How did your Mom look after your hair as a child???

How did your Mom handle your hair?

  • She was gentle and meticulous and it grew reasonably long

    Votes: 25 30.1%
  • She was gentle and meticulous and it was reasonably short and stayed the same length

    Votes: 1 1.2%
  • She did the best she could and made some mistakes but it was resonable long

    Votes: 26 31.3%
  • She did the best she could but made mistakes and it was short and stayed the same length

    Votes: 18 21.7%
  • She was rough with my hair and it often looked a hot mess!

    Votes: 13 15.7%

  • Total voters
    83

love2alicia

Member
This thread isn't about dogging out your family members lol! Its just about the reality of how well your hair was looked after as a child and the length of your hair in relation to that.

I bring this up because I turned to my Mum recently to braid my hair because when I do it back towards the front it ends up looking like Medusa:( so I asked my Mum to do my hair.
First of all when I took my hair out my Mum was demanding to know what I put in my hair for it to grow. I told her looking after my ends and moisturizing, she was like "say what!", needless to say I gave up trying to explain at the point.

Then she begins to comb my hair FROM ROOT TO TIP, all memories from my hairy childhood came back to me as I heard the snap, crackle and pop of the comb:lol: . Not to say I had bad memories of getting my hair done as a youngster, at the time I thought that was normal and so did my Mum. She then proceeded to braid my hair very tightly (although neatly) to my head, not the tightest Ive ever had it but my forhead was stretched and it was painful at bedtime.

On the advice of the ladies on here I took it out as it was hurting on one side a bit and I looked up the effects of tightly braided hair on the net.

As I said this isnt a bashing thread because many Black women are not privvy to good hair information and consequently make mistakes sometimes. My mother was also a single parent so time was of the essence but she did her best although my hair didn't grow much.

How did your Mother care for your hair as a child and how long did it grow???

If you are now a mother how do look after your childs hair and how well is it growing after becoming more privvy to hair knowledge???
 
Last edited:
I think some women just don't know how to look after their children's natural hair because all they've known is relaxed hair themselves or constantly hide it away under a weave and don't look after the hair underneath.

A lot of black women are in a very sad place and have been there for a very long time when it comes to haircare - especially natural haircare - and we need to get back to our roots.

How did your Mother care for your hair as a child and how long did it grow???

My Mother's hair has mostly been natural all of her life. Sometimes she would relax it but only twice a year. It has never been shorter than shoulder length.
She looked after my hair by washing every two weeks, using a conditioner, whilst damp applied oil to my scalp and combed through. She then put my hair into individual plaits. I never knew my hair short until i begged her for a relaxer and it all went belly up. Now i have 6 inches of natural hair and am determined to get all that length back.

Herself, my Mother has BSL length natural hair and she is my inspiration. How does she care for her hair? The same way she used to care for mine - she keeps it simple.

If you are now a mother how do look after your childs hair and how well is it growing after becoming more privvy to hair knowledge???


I have a son and have kept his hair short - this is due to him having eczema on his scalp.
 
Last edited:
my mother has type 1 hair, and so do most of her siblings, so she was unsure of what products to use on my hair. However, my hair was cainrowed and braided most of the time, which really helped to retain length. I think the longest my hair was is waistlength, until my mother started to relax it, and it started to break off
 
My mother looked after my hair pretty well when I was younger and retained some good length for me. I didn't vote because I wouldn't say she was 'gentle' but she developed a good routine that grew my hair. She would wash once a week somtimes once every two weeks. Followed by a greasing of the scalp and a blow dry. She'd part my hair into sections and braid my hair. when my hair was relaxed I'd always have rollersets which she'd comb out into a pony. Other times I'd ben in corn rows or extensions.
 
My mom would do my hair (cornrows/relaxers) and forget about it for a long period of time, so I always looked jacked up. My aunt,however, always took the time to style my hair and make me look cute. She was also gentle whereas my mom was very rough.
 
my hair thrived when my mom did it. it was natural, thick and at least bra strap. she would was i would say every 2-3 weeks. grease with sulfur 8 and braid it up or style it ponytails. she never braided real tight. so my hair thrived.
 
My mom did a good job, but I HATED with a passion having my hair done. She'd wash my hair like twice a week and then grease it with DAX :( around the edges and Ultra Sheen (the green one :D )on the rest of the hair, and then would proceed to braid it up into a really nice style or braid it hanging down with beads on the ends :)

....but I have to ask this and it's not dogging I swear...lol. Was my mother the only one who would keep a strap around her neck to beat my behind if I kept on mixin' around in the chair? :( She only ever stung my legs a few times.
 
Last edited:
My mother did the best that she could and my hair and that of my sisters was reasonably long. Mom has almost completely straight, just barely wavy hair and our thick curls and waves were totally foreign to her. My Dad had no idea about doing hair either, and although he tried, Mom was much better.:lol:

We had our hair brushed, root to tip , every morning with Vaseline added and then braided in one or two braids. I despised my hair then, it was about waist length when stretched but I just wanted straight hair that didn't have to be pulled and brushed so hard to get the tangles out. I didn't care at all about length.
 
my mother and grandmother would put TONS of grease in my hair because I had/have hair that gets very dry. plus she would comb my 4b tightly coiled hair with a small tooth comb.:perplexed so it's no wonder my hair never made it past ear length as a child. i got teased sooo much back then about my hair. and even to this day my mom always tells me to put grease in my hair im like yeah ok:look: it wasnt until i got braids and used a braid spray moisturizer every day that i went to neck length. now im aiming for shoulder then APL.
oh and my hair would get washed pretty infrequently.

i really want to know where this idea came about that black people need to use grease. i have a friend (RIP Quana) who did nothing but use grease and stretch her perms and her hair was full APL. but for me it's pure garbage and i wouldnt tell anyone to use it and if I had kids my daughters i would NEVER use grease on their hair.
 
Last edited:
my hair hardly got washed, tons of grease, and i always had to wear ponytails. my hair was long but she used to use a bristle brush on my hair and that cause split ends which broke off my hair since she never trimmed it.

then she started giving me perms and my hair would break off badly. i think for the longest time i only had shoulder length hair because of the relaxer

her hair was long and grew fast (she had a texturizer) my hair was just a big "i don't know whats wrong" situation.
 
My mom always took good care of my hair. She didn't use the best products looking back , but my hair was always in cute cornrows, and even if it was down it had that swang, and the longest my hair got was a little longer than midback.
Until I started doing my hair on my own it was always thick, but when I started going to school with white people, I wanted thinner hair. I used to get teased b/c my hair was so thick. So she started leaving the perms on longer, to appease me, and I used to use heat everyday, eventhough she'd tell me not to. So it started breaking, then I got a really bad color at a salon that was for white people, and I had to cut my hair super short like ear length to get the health back. But she'll tell you even now that she told me so.:ohwell:
 
my mom was great at doing my hair, I wish I could have her look after it again. She would wash and condition once a week (usually on Sundays) plait it in about 10 or more braids and send me outside to play to let it airdry. During the week when my scalp was dry she would grease it with dax or sulpher 8. And then she would style in anywhere from one to 10 or more ponytails. Always with a "bo-bo" twisted and a barette at the end.
 
My mom relaxed our hair early because she did not know what to do with natural hair. She could not cornrow, so she did what she thought was best. She washed it about every 2 weeks and re-did our ponytails daily with water and a brush. She was not rough but she did not like grease and at that time there was not a lot of non-grease moisturizers on the market like there is now. Our hair was just dry. My hair grew a bit and was SL for a while before I started doing it myself (the 5th grade hair debacle most of use go through), then it returned to neck length.
 
My mom use to wash it every Sunday, grease it and braid it. When my poor dad had to do my hair he use to GREASE the heck out of my hair and leave it in two ponytails unbraided. He had me looking a hot mess. It was long though.... until I convinced my mom to perm my hair and it all broke off.
 
I had mid back length hair for the longest time until my mom decided to cut it. She made lots of mistakes but my hair was strong and dealth with it well.

Before the relaxer she relied on three things Blue Magic, a hard bristle brush and water. She washed it once a month then styled it in 6-8 ponytails that she saturated with blue magic then braided them up. At night she would take off the hair bows and let me go to sleep. In the morning she would whip out the brush and water and brush the base of each pony into submission and put the hair bows back on. She did not restyle until wash day.

Once I reached mid back she got tired of dealing with the hair and gave me a relaxer. My hair stayed fairly long until I started cutting in it myself. By the time I was in fifith grade I handled my own hair, those were the mane N tail days. LOL
 
Honestly my mom was bad with my hair. She put me a relaxer in at an early age. She also would use tons of gel and grease and my hair would be super hard and itchy. My mother would put tracks in my hair when I was in middle school and my hair would be super tight. She really didn't know what she was doing because her hair was almost none existent. My hair has recovered though. My grand mother took me to a great hair dresser and they hooked me up. It got healthier and then I stopped going to the hair dresser and my hair stopped and when I learned how to wrap that was my best friend as well as petroleum grease grew it out and I moved back in with my mother and it came back out and I had to start going back to the beautician and it grew back out and I am where I am now. The longest it has gotten is to my shoulders I think but it didn't stay there long. I think that my problem is consistency
 
Last edited:
Actually my mother didn't take care of my hair at all. She has always worn her hair in a short natural fro so she just didn't care about hair.

I have an older sister and she did the best she could. She would cornrow my hair and we'd get it washed every 2 weeks but she was just a kid too. Only 3 years older than me. So as a result BOTH of our hair suffered. My grandmother would do it every now and then. GOSH I hated that straightening comb... Been burnt more times than I care to remember.

I remember when I got my first relaxer. I was SO happy. My mother was PISSED but it's not like she was doing anything with my hair anyway. So my hair has NEVER really flourished until a few years ago when I joined this board and really learned how to take care of it. It's funny that I wound up natural like my mom but I'm still working on getting it as long as a I possibly can.
 
My hair has been relaxed since I was three years old. I asked my mom why did she relax my hair so early, and she said because she couldn't get it to grow when I was natural, and even when she put a texturizer in my hair. I guess she didn't know how to care for it while I was natural. She said it started to grow out more once she relaxed it. She used to wash and condition it every two weeks. I remember this spray moisturizer by Soft N Free that she used in my sister and my hair when I was five or six years old. She sprayed our hair everyday with this moisturizer, and put it into ponytails. Our hair grew pretty long, and my hair has never been above apl since. However, the big problem I've been having with my hair lately is shedding which is making it thinner..
 
My Mom would put my hair in ponytails every morning before school. In the summer, she would have my aunt cornrow it and put those hideous beads with aluminum foil on the ends!:eek: Hey, it was the 80's.

Later, when I started getting relaxed my Mom would actually BLAME me, say I didn't take care of my hair and that's why my perms "didn't last". The not lasting that she was speaking of? That was my NEW GROWTH. I honestly believed that for years too.:(

I have forgiven her for that though because I realize that she just didn't know any better.:ohwell:
 
My mother used Nexxus products on my hair my entire childhood until I left for college. I didn't even know there were other brands of poo. :lachen:
 
My mom did a pretty good job in caring for my hair. She would wash it once a week with a regular shampoo, deep condition it once or twice a month using queen helene cholesterol, and she would use ultra sheen hair grease on my hair and scalp (the blue green one) , then she would braid it or twist it up for the rest of the week, occasionally she would press it out and sometimes make those cute shirley temple curls. Even when she started relaxing my hair it still was in good condition, and the longest it grew was to MBL. :)
 
Energist said:
My mom did a good job, but I HATED with a passion having my hair done. She'd wash my hair like twice a week and then grease it with DAX :( around the edges and Ultra Sheen (the green one :D )on the rest of the hair, and then would proceed to braid it up into a really nice style or braid it hanging down with beads on the ends :)

....but I have to ask this and it's not dogging I swear...lol. Was my mother the only one who would keep a strap around her neck to beat my behind if I kept on mixin' around in the chair? :( She only ever stung my legs a few times.

lol thats funny.. my mom would hit me on the head with the comb when I started to get friggity

eta: in relation to my childhood hair care.. I would get it washed probably every 2-4 weeks, washed conditioned, blow dried, greased with DAX. My mom would style it in braids, cornrows, ponytails and stuff. At bed time my mom would plait it in about 8 plaits and took them under (ya know you gta protect that ends lol)
 
Last edited:
Let me just put it this way....Thank GOD my mother only gave birth to ONE daughter (I have 5 brothers). Her haircare/stylist abilities were (and still are) non-existant! :rolleyes:
 
How did your Mother care for your hair as a child and how long did it grow???
Actually Moms washed my hair once a yr in the summer:confused: . She blowdried it with the brush looking dryer. It would overheat and we would have to wait until it cooled! Then, weekly we got our hair brushed and scalp oiled with mineral oil. She cover the brush with a stocking to "catch" the lint, etc. Our hair was crazy long though...

If you are now a mother how do look after your childs hair and how well is it growing after becoming more privvy to hair knowledge???
I can't wait nearly that long with my babys hair. I used to try for month to mimic something close to my hair regimen growing up. Nope, her lil scalp needs weekly cleansing...its too thick for anything less. I use infusium and water and vatika oil for almost every style after I wash. I try my dangdest to limit the heat in her hair but her stepmom is a "straight hair" lover....
 
I went to the salon with my mom every week. During the summer I usually had box braids with extensions. Sometimes my mom would do my hair herself.
 
The main thing my momma did was keep my hair well moisturized. The only thing I don't do now that she did was oil my scalp. I think all the ladies in my fam and some of you out there too :) have learned that this is not a necessary process as we once thought it to be.
 
all I remember is being in the kitchen having my hair pressed with a super hot comb almost everyday. lots of grease and burned hair on the floor. *sniffle*
 
My mom had type 2 hair and she had no idea what to do with my hair. She straightened it after every wash--I guess that made it more manageable, and back in the 60's/70's that was the thing to do.

She passed the torch over to me around 8-10 years old which resulted in extreme damage.

As a mom, I took very good care of my daughters' hair. So much so that my 22 year old still wants me to do her hair :lol:
 
my hair was pressed and in french braids most of the time. Or I had puffs. She did ok, nothing to complain about. She believed in grease though and thought that moisturized the hair. She still thinks like that. When I try to get her to moisturize and seal properly she gives me the gas face. I didn't get a relaxer until I was around 10 or 11 I think.
 
Back
Top