Naturals, I really could use some help with my daughter's hair!!!

[alexstin]

My little girl has thick natural hair that's probably about brastrap length(if she was old enough to wear a bra LOL!). She is so wanting to get a perm because she hates wash day. I've decided no relaxer until she's old enough to take care of it herself because relaxed hair requires so much more diligence.

I wash her hair and then deep condition, sometimes the comb out is fabulous other times... I blow dry her hair with a comb attachment and then later flat iron it. The last time I flatironed it I went down the hair with a fine tooth comb and her ends were the straightest they've ever been.

I use MIzani or NTM shampoos on her hair, sometimes I dc with Cholesterol but there are othes I use and I like to combout with coconut oil. I have a shower comb, bone combs and a K cutter comb.

I guess I'm just wondering if there are any tips so I don't break down and relax her hair(cause I was VERY close last year).

How in the world do naturals get straight ends without using a fine tooth comb. I"m scared to even think about blowdrying without a comb attachment, any tips on that?

Any hair products that just seem to be better for natural hair?

I have a 2yr old daughter as well and her hair is already past her shoulders...HELP!

 

[deedabug]

seems like u have the products down...

i rarely get straight ends and they have never been as straight as i have seen naturals on here...my hair just wont do it....i dont think it is good for me to force it...

how about some twist styles for a couple of weeks at a time....puffs r always cute to me on little girls...takin care not to try to get it too tight...also if u do puffs u could do twist tendrils....

on wash day all i can suggest is to keep the product applications minimal so there is less time at the sink/tub or whatever....and use ponytail holders so the hair is in sections when washing and won't be all tangled when you are done...

 

[naturaline]

hi... awww ur little girls hair sounds great! my hair was the same until i was about 13 (i would cry just looking at the comb haha). however my natural hairs softer now as i relaxed for so long.

One tip is to try using a round heated brush on the ends... i have the 'Vidal Sassoon Classic 1200W' which gets all of my hair straight.
Be sure you add a heat protecter 1st- i use 'toni & guy, Iron-It Heat Defence Spray'.
and then at night do about 6/8 braids and use a velcro roll- these usually keep my ends very straight

HTH

 

[alexstin]

how about some twist styles for a couple of weeks at a time....puffs r always cute to me on little girls...takin care not to try to get it too tight...also if u do puffs u could do twist tendrils....

Girl, she would not wear puffs, she'd look at me like I'm crazy She's 9 and wants to wear her hair "just like mommy"(I'm relaxed)

 

[kristina]

You didn't mention it, but I will nonetheless suggest a good detangler and a denman brush if you aren't already using- it makes a world of difference. For nice ends I like the maxiglide but I don't know if it would do that much better than a flat iron with a fine tooth comb. I tried that on my own hair and I can't do it. I would also suggest air drying in braids instead of blow drying with a comb attachment. Have you tried twists outs or braid outs? They may also be a way to give her hair a break from the heat. You could also try brush outs. After you wash, condition, detangle well and braid in sections with a creamy leave in (I make one with coconut oil and humectress). Once dry I unbraid and gently brush with a denman. This is how I make smooth, dry ponytails and buns.

 

[SweetP]

I understand wanting her hair "Just like Mommy"...but she is a little girl and I am sure that she understands that when it comes to asking for other things. My sister had the same situation with my niece, but would have no problems telling her "NO" to driving a car, wearing makeup, high heels, etc - other things Mommy does.
Anyway, does your daughter WANT straight hair or just to wear it down? Since her hair is so long, lots of twists or box braids could be seen as a "down" hairstyle. I know she would be adorable with twists as someone else suggested.

 

[alexstin]

You didn't mention it, but I will nonetheless suggest a good detangler and a denman brush if you aren't already using- it makes a world of difference. For nice ends I like the maxiglide but I don't know if it would do that much better than a flat iron with a fine tooth comb. I tried that on my own hair and I can't do it. I would also suggest air drying in braids instead of blow drying with a comb attachment. Have you tried twists outs or braid outs? They may also be a way to give her hair a break from the heat. You could also try brush outs. After you wash, condition, detangle well and braid in sections with a creamy leave in (I make one with coconut oil and humectress). Once dry I unbraid and gently brush with a denman. This is how I make smooth, dry ponytails and buns.

I used to airdry her hair but trying to get a straightening comb through it was more work than either us of wanted to deal with. I got the flat iron idea from this site and that's the method I've been using for the last year or so.

Maybe I need to try the airdrying again(sigh).



SweetP...she wants her hair straight. She wears ponytails alot and we both like her in braids but my braider moved away

 

[Lucia]

Maybe you could start CW, and do some med-big plaits, twists with pretty bows or barrettes. Also if she wants to look special for a regular event like school or outings finger fluff the braid/twist out up into 1 or 2 curly poufs w/ accessories. The blow drying and flat ironing will eventually harm her hair if it's done all the time, and she will get too used to having/needing straight hair she should learn to appreciate her natural texture and how to work with it. Save the flat ironing for very special occasions or when she's older. I went to a wedding and saw many women sporting natural styles, updo's, curlytails, down, shiny twists, etc...and they looked really beautiful w/ their clothes, it was really inspiring. hth

 

[kristina]

I used to airdry her hair but trying to get a straightening comb through it was more work than either us of wanted to deal with. I got the flat iron idea from this site and that's the method I've been using for the last year or so.

Maybe I need to try the airdrying again(sigh).

(

I had the same problem too- you have to detangle really really well before you braid and airdry. So a wide tooth comb won't cut it. I use a denman on each section before braiding and it works well.

 

[alexstin]

I had the same problem too- you have to detangle really really well before you braid and airdry. So a wide tooth comb won't cut it. I use a denman on each section before braiding and it works well.

So the denman is safe to use on wet hair? Why use a brush to detangle?

 

[Country gal]

I am trying to convince my cousin to not perm her daughter. Her daughter's hair is so cute and soft. She says it requires too much work. I told her she should just do twists to give the hair a break. Sometimes she does the puff balls. I don't feel little girls should get perms in their hair.

 

[alexstin]

I don't really like relaxers for little girls either.

I'm looking at the Denman D31 volumiser. It says it's good for detangling.

 

[kristina]

Ummm, well I'm not an expert but brushing on wet hair loaded with detangler and/or conditioner works for my hair. You need to brush rather than use a wide tooth comb for the maxiglide because it gets rid of all the tangles (a wide tooth comb isn't very thorough).

 

[PhonyBaloney500]

Why flat iron it every week?

 

[GodMadeMePretty]

I don't even consider the Denman brushes to be brushes at all. At least not the 3 and 4. They are the best detanglers. My daughter is 6 and will not be getting a perm and as for wearing her hair straight - the answer is no. I didn't even straighten her hair for her recital. The most I will do is rollerset it and put her under the dryer. That straightens her hair enough for her to see length. I'm sure if I really tried hard, I could get her hair a lot straighter with the rollerset.

I think that once a week heat is way too much. One of the reasons that I went natural is so my daughter could have somebody with hair like hers in the house. If you're going to straighten it and have her wear it straight all the time, you may as well apply a relaxer even though I think 9 is too soon.

I understand she is 9 and all, but saying no won't hurt her. Work with her natural texture and save the flat-ironing for special occasions. I'm sure there are some naturals on here who flat-iron regularly but I don't know of many who blow-dry AND flat-iron/press.

 

[caligirl]

The blow drying and flat ironing will eventually harm her hair if it's done all the time, and she will get too used to having/needing straight hair she should learn to appreciate her natural texture and how to work with it. Save the flat ironing for very special occasions or when she's older.

ITA. I didn't even WASH my own hair until I turned 23. I was so used to going to a hairdresser ervery 2 weeks to press my hair that I had no idea what my natural hair was like. Try to stick to heat less styles like Lucia mentioned and only do presses every blue moon.

 

[mermaid]

How in the world do naturals get straight ends without using a fine tooth comb. I"m scared to even think about blowdrying without a comb attachment, any tips on that?

I have to use a comb. I used to use a brush but it finally fell apart after a few years.
Just make sure it's detangled before using the comb, it's not something that is done quickly, it takes me a good couple hours to do my hair- but I don't press very often and I almost always air dry.

 

[alexstin]

I don't use heat every week.... only when I wash. I dread the whole detangling thing so I won't even tell you how often I wash her hair(you might throw tomatoes at me )I'm determined to do better this year though.


It seems like so many use the Denman 3 or 4. I don't hear anything about the D31 but that one was recommended on the Motowngirl site for detangling. I went back to the site and looked at it and they do recommend the D31 for detangling so I'm a little indecisive.

 

[alexstin]

Godmademepretty,

You have sooooo much hair! I see you're from Jville. I was born and raised on the northside.

 

[angelk316]

Try detangling it in sections. After I wash and condition my hair I seperate my hair into 6 sections. I undo the sections one at a time I apply my leave-ins and proceed to detangle.

I also comb my hair with a wide tooth comb while I am rinsing out the conditioner.

 

[PhonyBaloney500]

Also make sure to detangle with your fingers as much as possible instead of just YANKING that comb through when you reach a bad tangle (sorry...having flashbacks ).

I agree with the others! It would be cool if she could see her natural texture...at least for a while. Natural hair really isn't as hard to maintain as some think. It's pretty darned easy once you know damaging things not to do (i.e. combing while dry, blowdrying it to death with a comb attachment, etc.).

 

[PretteePlease]

i use the same technique to flatiron but it works with the larger side of an ace comb, just as well as the fine side.

my daughter has thick hair too see album and for the first time i blow dryed her without the comb attachment and it was great. i used a paddle type brush with the wide plastic tipped ends i thought i would pull her hair out due to a failed denman attempt but it worked she lost the same small amount as with the comb attachment

how often do you wash her hair? I avoid the wash day blues by washing every 3-4weeks. Her hair regimine is simple i was blowdry, oil, butter the ends when the blowdry (which looks like a flatiron using the baby bliss) wears out i braid her hair or bun it or do twistouts. her scalp has no build up because i dont directly oil the scalp only the hair

--wash in sections rinse in sections condition in sections
i found that once you section off the hair you should also put something around the ends to keep them from coiling back up

hope this helps

 

[alexstin]

Ms. Portugal,

What happened with the Denman?

 

[shawniegee]

The Maxiglide did wonders on my daughters hair. I have totally eliminated the blowdryer. I posted these about a year ago but take a peek a miracle girl. http://public.fotki.com/shawnone/jays_progress/maxi_glide-my_boo_boo/

 

[alexstin]

See, now why'd you have to post that. I keep going back and forth on rather or not to get the Maxi. I already have a flat iron that I paid alot for and never use. Decisions, decisions....., puffs, twists, denman, maxiglide, airdry.

I don't know what to do! LOL!

 

[brownsugar9999]

My mother made me wear ponytail (not the ones that were down...BRAIDED) until I took my Senior pics!!!! Just kepp up the good work that you're already doing....she'll thank you in the long run

 

[alexstin]

My mother made me wear ponytail (not the ones that were down...BRAIDED) until I took my Senior pics!!!!

Wow! Your mother took your haircare seriously!