Why'd You Go Natural?? Why Are You Relaxing??

[wyldcurlz]

i want to know why the naturals are natural - especially those who had beautiful, healthy relaxed hair and then decided to go natural.

i'd also like to know why some of you naturals are texlaxed/texturized or relaxed? especially those of you who are texlaxed/texturized. why?? why not just wear it natural?

here's why i'm asking...i'm fed up with my hair. i'm sick of buns and ponytails and i cannot seem to get a nice uniform look when i wear it curly. and i know i look best with my hair down and straight or wavy.

so, after consulting with a "weave expert" today and another stylist last week, i'm almost convinced i should relax or texturize my virgin hair. but, when i had a relaxer over 10yrs ago - my hair did not thrive. then again, i probably didn't know how to take care of it. i'm really scared of the idea of relaxing, so i'd like to hear some convincing arguments on both sides.

i don't know if its worth it. all i know is that i'm sick of having crazy hairline frizz post workouts and i hate having to run to the salon when i want a nice, straightened look for a date or an evening out. i wanna look cute everyday.

so what to do - texlax or not? (and how does the texlax work? how is the application different from relaxer application?)

 

[prettypuff1]

i was natural..It was 4b last year.. now it is 3c for some reason.. now i wish i wouldnt had gone back to relaxing... But transitioning took so long and cost me alot. I may try it again once i get to a certain length. I was natural until Nov06.... I wish i woulda found yall then and not given up so soon. I may try it again and get me a puff

 

[missnappylady]

I went natural completely by mistake. I forgot to relax my hair for 5 mths (kept wearing braids). Now i'm going into my 3rd year (nov).

 

[bklynLadee]

I decided to go natural because the perm was eating my hair up! I can't stand it anymore. I am not completely natural as of yet. But I am transitioning. If you are thinking of having a perm...I dunno, I want to say don't do it but I don't know your "natural" struggle. I don't think I would ever relax again because it can be very damaging. I know that while being natural I wont have to deal with two different textures and no fear of demarcation.

HTH

 

[*Happily Me*]

after transitioning for 7 months i found that I could not comb my hair. i decided to texlax and i now have the best of both worlds.

 

[Divine Inspiration]

I would suggest you read these threads:

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121334&highlight=natural+lyfe

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121428

There are some perspectives on both sides, and from my observations, it seems to be a matter of preference and what's easiest for the individual. My reasons for being texlaxed are in one of those threads.

HTH

Oh yeah, are you coming to the meet up on May 12?!?!?!?

 

[Cheleigh]

I would suggest you read these threads:

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121334&highlight=natural+lyfe

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121428

There are some perspectives on both sides, and from my observations, it seems to be a matter of preference and what's easiest for the individual. My reasons for being texlaxed are in one of those threads.

ITA. At the end of the day, it's really an individual decision.

I always have a variety of reasons I went natural (and I had pretty "healthy" relaxed hair), but one of the main reasons was simply one of reliance. I don't like to rely on much. So for me, no matter how long I stretched, what potions or concoctions I used, there was going to come a point that I need to have a retouch. I didn't want that anymore. I like being in total control of my own good hair days. I know that I can take some water, conditioner, gel, and twists, and have a good (or at least decent) hair day. I don't need to schedule nothing with nobody regarding my hair (now, if I can translate that to pedicures and eye brow arching, I'd be totally self-sufficient).

But then again, I'm not one of those women who are/need to be perfectly groomed, so I'm totally cool with my hair looking a little frizzy (or a lot).

 

[wyldcurlz]

MAY 12th??? Divine, please PM me. I searched on the meeting board, but couldn't find anything about a May 12th so-Cal meet-up. I'd love to go, so please give me the details.

and thanks for those links. i'll check them out. i feel so lost and kinda sad about all of this. i know that's a little heavy, but i know the LHCF women will understand (we all take our hair care and hair health seriously.) i've got a lot to consider. thanks again for the links to those threads. i'll check 'em out.

I would suggest you read these threads:

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121334&highlight=natural+lyfe

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=121428

There are some perspectives on both sides, and from my observations, it seems to be a matter of preference and what's easiest for the individual. My reasons for being texlaxed are in one of those threads.

HTH

Oh yeah, are you coming to the meet up on May 12?!?!?!?

 

[dimpalz]

Hi Wyldcurlz! I went natural because I have fine hair. It was growing and the stylist was cutting it off so I decided to take charge. That, and I saw a pic of a lady with BSL fine hair and realised it wasn't for me. I don't want to sound mean but it just looked a bit rubbish, we all imagine ourselves at BSL with DLewis' hair or Lauren's hair or Sareca's or any of the luscious heads, but in truth they're the minority. Once I realised that I decided that if I wanted long hair it'd have to be the natural way. I have a long list of more reasons in my fotki welcome page too, the reasons are endless.

Now if I had those lovely ladies hair that I mentioned above, dont think I wouldn't be swishing and swaying my relaxed, blowdried, straightened, serumed hair from dawn til dusk! But I don't so I work with what I got and it's going good. The back is the longest it's been since I can remember and maybe in my life! It's only about 5 inches but years of ponytails in relaxed hair and overzealous combing whilst relaxing take their toll, ya know.

For you I'd recommend some type of corrective chemical. I know people like you whole long for uniformity and who have had great results texlaxing. I wouldn't say texturise because if you're type 3 you're already practically there. Talk to a good stylist they should be able to help but if you're gonna do it yourself start make sure to add conditioner and oils and start with the most curly/coarsest parts and work real fast because you can end up BONE straight in as little as 10 minutes.

I just reread the last part of ur post - The difference between texlaxing and relaxing is the application time and strength. There's no real difference between being texlaxed and underprocessed except for the intention. Most texlaxers seem to use a relaxer they just leave them on for a shorter time and/or add conditioner and/or oils to the relaxer to condition and reduce the strength and they never "smooth" so they don't end up with bone straight hair. http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=119200&highlight=texlax I found that thread for reference. HTH

 

[TemiLnd]

I have been having this debate with myself since the start of the year. I am a relaxed 4b and I want to go back to being natural. I finally decided that I will reach my goal length of BSL as a relaxed head – have it for a while – 1 or 2 years; then go natural and grow it to BSL, deal with that for 1 or 2 years.
Then I can see which I prefer and make a life decision…

When I had natural hair – 10 years, it was very hard to manage and my dad always blow dried it for me. All I ever did with it was put it in a pony or in braids. Anything so I wudnt deal with my hard hair. So I relaxed it for manageability but I found that I was naïve and didn’t really know how to take care of relaxed hair. My hair broke etc…In 2006 I decided to start growing it and looking after it. Now that I have so much knowledge, my relaxed her is thriving.

 

[BrockStar]

My reasoning is totally superficial erplexed I just love the look of big, curly, natural hair. The shininess, healthiness, and other benefits were all just pluses to me. I had tried to achieve this look by twistouts on my relaxed hair(which was very healthy), but it was not the same. Now I am on my transitioning journey and I can't wait to work my natural hair!!

 

[Divalicious]

I stopped relaxing because I didn't have any good reasons to continue. My hair didn't break off from relaxers or anything. I just wanted to see my natural hair.

 

[glamazon386]

I was just tired of having thin relaxed hair. I was only relaxing 2-3 times a year. I was keeping it braided and weaved up all the time in curly and wavy styles (I rarely wore my hair straight). I realized that I was paying hundreds of dollars for big curly weaves when I could just grow my own big curly hair for free. So I figured what the hell why not go natural? And that's how my hair ended up on the bathroom floor one day...

 

[neenzmj]

I decided to go natural for several reasons:

1. I was tired of battling against my natural texture. Even when I got relaxers, it seemed that my natural curl pattern would come peeking through in a matter of a couple of weeks.

2. I had to decide what was best for my hair after workouts: sweating out my straight style and constantly applying heat to redo it or going natural and opting for styles that didn't require heat, resulting in a healthier head of hair.

3. I hated getting relaxers, whether self-relaxed or otherwise. I have no patience for sitting in a salon ALL day and giving up money I could be using elsewhere. And because my hair is now chemical-free, I'm not bound to scheduling retouches, etc.

Being natural has given me the best of both worlds. When I want to go straight, I do a roller-set and flat iron. Once I get my "straight fix" and I want my curls back, I can simply stick my head under the shower and my curls return in an instant! What more could I ask for?

 

[nikkivale]

I'm going natural because of the versatility of my natural hair.
From my experience being relaxed and natural, natural hair is stronger and I can do more with it.
I always have bad relaxer experiences and when you relax its permanent.
I hate having to fight 2 textures in between relaxers, i can't even enjoy my relaxed hair for long because of my growth.
I like the feel of full thick hair and relaxers seem to just rob the character out of my hair

 

[STLCoverGirl]

I went natural because I could not afford to go to a salon at the time and have a relaxer professionally done. I was doing my own relaxers and I was terrible at it. My hair was super thin and broken.

I knew I could get my hair just as straight with it natural with a lot less breakage. I never intended to wear my hair curly, but that was an added bonus.

 

[bravenewgirl87]

1. I don't like how limp my hair is when it is relaxed. I have a head full with hair, but you wouldn't know that unless you were my stylist.
2. I love the look of natural hair. I am always wearing braided natural styles anyway.
3. No offense to anyone:
Although I do agree that relaxed hair is easier to maintain, but i just feel the concept of putting chemicals on my hair is unncessarily cruel. I know that other people torture their hair, but i don't think that it is as damaging it as relaxers. And i believe god gave us a hair that is so unique and beautiful... why change that?

 

[bLackButtaFly]

I went natural originally because I was in college, broke, and was going almost 6 months between perms. Then I feel in love with my natural texture and the kinks and coils, and I've been hooked ever since.

 

[imstush]

I've been going through this back and forth since HS. I would only relax 1-2 times a year. Then I bumped it to 6-8 weeks in college, then I got highlights (bleached). Ever since college my relaxed hair only stayed one length and started thinning. Each time I transitioned and went natural I always let someone talk me into getting a relaxer. "your hair would be easier to manage if it was relaxed, or the blowdrying isn't healthy just relax your hair". So each time I went and got a relaxer. Unfortunately the last time I relaxed in 2005, after not relaxing in 3 years I wound up with a bald spot. So I will no longer relax.

 

[SilkyandSmooth]

I texlax for convenience. I did the transitioning/natural thing for about two years prior to texlaxing. Although I loved my natural hair, I was spending too much time in the morning doing it. I wasn't feeling the braid/twist thing, so I had to style my hair EVERY day. Now that I'm texlaxed, all I have to do is brush it and go. I truly believe that I have the best of both worlds. Bone straight hair all of the time doesn't work for me, and neither does natural hair. I love my texlaxed hair.

 

[Poohbear]

I went natural because I hated getting relaxer touch-ups. I hated the burning feeling and the smell. Once I discovered online in 2004 that other women who wore their hair in its natural state, I didn't see a reason to relax anymore. See, before discovering LHCF, I was someone who thought all black women relaxed their hair and that was something we were suppose to do. My mom was the one who would relax my hair ever since I was 10 or 11 years old, so it was done out of habit. I didn't know there was such a thing of wearing your hair without relaxers. First, I started transitioning to natural out of curiosity to see what my natural hair was like. Then I started seeing a deeping meaning...appreciating the hair texture that God gave me. I transitioned for a while because of the length issue, I was afraid of having short hair. But then, I chopped it off because it wasn't worth it to me anymore to hang on to thin, breaking, relaxed ends. Now, I've been free from relaxers since October 2004 and will never go back!

 

[Robin41]

I decided to go natural because although my hair was pretty healthy when relaxed, it was very fine and thin and I wanted it to grow out thick and curly. Nothing about bone-straight relaxed hair appeals to me anymore and I'm really liking not having to keep up with those touch-ups.

And I have to admit, the beautiful curly heads on this board inspired me so much! Countrygal, Bublnbrnsuga and so1913 come to mind immediately. Who wouldn't want their hair? I fell in love with natural hair right here and knew it was the right move for me.

BTW, I have to disagree with anybody who thinks that relaxed hair is easier to take care of than natural hair. What's easier than a wash n go or to simply pull it back up into a curly puff? And did I mention no touch-ups? I've never gotten out of the house faster than when I started transitioning.

Needless to say, but after 30-some odd years of relaxing, I'm completely done.

 

[mscocoface]

I went natural for health reasons and I was tired and angry of going to salons and getting my hair done, paying all that money, sitting for hours on end and then when I would get stressed the back of my hair would fall out.

Tried for years to figure what was the cause and realized my hair just does not like relaxers.

It is a preference and with natural hair it is a journey. You are going to have ups and downs, twists and turns but that is part of any journey and that is the mindset you have to be in to understand the natural hair process.

If you are up for it great, if not, then that is your choice and no one else.

I guess the bottom line is figure out what is best for you and go for broke! That is what I did and I am very happy being natural.

 

[guesswho]

I went natural because my scalp will burn to death whenever I had touch ups, don't care how much I deep conditioned, and add moisture and my protein treatments etc nothing seem to work my hair was lifeless I just had enough of adding pieces of weave for bounce and length I said f##k it I'm cutting this sh!t off! my husband went to work and came back and I had less than an inch of hair, poor thing he thought I was going into some dark depression the look at his face was priceless he just start huggin me and telling me he loved me lolol that was too funny, I cut it myself too I just had enough, and that was the best thing I ever did I love my hair now I love watching it grow I can't wait for waistlength and beyond my scalp is healthy and my hair is thick and lovely and I don't ever have to wear weaves for fullness the best thing I ever done concerning my hair

 

[Miss*Tress]

My reasoning is totally superficial erplexed I just love the look of big, curly, natural hair. The shininess, healthiness, and other benefits were all just pluses to me. I had tried to achieve this look by twistouts on my relaxed hair(which was very healthy), but it was not the same. Now I am on my transitioning journey and I can't wait to work my natural hair!!

Same here. Add to that the expense and tedium of going to the salon, plus the scalp burns, I said forget it. Like BrockStar, I'm transitioning and couldn't be happier with my hair.

BTW, my hair is the same type as yours, wyldcurlz, and when I want a nice, smooth style, roller sets give me great results without causing any damage. My wash & go's look decent, but are difficult to untangle for some reason, so I often resort to twist outs for defined, regular curls.

 

[longhairluva]

I'm relaxed becuse my mother relaxed me when I was a girl and it has been that way since. My hair is pretty healthy so I just stick with the relaxer and I don't want to do the bc.

 

[B_Phlyy]

I transitioned for 8 months and have been natural 4 days and had the same questions going on in my head. I ultimately made the decision mostly because I was tired of dealing with two textures, but also because I don't think I'd ever really given my natural hair a chance. I will admit that I still do sometimes treat my hair as if it's still relaxed, but I think with trial and error, I'll get better and keep my hair this way.

 

[ladylibra]

i want to know why the naturals are natural - especially those who had beautiful, healthy relaxed hair and then decided to go natural.

hmmm... well my relaxed/textlaxed hair wasn't the healthiest, but it was in pretty good shape and i considered it to be pretty.

honestly, i just wasn't all that happy with it. i wanted bone-straight hair at the time and my hair does not respond well to chemicals... maybe because it's so thick? i was textlaxed quite against my will... underprocessed really if you wanna get technical. i didn't want to start using lye relaxer cuz i'd heard so many bad things about it, but i wanted straight hair so i was constantly using a lot of heat on my hair every single day. so by the time i'd grow my hair to APL i'd get attacked by ferocious split ends... not sexy! so i'd cut my hair to right above my shoulders and let it grow out again, cut and grow out, cut and grow out... same old boring cycle. m glad i decided to go natural... it was an interesting experience cutting off all but 2 inches of hair and getting to know my true texture. i think i look better with my coily hair than i do with straight hair, although i still like to change it up every now and then.

i hope you pick the best decision for you.

 

[MissFallon]

I've been transitioning for a year and my main reason is simply because my natural hair is thick and I want thick hair. plus I know my natural hair can give me that big hair look that my relaxed hair couldn't.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I hate touchups and depending on stylists.