want to call the 800 number and check to make sure they have your correct address. I had to do that the first time too. I do use the "Hair Care Handbook" for ultimate advice, but I like to keep a copy of her guide so that, as mine grows, I can compare it to hers. And, because I like that hairdo on the front cover and I want to copy it, but I need the picture to do it with.
I'm so glad you've found cheaper products that work for you! And, I see you like Creme of Nature. I haven't found a better detangling conditioner yet that doesn't contain alcohol.
By the way, I had to get substantial advice on trims, myself. It was a big setback putting trims off. But, I was phobic about them, having had so many people take off whatever amount they wanted despite my very specific instructions. Now, I do my own hair, everything from retouches to trims (I wash once a week and perm and trim once every four or five weeks depending on how much newgrowth I have).
Of course, I'm super excited because October 31st is the end of my experimental year! HOOOOORRAAAYYYY!!! I get to wear my hair down and measure to see it's full length!!! In about an hour I'm going to be celebrating!!!
And I can hardly wait till next year when you and I and all of the other ladies who have begun their year-long quest for greater hair length will be able to celebrate together!!!
Ladies, whatever you do, do not give up on your quest to grow long hair because when you reach your goal length, it's great!!! I know I should have a more sophisticated way of expressing myself after a year of waiting, but...IT'S JUST GREAT!!!
Ok, let's see, first of all, I didn't go to sleep for thinking about it the night before. Then, I got up early in the morning and washed it and pulled it back to dry naturally, putting an extra amount of conditioner on the ends because I knew I'd be wearing it loose for the first time in so long.
Well, my mother is highly critical of my hair, so I got some rollers together and went to her house. When I got there, I went upstairs and rolled my hair up. It was hot here on Sunday, so my hair dried pretty quickly, but it was still a little damp in the middle, BUT DO YOU THINK THAT STOPPED ME AFTER WAITING A YEAR?!?! I tried to roll my hair up and, you won't believe this, I couldn't do it! I mean, I couldn't do it right away. First, I felt guilty for putting a roller on my hair and potentially causing it stress, then I started to get phobic about the air drying my ends out and I began to imagine my hair falling out...but I kept swinging my hair around and feeling the new heaviness of it and decided, to heck with the phobia stuff...full steam ahead!!! I just had to see what it looked like with curls!!! Then I ran into another problem. Did you know that long hair can't be rolled up as shorter hair can? Well, I didn't. You have to either grow longer arms to go with your longer hair or you have to do what I did, you section your hair, then put the roller close to midway of your hair length of the section and wrap the end around first, then sort of twirled the roller up towards my scalp and, there, it was done! I used very few rollers because I wanted loose curls. I took them out after about 45 minutes and, just swung my hair back and forth (like they do on the commercials). Then, using my fingers, I smoothed the sides a little. No combing (I didn't want to risk snapping the ends), no blow drying, no hot curling. My mother came in on the hair swinging part and went on about how long it had gotten. Well, I knew it must look good then. But, no, I didn't fly to the morror. I sat in front on the edge of her bed and was entertaining all sorts of doubts like maybe it wouldn't look very long with curls in it, or what if it's gotten thinned out somehow or what if it wouldn't react well to the sponge rollers? Because, this was it! I'd told myself in the beginning of this experiment that if changing my hair care habits didn't work after this one year, I'd go back to what I was doing before and just deal with only gaining about a couple of inches a year (if I was fortunate). If this idea wasn't going to work, I was going to have to wait years for my hair to get long. Well, I finally coaxed myself into taking a look. Ladies, I wish you could see it!!! My hair is soooooooooo shiny and healthy looking and thick and heavy and, above all, LONG!!! I have taken the challenge and emerged victorious over all the stereotypes about African American women not being able to grow long hair!!! Oh, I celebrated by, temporarily, coming off of my diet. I ate candy and pizza and pasta and... Then, I went outside with it down and actually had women I didn't know oohing and ahing over my hair. I guess there are women who can tell that it's real after all!!! I felt like a movie star with all the fuss people were making!!! I had a blast and I'm still celebrating!!! MAY EVERYONE BE AS HAPPY AS WITH THEIR HAIR AS I AM!!!!
Sorry, I got so carried away telling what my results were and what I did to celebrate that I didn't catch my typos and I didn't answer the hair trimming question. But, here goes... The only reason I'd started getting trims at all was because I'd heard they would make my hair grow faster. I started trimming my hair myself because I'd gotten frustrated with hair care "professionals" who would take off however much hair they felt like cutting at the time. Yes, CUT, not trim. I believe the most I'd had taken off without permission was 3 inches. Well, before the trim, my hair was just barely past my shoulders at the time and it had taken me years to get that, so I was more than a little angry (so angry, in fact, that the beautician was afraid I would tear her shop apart). Believe me, the longer it gets the easier it is to see because you can see all the ends, even the back. No guessing whether or not you've gotten it even. I section my hair, then I comb down each section as flat to my head as I can, then I run two fingers down a section until I'm holding the end amount that I want to trim. I take off about a centimeter (2.54 cm = 1 inch). After each section is trimmed I put the Dark and Lovely conditioner on the ends so that they are immediately being kept moist. I believe the hardest part of keeping my hair up for a year was each day, resisting the temptation to wear it down. Especially in spring and summer, when a lot of ladies around here show off their new hairdos. Many in my town have weaves or extensions, and when they go flopping their ringlets around, it is tempting to join in the fun. And, being married, I know my husband would love to see me in something other than the "Susan B. Anthony look". He never complains, but I know he'd rather have me curl my hair. But, he also likes it long, so he's pleased with the results of my experiment! I don't want to wear my hair down this winter because the weather is too harsh outside, and the dry heat is too damaging inside. So, I'll be wearing my hair up, probably for the whole winter. But, I urge everyone to resist the temptation to just give up or to go back to wearing your hair down all the time. Once you see the results of persistence, you will never want to go back to the old methods of taking care of your hair! IT IS SOOOOOOO WORTH IT!!! I'M LIVING A DREAM!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR EVERYONE ELSE'S RESULTS!!!
I'm glad you got to see my reply to Susan regarding cornrows. And I'm very much in favor of the use of your naturally grown hair as much as possible when styling, even to the exclusion of the store-bought kind. But, regarding cornrows in general, I believe that as long as you wear a style that requires a minimum of chemicals and heat implements and it keeps your ends safe, it's a good grow-out style. I'm going to keep my hair up until spring. I'm being really cautious about keeping the cold outdoor air and dry indoor heat from causing breakage. But, now that my hair is long, I plan to wear it down for special occasions like Thanksgiving and New Year's and other fun gatherings. For the past year, I'd kept it in a bun, no matter what. I'm going to be careful, but, I plan on having some fun with my hair this year!!!
My hair grows about 3/4 of an inch per month. All told, during the past year I've managed to retain about 9 inches of new growth! I wash my hair once per week (due to time constraints, but I'd rather do it twice per week). Then, I put it in a ponytail while I'm in the shower and let it dry naturally before putting it in a bun. Actually, usually only the ponytail part is completely dry and the rest is still damp when I put it up.
I can relate to your salon horror stories. I've had so many negative experiences with them that I've been doing my own hair for years now.
The little handbook I'd mentioned in previous posts, really did a lot to change the way I care for my hair overall. I'm much more gentle with it now. For example, one of the bits of advice the pamphlet gives is that you should never yank a comb through your hair whether it's wet or dry. Well, I thought that was pretty stupid. I mean, how can I get the tangles out of my hair if I don't yank the comb through. But, I tried it (with the help of a detangler) and, though the comb-out took longer, it made so much difference in reducing the number of split ends I had. If I could narrow hair care down to just one piece of advice, I'd say that you really do have to baby the ends of your hair. If they're not taken care of, you won't see much new growth. That's what I like most about the grow-out year. I'm money-conscious and it was so cheap to get long hair. I'm delirously happy because of that too. I had grown up thinking that only the girls who could afford to go to the salon every couple of weeks could have long hair. ANOTHER MYTH BITES THE DUST! HEY! HEY!
My hair has been permed for about 20 years now. I'm back to using what I started out with after having shifted to several other perms and relaxers, Dark and Lovely regular strength. But, the handbook I'm using said that I should not go perm-hopping. That I should choose a reliable, gentle perm and stick with it. And for the past year, that's what I did. Give it a try!
Now my hair is approx. 3 inches from my waist.
You're right. As long as the ends are in kept in good condition, braids make a good style.
And, yes, leaving my hair alone as much as possible made all the difference. Who would have thought that doing practically nothing could be so rewarding?
I'm glad that you've already chosen a goal length because it'll be all the more exciting as you measure your hair getting closer and closer to that point! I can't wait to read your results!!!
I use Cream of Nature conditioning shampoo to detangle my hair. But, if you use it, please keep your eyes and mouth closed because it will numb your tongue and turn your eyes terribly red. (I know it sounds like common sense, but it wasn't for me, since I wash and comb-out my hair in the shower, usually opening my eyes at every odd sound and opening my mouth to breath) But, despite all this, it detangles like nothing else I've tried.
I know it gets boring sometimes, seeing other ladies wearing the latest hairdo's (this is especially hard for me to deal with in the spring and summer when I usually want to show off with everybody else after wearing hats and caps and hoods all winter long.) And because I'm hair-stylistically challenged, I really get in a rut because the only up-do that I really know how to do well is a bun. But, pleeeeeeease don't get discouraged! Don't give up! Don't be like I used to be, looking in the mirror at my short hair and thinking, "If I had started taking better care of it just six months ago, my hair would be four inches longer by now." Then I'd be mentally kicking myself. I'll tell you what I'd done during my grow-out year to make myself feel better. The only time I could see how much my hair had grown was when I'd take it down to wash it, so each month, right after washing, I'd measure and use every extra millimeter as a reason to celebrate! Then, I'd calculate how much longer it would be by the end of fall, then by the end of winter, etc. It sure made me feel better when I could mentally rack up those inches and remind myself every day of why I had my hair up and why I didn't care what people thought of my Susan B. Anthony look. Now, those people are absolutely in awe when they look at my hair. For me, that's part of the fun of having it long. Seeing the looks on the faces of people who had told me it couldn't be done. Believe me, if you're doing the year long grow-out, when your year is up you'll know exactly what I mean!
I'm 5'3" tall. And, yes, in one year I'd managed to retain more than 8 inches of new growth! And since I'm coming from a past record of only being able to keep about 1 inch, that's why I'm ecstatic!!!
Tell me, what shape are the ends of your hair in? I don't doubt that your hair is growing, but that you don't get to see the results of your new growth because the ends are very damaged. Do you have an excellent trim?
By the way Trevis, I love ponytails!!! But, it's dangerous to wear them because it leaves my ends fully exposed to the wind whipping past.
I still wear them sometimes, but it's usually only for a couple of hours on the weekends and I put extra conditioner on my ends (in fact, sometimes they're actually still wet when I leave the house) so that they can withstand the extra air exposure better.
I relaxed my hair regularly for the entire year I was gaining length, then I put it right back in a bun after the retouches. IF YOU REALLY WANT LONG HAIR, NEVER GIVE UP!!!
You're not pestering me at all. I'm more than glad to help!!!
1)Do you brush your hair?
I really only brush it enough to put it in a bun most mornings. But, I don't brush for scalp stimulation (tried that - it was a no go).
2) Do you take vitamins or just eat healthy?
As a matter of fact, I don't doubt that I have one of the worst diets in the U.S. I don't take vitamins, I skip meals and I don't eat nearly enough fruits and vegetables.
3) How do you keep your bun in place?
I use the small bobby pins. I've tried the big ones, but they just don't seem to stay in place as well.
5)How the heck do you perm your own hair? How long have you been doing that and werent you scared as a turkey at Thanksgiving that you wouldnt get ALL the new growth?
And I've been perming my own hair for about 14 years now. I did make mistakes at first. It took some getting used to. But, I can honestly say that I've never had to problems with my hair falling out when I do my own retouches, as I had when I'd let hairdressers do it for me.
Actually, after I wash my hair, I gently comb it into a ponytail while I'm still in the shower. I think it's because I use a detangling shampoo (my hair would be a tangled mess without one) and because I work with the the flow of water from the showerhead which helps to push my hair backwards as I'm combing the detangling shampoo/conditioner through, that helps me to have a very easy comb-out. I let my hair dry naturally for a while in a ponytail, then I twist it into a bun. In the morning, I just take the bobby pins out, put some conditioner on the ends (my hair is kind of stuck together so that just makes it easier to moisten the ends all together) then I twist it back around and put the bobby pins back in.
I've tried to put bobby pins in my hair while it's wet, but that leads to more breakage because that mean's forcing a metal object past delicate, wet strands of hair. Not good. (I can attest to that, because I've tried it.) My hair is coarse, but I still prefer to wait until the majority of it is air dried before I put it up.
P.S. The handbook Yvette is talking about no longer exists. Someone on another board found this out, so please don't send away for it.
So glad to know that there are other African Americans who are into growing healthy hair.
As for myself, after using everything from "magic" hair grease to hair vitamins, I'd found that common sense and patience were the main things I needed.
My hair has gone from being a little past my shoulders to about four inches from my waist. (And no, for all you wisegals/guys out there, I am not a malformed person whose head is only a few inches from her waist anyway.) Now, granted, it took me a year to do it, but just think...how long was your hair 1 year ago? So, how long do you think it will be 1 year from today, by using the methods you are now? For me, this translated into about 8 inches in one year. And I don't use any potions or high-priced conditioners, etc. I simply follow the advice of a little, common sense pamphlet called the "Hair Care Handbook". Now, I just wash, condition (I've chosen to do it weekly), get my ends trimmed a little when I do my retouches (once a month or else the amount of new growth makes my hair uncontrollable and very poofy), wear my hair up most of the time and sleep on a satin pillowcase. The only thing extra that I do is to put a little conditioner or water on the ends of my hair before I put it up for the night, just to keep them moist. From there it's just a matter of patience. I didn't like wearing my hair up because it seemed to defeat the purpose of having it grow long, so I said I'd do it for a year or until my hair grows to a length that I really like and it's about there. The year will be over on October 31st. Can't wait to be able to wear my hair loose again!
Also, I have to give credit to the Wanakee.com site. Her advice is interesting and fairly similar to what the "Haircare Handbook" has, only with the "Handbook" I didn't have to buy any special/expensive products and it gives more details on how to perm, wash, comb, dry, etc.
Well, to give you an idea, my hair is, at least, as long as that customer in the "Real Customer Before and After" section of Wanakee's site, only I didn't have to wait years for it to happen for me like she and Wanakee did. Now, the only problem I have (like the lady in the Wanakee site) is trying to convince people who have seen me in my weekend ponytail, that this is all my real hair and that I'm not mixed. And, goodness, the remarks I've heard whispered from jealous girls. But, believe me, I'm having a ball with it! I'm enjoying all this hair and the attention that seems to go with it! If I get all this notice from men and curiosity from women with just a ponytail on the weekends, I'm going to have a blast when I can curl my hair and let it hang loose!!!
That's the great thing about this method, you can wear any style you like as long as the ends are not exposed to air. For me, that means gathering my hair in the back as though I'm going to put it in a ponytail, but instead of putting a band on it, I twist my hair around until it's in a round bun. The front is in a bang that reaches about 1/2 inch past my eyebrows. But, don't stop there. There are a lot of nice up-do's to choose from. I just picked that one because it was the fastest in the mornings and I can change it by putting accessories on or around the bun.
The products I use are so few that you probably won't believe me. I use Cream of Nature regular shampoo/conditioner combo because (as you'll find out as your hair gets longer) my combouts are tons easier from using it. When I perm, I use Dark and Lovely regular (only I don't use that pre-treatment packet because it makes my hair hard to manage during the retouch) and I save the conditioner that comes with it to put on the last 3 inches of my hair after washing and before putting my hair up, just to give a good coating to the ends. And that's it. No hair spray, no oil or grease, no spritz and, incidentally, no blow drying. I wash and comb out my hair while I'm in the shower, combing it all backwards, then I put it in an actual ponytail, using cut (crosswise of course) pantyhose (they're much gentler on your hair than bands) then, I just let it dry naturally that way. It turns out very well. And, actually, my hair's growth rate wasn't as much of an advantage to growing hair as it can seem. For example, before starting this new method of haircare, I remember having measured my hair after a year and found that I'd only gained 1 inch. I wanted long hair very badly and I was so devastated that I wanted to cry because this meant that no matter how fast my hair grew, it was breaking off just as quickly. It seemed a losing battle. But, fortunately, I'm stubborn. I wouldn't give up on something I really wanted. Also, my hair does grow about 3/4 inch/month, but I tend to trim off around half of that each month. The big thing is to try as hard as you can to protect the ends while being gentle on the scalp. That's when you'll see results!!!
I don't oil my scalp because I believe that it adds nothing to my hair's health in the least. Believe me, when I tell people this, they react like I'd just told them I eat worms for breakfast. I didn't know I was being such a radical. But, my hair hasn't suffered a bit from not using it. It was a waste of money. I'm getting off cheap and I'm still reaping huge benefits!!! (Am I starting to sound like an infomercial or what?) I hope that no one gives in to believing long hair is impossible for them. I was told many times by hair care "specialists" that I couldn't grow long hair because I'm not white. My hair is naturally coarse and phenominally dry, so if I can grow long hair, anybody can! And it's so easy, you have to try these methods to believe it. Success to everybody!!!
I told you that you probably wouldn't believe me when I said that I hardly put anything on my hair. The hair washing routine is pretty much the same as my daily routine. In between washings I simply put some water or a little of the conditioner that came with the Dark and Lovely perm kit on about the last 2 inches of my hair, then I put my hair in my "up do" and go on about my day. And, remember, I'd mentioned using a satin pillowcase at night. Though, I know that some ladies like to use a satin scarf instead. That's good too, but sometimes I toss and turn a little too much for that to stay on.
Yes, my hair is naturally, phenominally dry. But I've found that, dry or not, it's not necessary to have my hair weighed down with a lot of extra chemicals (of course, the perming puts a lot of chems in the hair just by itself). I'd done the grease/oil thing for years and it had absolutely no benefits for my hair except to keep it greasy, heavy and fairly untouchable. But, remember when I'd stated that I use Cream of Nature shampoo/conditioner combo, well it leaves enough of a coating on my hair to keep it from actually looking dry. My ends, however, need the extra coating of conditioner in order to keep them from splitting. I know it's hard to believe, which is why I guess a lot of women still use grease. But, if you try not using it after just one washing, you'll see what I mean! You just might get hooked on the results!!!
Before using the routine I do now, I tried everything I heard of. Scalp massages, brushing vigorously with round-bristled brush, Vitamin E oil massages, magic hair growth grease, hair vitamins from a natural foods store, eating lots of wheat germ, over trimming the ends, etc. Then, I used to actually stop total strangers in the street, or wherever I found women who had longer hair than mine, and I'd interrogate them as to what products they were using, how often they got trims, etc. Some of whom were very helpful and gave whatever advice they could and some, pretty blatantly, didn't want to tell me anything that would make my hair look as good as theirs. So, believe me, I can relate to desperation.
I'm more than glad to tell you how you can order the "Hair Care Handbook", please write to:
ALSIA Co.
P.O. Box 25071
Richmond, VA. 23260-5071
When you write, please be certain to mention the name of that particular handbook because they have others on, i.e. dieting, how to handle stress, etc. It's a cheap pamphlet, only about $2.50, plus a buck for shipping, but it's something that you'll refer to for the rest of your life and it contains information that, I'm sure, you will want to pass on to your friends and relatives.
ALSIA Co. doesn't have a website that I know of. But, yes, I do relax my hair using Dark & Lovely regular strength.
I'm glad to hear that someone can relate. I've had strangers to actually come up and run their hands down the back of my head, without my permission, looking for tracks, just to prove that my hair is fake and you should see their faces when they find it isn't. They end up looking so ridiculous! That's the fun part of those types of encounters!!! It's very difficult convincing other African American ladies that you've managed to accomplish what so many still believe to be impossible for us.
And to all you ladies who are on a long hair quest, please do expect to put up with some strange behavior from people who are curious about your long hair. They will want to run their fingers through it, play with it, have you stand there while they call their friends over to look at it (and play with it), some will have you explain, on the spot, your family heritage to prove that you're not one half or one third white or Native American, and yank your hair a little to see if it hurts (they figure if it's a weave, it won't hurt). It's pretty comical actually, but if you're not used to strangers touching any part of you, you may not think it's so funny at first. Please try and be patient. It's really a kind of flattery!!!
The only thing that concerns me about wearing it is the manipulation of the ends. If there's a way that you can be certain not to snag or tangle and break the ends as you're braiding and to make sure that the ends are in great shape before you begin (trimmed and conditioned). That sounds like a great style to me!
Coincidentally, I'd just re-ordered Wanakee's free guide too. It came within two weeks this time. (I'd let someone borrow the one I did have and they didn't return it.) You might want to call the 800 number and check to make sure they have your correct address. I had to do that the first time too. I do use the "Hair Care Handbook" for ultimate advice, but I like to keep a copy of her guide so that, as mine grows, I can compare it to hers. And, because I like that hairdo on the front cover and I want to copy it, but I need the picture to do it with.
I'm so glad you've found cheaper products that work for you! And, I see you like Creme of Nature. I haven't found a better detangling conditioner yet that doesn't contain alcohol.
By the way, I had to get substantial advice on trims, myself. It was a big setback putting trims off. But, I was phobic about them, having had so many people take off whatever amount they wanted despite my very specific instructions. Now, I do my own hair, everything from retouches to trims (I wash once a week and perm and trim once every four or five weeks depending on how much newgrowth I have).
Of course, I'm super excited because October 31st is the end of my experimental year! HOOOOORRAAAYYYY!!! I get to wear my hair down and measure to see it's full length!!! In about an hour I'm going to be celebrating!!!
And I can hardly wait till next year when you and I and all of the other ladies who have begun their year-long quest for greater hair length will be able to celebrate together!!!
Ladies, whatever you do, do not give up on your quest to grow long hair because when you reach your goal length, it's great!!! I know I should have a more sophisticated way of expressing myself after a year of waiting, but...IT'S JUST GREAT!!!
Ok, let's see, first of all, I didn't go to sleep for thinking about it the night before. Then, I got up early in the morning and washed it and pulled it back to dry naturally, putting an extra amount of conditioner on the ends because I knew I'd be wearing it loose for the first time in so long.
Well, my mother is highly critical of my hair, so I got some rollers together and went to her house. When I got there, I went upstairs and rolled my hair up. It was hot here on Sunday, so my hair dried pretty quickly, but it was still a little damp in the middle, BUT DO YOU THINK THAT STOPPED ME AFTER WAITING A YEAR?!?! I tried to roll my hair up and, you won't believe this, I couldn't do it! I mean, I couldn't do it right away. First, I felt guilty for putting a roller on my hair and potentially causing it stress, then I started to get phobic about the air drying my ends out and I began to imagine my hair falling out...but I kept swinging my hair around and feeling the new heaviness of it and decided, to heck with the phobia stuff...full steam ahead!!! I just had to see what it looked like with curls!!! Then I ran into another problem. Did you know that long hair can't be rolled up as shorter hair can? Well, I didn't. You have to either grow longer arms to go with your longer hair or you have to do what I did, you section your hair, then put the roller close to midway of your hair length of the section and wrap the end around first, then sort of twirled the roller up towards my scalp and, there, it was done! I used very few rollers because I wanted loose curls. I took them out after about 45 minutes and, just swung my hair back and forth (like they do on the commercials). Then, using my fingers, I smoothed the sides a little. No combing (I didn't want to risk snapping the ends), no blow drying, no hot curling. My mother came in on the hair swinging part and went on about how long it had gotten. Well, I knew it must look good then. But, no, I didn't fly to the morror. I sat in front on the edge of her bed and was entertaining all sorts of doubts like maybe it wouldn't look very long with curls in it, or what if it's gotten thinned out somehow or what if it wouldn't react well to the sponge rollers? Because, this was it! I'd told myself in the beginning of this experiment that if changing my hair care habits didn't work after this one year, I'd go back to what I was doing before and just deal with only gaining about a couple of inches a year (if I was fortunate). If this idea wasn't going to work, I was going to have to wait years for my hair to get long. Well, I finally coaxed myself into taking a look. Ladies, I wish you could see it!!! My hair is soooooooooo shiny and healthy looking and thick and heavy and, above all, LONG!!! I have taken the challenge and emerged victorious over all the stereotypes about African American women not being able to grow long hair!!! Oh, I celebrated by, temporarily, coming off of my diet. I ate candy and pizza and pasta and... Then, I went outside with it down and actually had women I didn't know oohing and ahing over my hair. I guess there are women who can tell that it's real after all!!! I felt like a movie star with all the fuss people were making!!! I had a blast and I'm still celebrating!!! MAY EVERYONE BE AS HAPPY AS WITH THEIR HAIR AS I AM!!!!
Sorry, I got so carried away telling what my results were and what I did to celebrate that I didn't catch my typos and I didn't answer the hair trimming question. But, here goes... The only reason I'd started getting trims at all was because I'd heard they would make my hair grow faster. I started trimming my hair myself because I'd gotten frustrated with hair care "professionals" who would take off however much hair they felt like cutting at the time. Yes, CUT, not trim. I believe the most I'd had taken off without permission was 3 inches. Well, before the trim, my hair was just barely past my shoulders at the time and it had taken me years to get that, so I was more than a little angry (so angry, in fact, that the beautician was afraid I would tear her shop apart). Believe me, the longer it gets the easier it is to see because you can see all the ends, even the back. No guessing whether or not you've gotten it even. I section my hair, then I comb down each section as flat to my head as I can, then I run two fingers down a section until I'm holding the end amount that I want to trim. I take off about a centimeter (2.54 cm = 1 inch). After each section is trimmed I put the Dark and Lovely conditioner on the ends so that they are immediately being kept moist. I believe the hardest part of keeping my hair up for a year was each day, resisting the temptation to wear it down. Especially in spring and summer, when a lot of ladies around here show off their new hairdos. Many in my town have weaves or extensions, and when they go flopping their ringlets around, it is tempting to join in the fun. And, being married, I know my husband would love to see me in something other than the "Susan B. Anthony look". He never complains, but I know he'd rather have me curl my hair. But, he also likes it long, so he's pleased with the results of my experiment! I don't want to wear my hair down this winter because the weather is too harsh outside, and the dry heat is too damaging inside. So, I'll be wearing my hair up, probably for the whole winter. But, I urge everyone to resist the temptation to just give up or to go back to wearing your hair down all the time. Once you see the results of persistence, you will never want to go back to the old methods of taking care of your hair! IT IS SOOOOOOO WORTH IT!!! I'M LIVING A DREAM!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR EVERYONE ELSE'S RESULTS!!!
I'm glad you got to see my reply to Susan regarding cornrows. And I'm very much in favor of the use of your naturally grown hair as much as possible when styling, even to the exclusion of the store-bought kind. But, regarding cornrows in general, I believe that as long as you wear a style that requires a minimum of chemicals and heat implements and it keeps your ends safe, it's a good grow-out style. I'm going to keep my hair up until spring. I'm being really cautious about keeping the cold outdoor air and dry indoor heat from causing breakage. But, now that my hair is long, I plan to wear it down for special occasions like Thanksgiving and New Year's and other fun gatherings. For the past year, I'd kept it in a bun, no matter what. I'm going to be careful, but, I plan on having some fun with my hair this year!!!
My hair grows about 3/4 of an inch per month. All told, during the past year I've managed to retain about 9 inches of new growth! I wash my hair once per week (due to time constraints, but I'd rather do it twice per week). Then, I put it in a ponytail while I'm in the shower and let it dry naturally before putting it in a bun. Actually, usually only the ponytail part is completely dry and the rest is still damp when I put it up.
I can relate to your salon horror stories. I've had so many negative experiences with them that I've been doing my own hair for years now.
The little handbook I'd mentioned in previous posts, really did a lot to change the way I care for my hair overall. I'm much more gentle with it now. For example, one of the bits of advice the pamphlet gives is that you should never yank a comb through your hair whether it's wet or dry. Well, I thought that was pretty stupid. I mean, how can I get the tangles out of my hair if I don't yank the comb through. But, I tried it (with the help of a detangler) and, though the comb-out took longer, it made so much difference in reducing the number of split ends I had. If I could narrow hair care down to just one piece of advice, I'd say that you really do have to baby the ends of your hair. If they're not taken care of, you won't see much new growth. That's what I like most about the grow-out year. I'm money-conscious and it was so cheap to get long hair. I'm delirously happy because of that too. I had grown up thinking that only the girls who could afford to go to the salon every couple of weeks could have long hair. ANOTHER MYTH BITES THE DUST! HEY! HEY!
My hair has been permed for about 20 years now. I'm back to using what I started out with after having shifted to several other perms and relaxers, Dark and Lovely regular strength. But, the handbook I'm using said that I should not go perm-hopping. That I should choose a reliable, gentle perm and stick with it. And for the past year, that's what I did. Give it a try!
Now my hair is approx. 3 inches from my waist.
You're right. As long as the ends are in kept in good condition, braids make a good style.
And, yes, leaving my hair alone as much as possible made all the difference. Who would have thought that doing practically nothing could be so rewarding?
I'm glad that you've already chosen a goal length because it'll be all the more exciting as you measure your hair getting closer and closer to that point! I can't wait to read your results!!!
I use Cream of Nature conditioning shampoo to detangle my hair. But, if you use it, please keep your eyes and mouth closed because it will numb your tongue and turn your eyes terribly red. (I know it sounds like common sense, but it wasn't for me, since I wash and comb-out my hair in the shower, usually opening my eyes at every odd sound and opening my mouth to breath) But, despite all this, it detangles like nothing else I've tried.
I know it gets boring sometimes, seeing other ladies wearing the latest hairdo's (this is especially hard for me to deal with in the spring and summer when I usually want to show off with everybody else after wearing hats and caps and hoods all winter long.) And because I'm hair-stylistically challenged, I really get in a rut because the only up-do that I really know how to do well is a bun. But, pleeeeeeease don't get discouraged! Don't give up! Don't be like I used to be, looking in the mirror at my short hair and thinking, "If I had started taking better care of it just six months ago, my hair would be four inches longer by now." Then I'd be mentally kicking myself. I'll tell you what I'd done during my grow-out year to make myself feel better. The only time I could see how much my hair had grown was when I'd take it down to wash it, so each month, right after washing, I'd measure and use every extra millimeter as a reason to celebrate! Then, I'd calculate how much longer it would be by the end of fall, then by the end of winter, etc. It sure made me feel better when I could mentally rack up those inches and remind myself every day of why I had my hair up and why I didn't care what people thought of my Susan B. Anthony look. Now, those people are absolutely in awe when they look at my hair. For me, that's part of the fun of having it long. Seeing the looks on the faces of people who had told me it couldn't be done. Believe me, if you're doing the year long grow-out, when your year is up you'll know exactly what I mean!
I'm 5'3" tall. And, yes, in one year I'd managed to retain more than 8 inches of new growth! And since I'm coming from a past record of only being able to keep about 1 inch, that's why I'm ecstatic!!!
Tell me, what shape are the ends of your hair in? I don't doubt that your hair is growing, but that you don't get to see the results of your new growth because the ends are very damaged. Do you have an excellent trim?
By the way Trevis, I love ponytails!!! But, it's dangerous to wear them because it leaves my ends fully exposed to the wind whipping past.
I still wear them sometimes, but it's usually only for a couple of hours on the weekends and I put extra conditioner on my ends (in fact, sometimes they're actually still wet when I leave the house) so that they can withstand the extra air exposure better.
I relaxed my hair regularly for the entire year I was gaining length, then I put it right back in a bun after the retouches.
IF YOU REALLY WANT LONG HAIR, NEVER GIVE UP!!! You're not pestering me at all. I'm more than glad to help!!!
1)Do you brush your hair?
I really only brush it enough to put it in a bun most mornings. But, I don't brush for scalp stimulation (tried that - it was a no go).
2) Do you take vitamins or just eat healthy?
As a matter of fact, I don't doubt that I have one of the worst diets in the U.S. I don't take vitamins, I skip meals and I don't eat nearly enough fruits and vegetables.
3) How do you keep your bun in place?
I use the small bobby pins. I've tried the big ones, but they just don't seem to stay in place as well.
5)How the heck do you perm your own hair? How long have you been doing that and werent you scared as a turkey at Thanksgiving that you wouldnt get ALL the new growth?
And I've been perming my own hair for about 14 years now. I did make mistakes at first. It took some getting used to. But, I can honestly say that I've never had to problems with my hair falling out when I do my own retouches, as I had when I'd let hairdressers do it for me.
Actually, after I wash my hair, I gently comb it into a ponytail while I'm still in the shower. I think it's because I use a detangling shampoo (my hair would be a tangled mess without one) and because I work with the the flow of water from the showerhead which helps to push my hair backwards as I'm combing the detangling shampoo/conditioner through, that helps me to have a very easy comb-out. I let my hair dry naturally for a while in a ponytail, then I twist it into a bun. In the morning, I just take the bobby pins out, put some conditioner on the ends (my hair is kind of stuck together so that just makes it easier to moisten the ends all together) then I twist it back around and put the bobby pins back in.
I've tried to put bobby pins in my hair while it's wet, but that leads to more breakage because that mean's forcing a metal object past delicate, wet strands of hair. Not good. (I can attest to that, because I've tried it.) My hair is coarse, but I still prefer to wait until the majority of it is air dried before I put it up.
P.S. The handbook Yvette is talking about no longer exists. Someone on another board found this out, so please don't send away for it.
