Abstinence Challenge 365, 24-7

sunshinelove

New Member
Glad to have found some like minded sistahs! Sometimes it feels as if your a foreigner when it comes to celibacy and abstinence! There's power in waiting! I actually started a blog about this as well...celibacyblues.blogspot.com...Don't give up Ladies, as long as we keep our minds on the Lord we will make it!! Praise God!
 
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sunshinelove

New Member
Girrrrl!!! I totally understand what you're going through but if he couldn't wait for you and respect your decisions and equally believe in your decision...He was not the one...But Just trust God, He knows all about the path that you take.
 
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Sosa

Well-Known Member
I'm in :yep:. It's HARD, but I'm shooting to never have premarital sex ever again.
Help me Jesus!
 

sunshinelove

New Member
I was thinking...maybe we could start a monthly/bi-monthly bible study/meeting or something as a support group to us who are doing this abstinence challenge. I think it helps when you are in the company of other like minded individuals. Just a thought!
 
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Ramya

New Member
Hey ladies! I hope everyone is doing will with the challenge. Nothing's changed here except my attitude. :grin: Here are some things that have helped me through the last couple of years.

~Understand that God gives us instruction for a reason. He is not trying to make us miserable and he is not trying to make us miss anything. Please don't go into this kind of challenge thinking that you are missing something.

~You are not going to wake up one day and stop liking sex and sexual activities. It doesn't happen like that. It is a process that involves doing things on purpose. You can't will your way celibate. :nono: The bible says that strongholds can't stand against HIS word. It didn't say anything about YOUR word. Speak His word and confess it over your life daily.

~Don't get comfortable.
Do not put yourself in questionable situations. You don't have to go into his house and he doesn't have to be in yours. You can enjoy each other's company away from the house. Don't act like yall don't know why. :rolleyes:. Be smart yall. If you're not in the position for something to happen, nothing will. Remember you can't will your way celibate.

~Don't play. :look: Keep the touching and kissing PG. What's the point of getting 'hot' if you are trying to remain pure? That doesn't make sense at all. Even if you don't fail then, you will lust for him in your mind which will lead to failure. Guard your hands and your thoughts. --don't say I didn't tell yall that.

~Be honest with God. He knows what you're doing anyway. If the Holy Spirit came to live in you, who do you think is between you and old boy when all this stuff is going down? Yep the Holy Spirit. :barf: And the bible clearly states that we are not to grieve the Holy Spirit. But that's exactly what you're doing.

~Be honest with yourself. Remind yourself why you are celibate. It's a good thing remember...

~Address any issues that you may have. Is physical intimacy filling a void in your life? Are you using this man/these men? Really dig deep and find out the real reasons you have sex. Remember that you were freed from bondage the minute you accepted God.

Do not be deceived.
1 Corinthians 6:9-11
9 Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

AND

11 That is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.


You are not your past and it's not too late! Once God has forgiven you, forgive yourself! It's done and over with. Look forward and keep on going. :yep:

Be blessed yall. :kiss:
 

Duchesse

Well-Known Member

~Don't get comfortable.


~Don't play.

~Be honest with God.

~Address any issues that you may have.


I needed to read this Ramya......you ain't neva lied about the above. It's a slippery, slippery, slope, and I almost slid on right off. :nono:

......woosah.....
 

Renewed1

Well-Known Member
So far so good for me. Even though, I don't have a BF now it is still hard.

Especially around my period the desires are so hard to control.
 

nubiangoddess3

Well-Known Member
I want to join, 'Im not a Christian or religious but I do feel and believe that sex is something to cherish and be done in marriage
 

natural in ATL

15+ years natural
Joining the challenge! Not a virgin, but God knows I have a heart for Him and I will show it with not just words, but actions!! Was in a long term relationship and we had our ups and downs in terms of engaging or abstaining from intercourse. We were both in church and it was a horrible feeling going together on Sunday knowing what had gone down the week prior. The longest we went without it was probably 3-4 months. So now that we're not together (although I should have had the strength for this challenge before now) my mind is clear and I'm able to see with long-term vs. short-term vision.

BTW - just when I was making this decision... how about an ex (not my long term guy, someone else) sent me a text saying he wanted to get together to talk about "us" (we broke up b/c I wouldn't have a physical relationship with him)..NOT!!

Be blessed ladies and thanks in advance for the support! :thankyou:

Quick update...since March I have been dating and there was a strong pressure placed on me by a guy I had been seeing pretty consistently. I decided that it was not meant to be because God wouldn't have me end up with someone who was not respectful of my decision to WAIT. I stopped seeing him and met someone new in June. Ladies, I must say this is the only man I've ever met who I'm completely comfortable with, completely in love with and completely trust!! AND we've already had "the talk" and he wants to wait until marriage. By the way, he didn't just agree with me...he actually put it out there first so I know he's not just trying to act like he's down with my plan! Pressure's off - now all I have to do is keep my mind focused on God and be the best person I can be. God is so GOOD!! :grin:
 

fyb87

New Member
Quick update...since March I have been dating and there was a strong pressure placed on me by a guy I had been seeing pretty consistently. I decided that it was not meant to be because God wouldn't have me end up with someone who was not respectful of my decision to WAIT. I stopped seeing him and met someone new in June. Ladies, I must say this is the only man I've ever met who I'm completely comfortable with, completely in love with and completely trust!! AND we've already had "the talk" and he wants to wait until marriage. By the way, he didn't just agree with me...he actually put it out there first so I know he's not just trying to act like he's down with my plan! Pressure's off - now all I have to do is keep my mind focused on God and be the best person I can be. God is so GOOD!! :grin:

God is Good!

I did come in here to join this challenge. Being that I am divorced with a son I'm not a virgin! I will say that being celibate really helps to eliminate men that may be only looking for one thing more quickly. Because I usually tell them this upon our initial conversation. I don't want to even waste my time going on a few dates with someone to try and ease it into a conversation. Of course, it is a let down when someone lets me know that is not something they believe. But, I appreciate the honesty.

I'm glad I found this thread as the only support I have is my mom and my brothers. And uh....it's a little difficult to talk to my brothers about this sort of thing or have them talk to me. Don't get me wrong I've done it as we try to support one another, but I am DEFINITELY apreciative to have found another option!!:lachen:
 

nubiangoddess3

Well-Known Member
Ladies... My year of abstaining just went out the window, I should have known better, but the past is the past and I'm starting all over and be more careful this time
 

Raspberry

New Member
I've been having trouble abstaining in my thoughts lately - purity in the mind is just as important as purity in the body. I feel much more balanced and open to hearing God's voice when I have self-control over my thought life. I'm glad there's a place we can discuss these things because it's hard for Christian women in real life to be honest about their sex lives or lust issues. Lets pray for each other ladies :)
 

CosmopolitanChic

New Member
Ladies be encouraged!!!

It can be done, and I know it gets hard sometimes.

It amazes me how people around you think something is wrong with you becuase you want to wait.

There is so much of a focus on sex, sex, these days.

I have a friend that told me the other day, that my focus should be on finding a husband. I politely told her" He that findeth a wife finds a good thing". Whomever he is, I should be his focus. Word:grin:

I can wait, Sarah waited a long time for Issac. When she became impatient she made a mess of things.

Lets all encourage each other to wait.

I have become so caught up in the Entertainment Thread that I have missed my focus entirely. Thats ok I will do better.

Thanks for sharing your stories.
 

Ramya

New Member
Ladies be encouraged!!!

It can be done, and I know it gets hard sometimes.

It amazes me how people around you think something is wrong with you becuase you want to wait.

There is so much of a focus on sex, sex, these days.

I have a friend that told me the other day, that my focus should be on finding a husband. I politely told her" He that findeth a wife finds a good thing". Whomever he is, I should be his focus. Word:grin:

I can wait, Sarah waited a long time for Issac. When she became impatient she made a mess of things.

Lets all encourage each other to wait.

I have become so caught up in the Entertainment Thread that I have missed my focus entirely. Thats ok I will do better.

Thanks for sharing your stories.

I'm glad you brought the bold up. I get so impatient (like now) that I wanted to do something like push things along. See God gave me a glimpse of my husband a while back. We've met and it's been almost a year and nothing! And I'm over here like umm... :look::ohwell:. LOL I guess I'll continue with my hands off approach and see what God is trying to do. :perplexed
 

CosmopolitanChic

New Member
I'm glad you brought the bold up. I get so impatient (like now) that I wanted to do something like push things along. See God gave me a glimpse of my husband a while back. We've met and it's been almost a year and nothing! And I'm over here like umm... :look::ohwell:. LOL I guess I'll continue with my hands off approach and see what God is trying to do. :perplexed

Have you started socailizing?
 

akilijata

New Member
Recently I had to break it off with a guy I had been seeing. We were gong overboard and the guilt was hell! I had to remind myself Whose I was and let him go! Although I miss him, I know that waiting on God is the better thing for my life. I definitely will not be placing myself in that kind of situation ever again. I thank God for His forgiveness. I'm good now ya'al! Giving away your body to a man who isn't your husband is NEVER worth it!
 

Renewed1

Well-Known Member
I'm still holding on, I've been celibate for over 4 years now. It's getting REALLY tough., considering I'm not a virgin. But I'm controlling those urges, for when God does send my husband. I won't THROW myself at him.
 

Sunshine77

Active Member
Changed. Im with you. I have also been cleibate for 4 years. I wanted to wait till marriage but I gave in. Ive tried this several times in the past and gave in after a couple of years. This time I going to make it.
 

kboogie007

Member
I wanna join too...end of August I made 13 months. I must say it has not been hard for me...should I say as yet...but the reason for that may be because I haven't really been interacting with too many guys. I am so happy I made this committment.
 

Vonnieluvs08

Well-Known Member
I made this commitment to myself and God over a week ago and now I want to make it in front of others. I know that this will be a hard road but seeing that i'm letting God work on me and make me renewed in his image and spirit I will be okay. I have cut a lot of ppl out of my life and told many that I am no longer dating. I know that God will send me my husband when we are all ready (God, him, and me). Repenting for my sin and living and walking in the spirit is what drives me.
 

natural in ATL

15+ years natural
I'm still holding strong. Ladies, please pray for me - my boyfriend is coming to visit for Labor Day weekend and I want to make sure we stay on track. We're both committed to waiting until marriage and we talked about it again this week in preparation for his visit, so I think we'll be fine. But I always feel better/stronger knowing others are praying for my success. I'll check in after the weekend to share the good news that we made it through without deviating from our plan!! :yep:
 
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