It's me again. Standing in the need of Prayer - Long

[Zeal]

I am going through right now. My unemployment may be cut off and there is family drama. Morso this is about the stress of my family. My Mother is driving me crazy. I know that she is not doing it on purpose as she had a stroke approx 5 years ago. Ok, I will rephrase that….. she always got on my nerves, she just does it more now.

My mother’s house could be on clean sweep. My sister lives there which contributes to the junk. The house has been like that for years. My dad passed away 7 years ago and the house was messed up then . There was not really a clean room in the house that he could go into . I really don’t like going over there. The house stresses me out.

I called my Mom this morning -- about one thing and she made me feel bad. I told her how I had forgotten something important and she went into a litany about how everyone is getting older and forgetting and its the food that we eat and blah blah blah, and Dr. OZ said this … and blah blah blah. Yeah you forgot this and forgot that and blah blah blah…… Yall, can laugh. All I wanted was a , OH SNAP! type of response. SMH I mean can you console me, Mom?


Then every since my Aunt passed away (middle sister) in September. There has been family drama and Mayhem with the Oldest Sister’s (That Aunt is still alive) off spring. My cousin was very rude and nasty to be because she thought I was taking sides and not siding with her. She is taking care of my Aunt now and said no one offered to help her. I told her that sometimes you have to ask for help because no one is going to offer sometimes. I told her no one is 100% wrong. Everyone is equally to blame with the drama. That made her snap. She felt as though I no longer had her back and said she did not give a damn if none of us ever spoke to her again.

I told her that her comments were offensive and hurtful and she does not care. I have not told anyone in the family of this drama because it is not necessary to relay the ignorance and mayhem . However, my Mom asked me why I have not called there and I couldn’t tell her. This is a burden to carry. I am trying to leave it at the alter. Please pray for this situation.

Lastly, I am still out of work.

 

[Prudent1]

Praying for you Zeal. This can not be easy to go through. Sometimes life just is not fair. God is a just God though. I know he loves you and sees all of this. I pray your breakthrough will come soon.
Listen to God is a Healer by Kurt Carr. Meditate on the lyrics.
I'll post a few here...
"Sometimes life will hurt you but remember God heals God is a healer
sometimes weapons form against you but they'll never prosper remember God is your shield
Pre-Chorus: He is waiting for your call waiting to shield you from your fall there's a place of rest and peace in the sanctuary
Chorus: He sits waiting in the sanctuary Yes Yes Yes
He sits waiting in the sanctuary Yes Yes"

 

[Zeal]

Thank you. Going to YouTube now for Kurt Carr.

 

[LovingLady]

For you to have to experience so much, you have to be a strong women, God only gives you what you can handle. One day when you are available you should offer to clean your mom's house. It would be a great way to spend time with her and your sister. You could also use that time as a way to talk to the family about helping out with your aunt (without bringing up what happened between you and your cousin).

My prayers tonight are for you.

 

[Zeal]

SMH. I am so sad. I am at my Mom's house and I don't want to be here. I was planning on spending Christmas here and going back home Sunday night however, I am snowed in.

My Mom and sister bicker a lot. I live alone and I am used to quiet. I have non money to pay my rent. I don't know how I am paying my next bill. My Mom and sis are gong through life as usual,

I really was not happy on Christmas. It was just another day. Sittin in a junky house all day doing nothing. We usually would go to my God-Mother's house on Christmas however she has moved away. This is the first Christmas without her.

My Mom offered to give me money to cook Christmas dinner and they would come to my place. When I agreed she got quiet. Never the less now I am stuck somewhere where I do not want to be.

But I am snowed in. The house is still a wreck and I don't want to be here. My Mom and I got into a spat this morning because she was insulting me. My Mom really stresses me out she just does not realize how much. Then she is having issues where she has to get a test with her heart whereas it is enlarged. that adds to more stress.

Because I am at My Moms house my sister decides to take all the decoration down yesterday "Beacause you are here" you can help me put the stuff away. I asked her why are you taking the decorations down it is only the day after Christmas?

She is stil hounding me as I type to help her when she knows that I am having chest pain. What is wrong with her? I mean did you hear what I said? Do you care? or are you just focused on what you want? I just want to go back to my apartment and be alone. I really do. I am tired of being in this junky house.

Now I am nervous because I am having pian in my heart area. I love my Mom and sister. I jsut don't want to be around them right now. The constant talking and complaining is really stressing me.

On top of a lot of ohter things. No finances. Me not knowing what is going on with me health wise and all of this stress. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME.

I don't want to have to go to the hospital.

 

[Guitarhero]

Zeal, you are not alone. I'm not just passing you off to Jesus cuz I don't have answers...I'm telling you that you are not alone but have many people who do care and are praying for you. Never feel ashamed to ask for prayer.

 

[Shimmie]

Take one step; one move towards where you want to be. It's won't happen otherwise. You will not fail and you are not 'stuck' neither are you in Covenant with your current situation.

The two lepers said, "Why sit we here till we die?" You do not have to be where you are. Take the step and with each step the pains in your chest will subside. Just get up and move towards where you want to be.

Stop sitting there 'feeding' the stress you are under. Get up from under it and move towards your desires. The sooner you move, the sooner you'll feel better. You have no contract with the stress and tension and the muscle spasims in your chest area. Release it, get up and leave, go home. Jesus has been standing holding the door open for you all along. Stop hindering your peace of mind.

Don't say 'can't' because in Jesus 'can't' does not exist. You CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Get up and leave, go home and be at peace. Snow cannot hinder you.

 

[Zeal]

Thanks you all. I do feel better now. I told them again that I was having pain in my heart area. I told my Mom that I needed to go home. I actually do as I have to do a lot of of personal business. All my paper work is in my home.

My mother said you act like we are keeping you here. I will help my sister dig the car out tomorrow. As I do not have a car and I have a lot of things to carry. I wouldn't dare call a cab.

Don't get me wrong. I love, love, love my mother and sister. However, bickering and complaints really stress me in a bad way. I know the change more than likely will have to begin in me.

I really have not shared my stress with my Mom and sister. However, they do know what I am going through (from the outside). I trust God, I believe God, I have faith.

I just need to stop worrying. It's difficult but I will get there.

Thanks for caring and thank you for your prayers.

 

[paradise79]

zeal, as true as you have to honour your mum you must also take care of yourself and be safe? what is the purpose of being at your mum's house with your sister and to feel that bad? with that pain in the chest, I don't think you need that level of stress or worry. Sometimes, we need to take some steps from the ones we love because it may become difficult, it doesn't mean we don't love them but for everyone sake some distance may be required. We are worry about your present and future and all this negativity/complaint is useless.

You're going a lot but Jesus is there, He is working on your mission, on your life. All He asks for is to handle your pains, your pains. He already paid the price for it so be, stay in prayers and stay strong. Don't get into that family mess, let them deal with whatever ugly they want. Praying for you, dear sister and knowing that Jesus loves you and the light will be showing for God's time is the best. We will be strong in prayers.

If you feel strong enough, offer some help to your mum to clean the house. Take care of yourself :blowkiss:

 

[klb120475]

I'm praying for you hun

 

[Zeal]

Thanks you all. I am back in my apartment now. I am at much peace now but TOTALLY exhausted. I asked my Mom inside to see my decorations. She liked them and said. "I remember when my house was clean like this. I keep saying that I need help."

This is the thing you all. My sister lives there. If SHE would get all of her stuff out of the house (even half of it) and put it in storage, that would be half the battle. When I mentioned it to her ( I am sorry that I keep venting) she turns on the deaf ear. She just kept saying Mom needs help. So i said again. Why don't you get your stuff out of the house and then we can go from there. She kept talking as if I said nothing. SMH

If I move my sisters stuff, she says, I'll do it! Don't move my things. But it neverhappens. When I did try to help my mother and asked her where did she want me to put something when it was moved from one place, she gets frustrated and said stop asking me that. Just find some where to put it. The thing is, if I put it somewhere else. That will just be mess in another spot. SMH.

During the fast next month. I am going in for the kill. I can't take this anymore. I need my mind re-newed.

I'm ready for the corpoate fast. If I half to look like skeleton (joking) to get my break thru. I am going there. It's jsut that serious.

 

[joy2day]

Zeal, I am praying for you too. And just so you know, when you make it up in your mind that you are going to get your breakthrough; Guess What? YOU ARE GOING TO GET JUST WHAT YOU SAID YOU ARE GOING TO GET, YOUR BREAKTHROUGH!

I am praising God with you Sis. I know you have been going through a lot, but 2011 is your year! Rejoice! You are going to see blessings and elevation in your life like never before! In the midst of everything keep praising God for being the light to your Mom and Sister. Don't worry, they are going to come around. You have to take that time that you need to get before the Lord and fast, but when all is said and done, you will be a mighty witness to your family members. Just watch...