From Your Anti-Scissor Happy Stylist Advocate!

Supergirl

With Love & Silk
Hey Hair Sisters!

Just some notes that might help someone out. If you will notice that my # 1 hair care tip (in my signature) is to stay away from SHS's. (scissor happy stylists). I feel strongly about this.

The following is just my little 2 cents--well more like 2 dollars.

Well, we are often told that we should have our ends trimmed because splits will travel up the hair shaft. I have tested this theory. I actually plucked a hair from my head that had a split-end and then physically tried to further separate the two split pieces up the entire hair shaft. It didn't happen. In fact, I've never seen this happen on anyone's head of hair. Now, what did happen is that the weaker of the two split-pieces broke right off, leaving a hair end that was "half" as strong as it originally was. A tiny trim would be good just to snip off that weak end.

But, many times when the stylist wants to cut--the ends are not even really split. They may indeed be thinner, but I personally don't believe that they are unhealthy--just older than the rest of the hair. The thinness of the ends is just age. I am speaking of hair that has not been abused of course. If the hair is abused then the ends probably are split and/or damaged. Trimming the hair will not prevent the thinness on the ends, because the hair will always be aging. So weather or not you get a trim every 6 weeks or every 6 months--the hair that is one inch(just as an example) from the ends will be the same age whether or not you've recently had a trim or not. So instead of being fooled into thinking that your hair one inch above the ends is thin because you failed to get a trim and the thinness infected the hair above it with thinness--know that even with the trim, it would have still aged and gotten thinner.

Another reason your stylist may want to give you a trim is to even your hair up. If your hair is uneven, most likely it just grows that way and a "trim" will be such a temporary fix. Because in 2 more months, it will be uneven again. Will your stylist want to trim it again? Evening up the hair takes away length usually. My right side is my "weak" side right now and a stylist evened up my left side with it once (about an inch loss, plus what she trimmed on the right normally) and had the nerve to tell me that my right side broke off to a shorter length than my left, like I don't know my own hair. I was taking very good care of my hair and knew it wasn't breakage. And to further prove my point, my left side is longer and thicker than the right side now. Evening it up was done in vain.

Most trims are strictly for the appearance of the hair. But if when you wear your hair down, it has some kind of curl or bump to it--then it looks fine. The only reason you'd need a blunt trim/cut is if you wear your hair bone straight when you wear it down. (no curls, no bump)

Many times, we do not realize that we are the victim of an SHS. It took my mother pointing it out to me several times that my hair was getting shorter. And I knew it was in great condtion, so it wasn't breakage. Especially (ESPECIALLY) if you are getting your trims at re-touch time. This is the best time when a stylist can take off length and you never even know it. How? Because the re-touch straightens hair that was previously curly thus "stretching" out the length of the hair. You get up from the chair and your hair doesn't look shorter. It looks fine to you. You don't suspect anything. But after so many months, you notice that it ain't gettin' any longer. Your SHS is cutting whatever length you've gained by each re-touch
If your hair is not breaking--you should have gained additional length after each re-touch. If not, you may be the victim of an SHS!

I truly believe that we (black women) have to grow our hair on purpose. It's not something that we can do passively like our counter-parts from other cultures and races. It has to be done intentionally. I believe one of the important steps to intentionally growing the hair is to stay away from scissor happy stylists.

Ask any one of the ladies from this board that trims her own hair and/or does not get trims very often if it has helped or hindered her progress. I'm one of them.

If someone has damaged, abused hair, then they should get a trim and a good one and go from there, taking much better care of the hair from that point on.

I am writing this because I remember how many times as a little girl that I desired to have long hair, but would leave a salon after some woman had said "I'm going to trim your dead ends now baby" and I'd leave with 3-4 inches of hair GONE! When I got older, I said to myself the hair is already dead so there's no such thing as "dead ends." Also, even split ends are rare if you are a frequent wearer of protective styles and use very little to no heat on your hair.

Another thing--if you air-dry your hair, like a good girl then your ends will not look up to par most of the time. But actually, they're fine and healthy. Something about air-drying gives that pitiful looks to the ends, but after a good roller set, you can see that your ends are in great condition. So, don't make a hasty decision if your ends "look" bad one day after air-drying. If you reallly want to know, have a good conditioning and roller set (at home or salon) and then check your ends out. If they still look bad, then you might decide you'd like a trim.

Also, if you know that you are knowledgeable about hair care and are doing a good job with yours--don't let someone just because they are a "professional" with a "license" make you feel like you don't know didly. I've had this experience too.

I hope I have enlightened someone and always remember Supergirl's #1 hair care tip!


Pictures
Album: Supergirlj
 

Babychoc

New Member
Hi Supergirl. Thanks for all that GREAT information. I totally agree 100% with what you said
. I was a victim of SHS and had to learn the hard way
. Now that I do my OWN hair, it's growing and in such great shape! I hated how my now ex-hair dresser always wanted to cut on my hair
! Not anymore, and I'm SOOOOOO much happier with my decision of doing my own hair at home
.

Bye the way your hair is AWESOME
! Keep up the good work!
 

godzooki

Well-Known Member
Ditto! I too was a victim of shs and even worse I knew it and after crying on hubbies shoulder for a few weeks after a chop, I'd go back for a touch up knowing I'd get the big chop again!
and your hair is very beautiful Supergirl! Tres Bien!
 

daviine

Well-Known Member
Supergirl---Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on split ends, thinning ends, and trimming. If you haven't noticed by now, I'm ALWAYS complaining about my ends and then trimming them. I don't think my hair is really damaged but I keep cutting my ends and then complaining about the lack of progress.

Thanks so much for sharing--you have really inspired me to keep going becasue I was seriosuly on the verge of quitting and giving up my hair.


One of the teachers who made a difference in my life and inspired me is Ms. Supergirl.
 

Armyqt

New Member
SO So true Supergirl. You hit the nail on the head. Constant trimming is purely for visual reasons. I think that deifferent parts of our heads may grow at different rates, thus accounting for uneveness. I left alone, I believe the other parts will catch up.

Everything u said made so much sense. Thanks for sharing
.
 

Chipmunk

Well-Known Member
You are so right!

Your hair looks great!

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and your pictures.
 
Thanks alot Supergirl for posting this information. Black women in general DO have to grow their hair on purpose unlike other cultures and SHS work against that.

There's a big difference between dusting hair ends and a SHS.

Thanks again!
 
T

Tee

Guest
Supergirl, your post came just in time for me. I'm getting a touch-up next week and I was thinking that I should get a trim to "maintain my healthy ends" and to "even up" my hair. After reading your thought provoking post, I really don't think it's necessary. I think my stylist is a SHS! I did ask her to cut off all my damaged ends at my last relaxer appointment, and she really went to town! I was expecting 2 inches at most, but she took off about 4 inches. Well, at least all of my hair is healthy now, and I know I don't "need" a trim since I've been taking really good care of it.

Your post was excellent! Thanks for sharing it with us.


Tee
 

uniquev11

New Member
Supergirl, your hair looks so healthy and I agree with what you wrote. There are too many stylists who look for the shortest hairs and then "trim" all of the rest of the hairs up to that point.

I trim my own ends every 2 months, but I make it a point never to trim as much as it grows. That's one of the reasons why I measure on a regular basis.

Sometimes I wonder if the stylists even think about the fact that our hair doesn't grow evenly and that may account for some of the uneven ends, not damage.
 

Tracy

New Member
This was a great post Supergirl. I am glad you posted this -but even better - I'm glad you posted in the MANNER that you did.

Nothing like a comprehensive explanation of WHY we do the things we recommend to give a good understanding and get people moving in the right directions. I experienced the most "growth" after I stopped trimming my hair with every relaxer. Because I too, experienced shorter hair many a time and decided to switch up my routine some and see what happened. Trimming my hair twice yearly (every six months) has been a god send and I'm pretty vigilant about making sure that when I DO trim I go somewhere where I know they won't scalp me. Or in the alterntive watching the stylist like ahawk to see that she only takes off ehat I ask. I even venture to say I'm downright *****y about it. But by doing this, I've been able to retain a lot more of my healthy length and see much more progress as a result.

I must say again - thank you for giving your explanations and doing it so thoroughly. With all the color questions on the board I've been working in a comprehensive color post. I think those of us with areas of "expertise" or areas that we feel particularly passionate about should do this more often. I really feel it's a tremendous help to those of us who are new to such diligent haircare, and is a fabulous way to give back to this community the things we've taken from it on our hair journeys....


Thanks again (and I'll be considering carefully that theory about NOT trimming with realxers, I think there may be something to that).


 

melodee

New Member
Yes! Let's say you have one half inch of growth in a month. If you go to a SHS and he/she trims a half inch off. Your hair will continue to stay the same length and never get longer. Some have fast growing hair that will achieve longer lengths if trimmed regularly. (1 inch growth- 1/2 inch trim= 1/2 inch per month. But if your hair grows slowly, forget it. My stylist trims out of habit, not due to the condition of my hair.
 

Honey6928215

New Member
Supergirl- Your hair is so beautiful. I hope to accomplished my goal and with that I have gottene me motivated. Your hair is so glossy and healthy. What is your vitamin and haircare regime if you haven't post it already?

PLEASE share!! Keep up the good work.
 

LondonDiva

New Member
If it's not already then I think you need to ask one of the moderators to pin this post to the top for newbies as well as the old timers to see.


Supergirl this is extremely informative and I appreciate the time taken to write this all out for us. I'm glad you mentioned the hair splitting thing. Do you know how hard it is to expell this 'myth' from peoples heads that it will split all the way up?
Or to convince them that their hair IS actually growing?? When I ask them why they need a retouch then, they give me this blank expression, as if to say Oh yeah it is growing. It's just the ends that need taking care of or like you say periodically with every touch up they are talked into getting a trim at the salon.

Thanks again girl
 

lunalight7

New Member
Supergirl, your hair is lovely so I KNOW you know what youre talkin' 'bout!! My last stylist was freakin' Edward Scissorhands!!! He cut my hair constantly because they were "damaged". well guess who was damaging my hair? HIM !!! I wish Id known about this board back then. When I went to him initially, Id just taken out my extentions and I had shoulder length hair. Within a year, my hair got shorter and shorter until it was above my earlobes. Plus, I was never happy with the way it looked and I could barely wait the 6 weeks to get a touch up! Now, my stylist uses good products, protein after every tocuhup, rollersets, etc. He hasnt trimmed my hair since the very first time I went to him, over a year and a half ago....thanks for your wonderful insight on this subject...we needed it.
 

jd_bdfly

New Member
This was a really good post. I vacillate so much between worrying that my ends look scraggly and worrying that the stylists cut too much off to maintain progress. The question that I have is how do you avoid the SHS? Everytime I get a touch-up it seems like it's pretty much a given that my hair gets trimmed. Are there any stylists out there that truly believe trimming is purely optional and not necessary? Any non-SHS that you can recommend? In NYC?

The thing that kind of disheartens me when I spend time on the boards is that the more I learn, the more it seems like I'd be happier staying away from salons.
So then the only solution is at-home touch ups and trims. However, I really don't feel comfortable doing this at home. So again I wonder, are there any stylists that can meet ALL of our needs out there?
 

Lindy

New Member
[ QUOTE ]
Something about air-drying gives that pitiful looks to the ends, but after a good roller set, you can see that your ends are in great condition. So, don't make a hasty decision if your ends "look" bad one day after air-drying.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow; that is funny that you said this cuz I was checking out my ends last week while re-twisting my hair one night...My ends looked so thin that I actually trimmed each piece while I did my twists!! ANd I just had my hair trimmed about 3 weeks ago when I had my touch up... I just didn't like the way my hair went from being thick up at the top of my twist, then petered out to a thin itsy bitsy twist at the end!! (Does anyone else have this problem??!!!) I hate that!!!
 

ineedmoney

New Member
your name fits u to the tee, cuz this post is definately super. me personally i like having my ends cliped. i don't go to the salon often but let me tell you may hair is a mess and when i got ends trimed last year it just seemed like thing were so much better! but i haven't had a trim sense decmeber( i spot cut some hair in april) so when i go in sept i won't have to worry about cutting off all my hair. i just my hair is good condtion and i don't lose growth.
 

sylviaetc

New Member
supergirl: i wish i had your 2cnts bfor i wnt to get my hair trimmed last month. i went o tthis dominican hairdrssr hatt a frriend of mine recommended. so ttheee sylist ttteeeels me that i need a trim bad and that i can't waitt another month. so not being hair savvy i readily agreed. BIG MISTAKE!!! this woman cut all of my hair off! i had abot 23 inches... ok it was in bad shape but it was mine right! when she was done she had'nt trimmed my ends she had gave me a haircut! but thats not the half of it, no!!!! right now i'm stuck with one of those 80's bobs where you leave the back long and cut the front about 3ins. long and make rows of curls. PICTURE IT! i'm livid! right now all i can do is sport my phoney tail til the front grows back...
ladies beware!!!! they're out to get you!!! they love cutting hair because they are envious. lol everyone knows that most hairstylist have the worst hair...
BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!BEWARE!!!!
 

Peachtree

New Member
Hey Supergirl


I really enjoyed reading your post... I could relate to everything u said...EVERYTHING
. We've had a lot of the same experiences with SHS. As u already know, that's why I trim my own...when I want to & on my own terms, much like yourself.

Listen Miss Missy, that hair of your is sooo beautiful. I simply love the 2nd pic... & girl, your length, wow
. It's sooooo beautiful. Question...Was your hair "air dried" in that pic? I simply love the fullness.
.

God Bless luv,
Peachtree
(OH YEAH, FOR THE UMPH-TEENth TIME, I'M NOT KIMBERLEY LOCKE
)
 

AZJeepgurl

New Member
You were right on a lot of points, Supergirl! And heck, look at your hair???? Who can argue?

Thanks for the wake up call!

AZ
 

LondonDiva

New Member
[ QUOTE ]
This was a really good post. I vacillate so much between worrying that my ends look scraggly and worrying that the stylists cut too much off to maintain progress. The question that I have is how do you avoid the SHS? Everytime I get a touch-up it seems like it's pretty much a given that my hair gets trimmed. Are there any stylists out there that truly believe trimming is purely optional and not necessary? Any non-SHS that you can recommend? In NYC?

The thing that kind of disheartens me when I spend time on the boards is that the more I learn, the more it seems like I'd be happier staying away from salons.
So then the only solution is at-home touch ups and trims. However, I really don't feel comfortable doing this at home. So again I wonder, are there any stylists that can meet ALL of our needs out there?


[/ QUOTE ]

There are only 2 things you can do to prevent this from happening if you don't want it to happen.

1. Watch everything that they do.
2. Speak up.

If you're reading a magazine or something then they have time to pick up some scissors and start trimming or cutting as they like to do. Watch these ladies like hawks. If you hair is healthy and you want to trim it yourself then do so. You have every right to request them not to trim your hair. They'll probably tell you everything under the sun just to chop some off.

If you do want it trimmed by them then you should show them how much you want taken off and get them to show you how much they're taking off throughout the whole trimming process.
 

Supergirl

With Love & Silk
Ladies, thanks for all of your positive words of encouragement and I am SO glad that this post has helped some of you.

[ QUOTE ]
The question that I have is how do you avoid the SHS? Everytime I get a touch-up it seems like it's pretty much a given that my hair gets trimmed. Are there any stylists out there that truly believe trimming is purely optional and not necessary? Any non-SHS that you can recommend? In NYC?

The thing that kind of disheartens me when I spend time on the boards is that the more I learn, the more it seems like I'd be happier staying away from salons. So then the only solution is at-home touch ups and trims. However, I really don't feel comfortable doing this at home. So again I wonder, are there any stylists that can meet ALL of our needs out there?


[/ QUOTE ]

One stylist (after a re-touch) began to trim my ends. I stopped her and said "Remember, you just trimmed them 3 weeks ago." Her response to me was that she was doing it out of habit. She told me that she trims ends with re-touches much like all of the maintenance that happens to a car on its oil change. HELLO! My hair is NOT a car. This clued me in that alot of them (we'll call them 'them'
) trim out of sheer habit whether or not your hair needs it. I now trim my own hair. I don't worry about it becoming uneven b/c I only trim about 1/4 inch each time. With such a small amount, any uneven-ness would't be noticeable. Learning to trim your own ends is a learning process. I do go to the salon for my re-touch though. Some of the ladies on the board have skillz like that, but not me!

Kimberly Locke/Peachtree, in the 2nd pic-- my hair was air-dried then I flat ironed it and bumped it with a large barreled ceramic curling iron.

My regimen is posted somewhere on the board
I'll look for it.
 

beana3

Active Member
i cant thank you enough for posting this!!! My ends are definetely thinner and i trim mainly for the purpose of making them look thicker, not as much as to eliminate split ends.

Your post has reminded me of my vow to GROW my hair first THEN attempt to clip my ends if I choose.. Dont get me wrong i have a few splits, but my ends are moreso just less thick looking. I'm glad you posted this, i've added it to my fav threads!
 

Mahalialee4

New Member
My point is: (And Being A licensed stylist) among other thins): Truth or Dare:
1. conditioners, trims, etc. are considered the "extras" to the the simple wash and set. Stylists are encouraged to push these products and services.
2. cuts and trims are for the purpose of shaping and styling, and neither of the two will prevent your hair from being a mess or ugly!!! but stylists are encouraged to push these services. Another big mover is the "6 week relaxer!", and not a minute more or your hair will self destruct!!! Stylist are encouraged to push this "time factored product and service". Understand that this is their "bread and butter!" How they make their living...hamburger or steak!!!!
3. I personally believe that many stylists have been brainwashed by beauty schools and the industry into believing and passing on redundant information because they are shop owners or work for someone and they are there to "make money", not be your friend. If they present themself as your friend and you believe it, then you should be receiving the kind of treatment and service that someone who truly cares about you would give. If you can find a stylist who is willing to respect that you too have a brain and that you know what you want and does her very best to satisfy your wants, then keep her/him. If not, kick her/him to the curb without a second thought or any false guilt trips! Wwhen they jack up your head, do you think they are losing sleep or counting the money???If you went to a garage, a grocer, a clothing store, a shoe store, and they insisted on ignoring your requests and orders and just robotically gave you old tires instead of new, crackers for bread, a size 12 because that is what they have and you wear a ten or a 14, and size 6 shoes when you wear a 10! what's up with that? I personally know some stylists who after their customers leave talk about how gullible and stupid the customer was. The comment was made "No, I don't feel bad, if she was stupid enough to believe it, I got my money, it's not my fault she's stupid!!!!......(This was after brow beating and belittling the customer in front of other customers....I saw a lot)Acknowleging that something is wrong about their pet theories, would lessen or totally cut their incomes. Many of these stylists are RENTING A CHAIR FROM THE SALON OWNER and they have to play by their rules in the owner's salon or it's out the door baby!!!
I do not do perms, relaxers, or chemical dyes. I work only on natural hair, and ladies that had long hair never had a problem with me, because when they said 1", that is what they got and if their hair was curly they got less because of the shrinkage. I am amazed that of all the businesses in the world, some ladies insist that their stylist is their FRIEND! AND THAT IS WHERE YOU GET HOOKED AND lose your speech when they mess up your hair plans! The stylist works for you! For years, women have been taking their hard earned money and handing it over for bad treatment and abuse, paying for somebody's fine car and fur coat. Ladies, I only know one other profession where women take their hard earned money and hand it over to a smooth talking controlling individual that talks down to them, belittles them and treats them like dirt!!! That's right.....your singing coach!!!!(
)
 

melodee

New Member
My stylist doesn't act like she wants my hair to grow. When I tell her i'm trying to add length, she ignores my comment, or says "it is growing". Well how come it always seems to be the same length( or shorter) then.

Shouldn't a stylist take your hair goals into consideration when styling YOUR hair? At least act like you're concerned.
It's a shame that we are at their mercy, they can cut off as much as they feel like. Far too often, I'll have my stylist say my ends are going to get raggedy unless I trim. I say,if it ain't broke...
 

azul11

Well-Known Member
This is such a coincidence i just typed this in another thread:i was reading wanakee's pamphlet and while at first i wondered why cathy howse had not agreed with wanakee i can now see why. she said every 6-8weeks you should trim your hair. and so if you get a 1/4 - 1/2 inch per month in 8 weeks you could have grown 1 inch and by 8 weeks if you trim 1/4 inch you will have 3/4 inch of new length and she said you will have 1-1/2 inches of real length in four months. she said to trim before your hair splits and your hair is healthier by being trimmed more often.

something about that i couldnt swallow and when i see the projection of the length people are hoping for it seems amazing compared to how much some systems would have you getting. i get the idea of trimming to keep the hair even, even trying to get rid of damage or split ends but having a scheduled trimming time where you take off almost a month's worth of growth just so your hair wont split doesnt make sense. especially since she advocates protective styling so in theory the protective styles should make the hair less susceptible to splits and damage.


I agree 100% with your assessment. when i saw a split i was so ready to grab and scissor and go to work but exactly what you said happened. the other part of the split broke off and the hair looked uniformed. i was like so should i still cut it???
i also agree with the air drying thing, my hair air dried never dries straight and smooth like with a roller set so you wonder if maybe the hair is damaged or x,y,z. i do believe that it seems like we have been brain washed a bit by scissor happy stylist who have made us believe that the solutions to our hair problems is with a pair of scissors.


I agree with LONDONDIVA. This should be kept at the top because some days you go through moments where you feel like your hair doesnt look its best and you start to believe that a trim is the answer. The key should be to grow grow grow grow grow. no one is suggesting that trims arent important but that they arent necessary to grow your hair and i am tired of hearing that same old thing where trimming helps your hair grow. what kind of logic is that? if you keep cutting your nails how would they get longer? for your nails to grow you wouldnt cut it? you would cut it to even it up but not for the purpose of growing it.
God bless you all.
 
Top