I have heard that some detangle why its dry so that it will be better to detangle when wet , does your hair still tangle up when it wet even though you detangling when it dry?
Nope, because it doesn't have any shed hair caught in it to cause problems and because when wet I make sure to keep it held in braids to stop it from shrinking up and knotting up.
And the ones that detangling and braid, do your hair feel all the way clean while washing in braids and are all of you natural that do this because I don't know how a relaxed hair person can keep the braid in without it unraveling?
Yes I'm natural, and I do undo the braids and rebraid throughout the wash, but even if I didn't undo, my braids get loose and open up a bit when wet providing gaps for dirt and stuff to flow out. I compare this to washing clothes: you don't need to take fibers apart to get them clean. But if you knew my
washing in braids regimen, then you'd see why I don't ever get tangles. Since my regimen involves undoing during the wash, I don't think the unraveling of relaxed hair would really be a problem. I'd turn the braids into bantu knots to keep sections I'm not working on out of the way, or use clips/bands to hold the ends.
And what's the best detangler for a relaxed head that 11 almost 12 weeks post?
No idea. I've never used a detangler. When I was relaxed, I used to part my hair into small sections and comb them from base to ends so my hair was always free of tangles. When I had growth, I found keeping my new growth soft made this regimen of combing through a breeze. Back then I used Paltas. If I were relaxed how, I'd probably use S Curl. If you prevent tangles from coming to be in the first place, there'll be no need for detangling. I've only detangled my hair once since I joined the forum and that was after going to bed with loose hair w/o any product in it. I detangled next day using conditioner on bare hair and finger combed.
Is it still mane and tail?
To me that sounds like some sticky, hardening stuff that will not make detangling easy...but I am not relaxed so I'll sit down before I hurt myself.
Because this is the longest I have stretched and the detangling is getting crazy and I'm looking for something to help me out. I know it's ok to loose a hundred hairs a day but not by breakage! I have little to no patience, I know I must have patience but someone just help me out, thanks in advance 
I think wide-tooth combs are the debil. They do not help you comb properly through your new growth and so you aren't able to remove shed hair properly and methinks that's the cause of your tangles. And I'm not suggestion you rake a fine tooth comb through a mass of hair. Once you find a product that softens your new growth to make it easy to comb, apply that product they way you relax. Part a small section and smooth the product through. Do that to all your sections. If you need to baggy to make it marinate and work its magic, do so. Then now part those small sections at a time again and comb through with a FINE-TOOTH comb. As you finish each section, twist bantu-knot style and clip it out of the way. When all are done, then you can use a regular comb (the wide-tooth if you must) and run it through your hair. Do this on the weekend and enjoy an easy week.
I think people get overwhelmed when they let shed hair stay trapped in there for so long instead of taking it out daily. And actually if you like braid-outs, then after combing through as I described in the previous paragraph, braid your hair. The good thing about this is it stretches your new growth and so keeps it somewhat open so that shed hair will come out easily. But also the braids keep hair in a state of being detangled...so that even when you do the braid-out, your hair still hangs in a detangled state...and in the evening, you can rebraid it again to keep it from being tangled.
Since I believe natural 4B hair SHOULD be braided up or twisted or banded every night to keep tangles at bay, then I do feel that if you are stretching a relaxer, you should practice this habit too.
...smh I had all these knots in my hair and combing my soaking wet relaxed hair to get the tangles out I noted soo much breakage.. I didnt know whether I should pull out a fine tooth comb or keep going with my wide tooth comb or to use a paddle brush
