Ending natural journey to pursue length?

[cmw45]

Recently, and not so recently, I have considered ending my natural hair journey to pursue a maximum hair length journey. Now, now, now, before anyone says the two journeys do not have to be mutually exclusive...I would say that I agree. For a lot of women, pursuing length does not seem to require a chemical of any sort and yes I have seen the various inspiration threads on this forum and on youtube. However, after more than two years of dealing with single strand knots and the multi-strand knots (which results from shed hair getting tangled with non-shed hair) and the continuous cutting that results from both, I think I may have come to the end of my natural hair journey...

...but I haven't decided yet. I love my natural hair but I would really like to start retaining a little more length. So...my sorority is having our Eastern Regional Conference this weekend in Baltimore and I plan to have my hair professionally flat ironed (by a natural hairstylist) and trimmed to get rid of all of the knots. After the conference, I plan to start a 2 year Crown & Glory Challenge with continuous braids (with about one week breaks) in between. After two years of braids I will then make the decision as to whether or not to continue natural, to BKT or to texturize.

So...are there any naturals who have struggled with this decision, relaxed or texturized and found they were able to retain more length after knot issues went away. I see some naturals mention this problem in threads but did not found a single thread dedicated to this issue so...

 

[CenteredGirl]

I stopped wearing my natural hair twisted for all the reasons you described above. I am now committed to low manipulation through washing once per month and flat ironing it. I haven't had a broken hair since.

 

[Dee Raven]

I don't have the same degree of problem with the single strand knots, I get them, but not to the point where they have prevented my retention. But my question is how are you detangling? Are you using a denman? I used to take such a long time to detangle my hair, with lots of conditioner in the shower, it took like an hour or more. But then I started using the denman brush and that cut it down to less than 1/2 hour with just a little oil on it and damp. Also, due to a recommendation I think I got from I really need to shampoo all of my hair, or it will get clumpy and that's when the knotting problem occurs.

I don't know if this relates to your situation at all, but this is what I have found. As far as your plan, I think it sounds quite reasonable. I have found that with longer hair I've had less issues with tangling. Good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[msa]

Hey Soror! We have our Farwest Regional Conference next month.

Anyway, Rapunzel* just relaxed on Saturday for the same exact reason. Check her most recently started threads. Also MsTwana, DDTexlaxed, and TheLaurynDoll all recently went back to relaxed after being natural for a while so they may all be able to help. And Je Ne Sais Quoi relaxed and is now transitioning again so she may be able to provide a good perspective as well.

Myself, I get knots the most when I don't get rid of the shed hair. So now I just detangle more often and thoroughly. I also had to quit letting my hair shrink up so often. It works for me. (But relaxers/chemicals aren't an option for me anyway so that's why I had to find something that worked).

I also think after 2 years of c&g, if you do decide to do that, you'll have retained a lot of length, which will surely affect your decision. I think it's a good idea to put your hair away for awhile, explore alternatives, and then decide.

 

[loulou82]

I've thought about whether or not I would relax if I didn't reach a comfortable length as a natural. When I decided to go natural I gave myself 4 years from my last relaxer to reach BSL-MBL. I too love my natural hair and the only issue I have are SSKs but they aren't problematic enough for me to look at other options (BKT, straight natural, or relaxing). I doubt I would actually relax again. The process makes my cringe and I am in no way capable of applying my own relaxer but I do trust my flat iron skills.

Your Crown and Glory plan sounds on point. I always liked your natural hair.

 

[PinkSkates]

I don't struggle with my hair decisions because it's my hair and I do what pleases me. I could care less what a bunch of strangers think of my hair decisions.
Do what makes sense to YOU what will make you the happiest with YOUR hair.
I personally don't have a problem with knots because I keep my hair straightened 75% of the time. Good luck with your hair goals!

 

[cmw45]

I don't have the same degree of problem with the single strand knots, I get them, but not to the point where they have prevented my retention. But my question is how are you detangling? Are you using a denman? I used to take such a long time to detangle my hair, with lots of conditioner in the shower, it took like an hour or more. But then I started using the denman brush and that cut it down to less than 1/2 hour with just a little oil on it and damp. Also, due to a recommendation I think I got from I really need to shampoo all of my hair, or it will get clumpy and that's when the knotting problem occurs.

I don't know if this relates to your situation at all, but this is what I have found. As far as your plan, I think it sounds quite reasonable. I have found that with longer hair I've had less issues with tangling. Good luck with whatever you decide.

I actually found far more knots when I detangle with the denman. Especially in the section of my hair that is 3C.

I have heard this is true as well. I am currently at full APL stretched so hopefully two years would get me to MBL stretched.

 

[cmw45]

Hey Soror! We have our Farwest Regional Conference next month.

Anyway, Rapunzel* just relaxed on Saturday for the same exact reason. Check her most recently started threads. Also MsTwana, DDTexlaxed, and TheLaurynDoll all recently went back to relaxed after being natural for a while so they may all be able to help. And Je Ne Sais Quoi relaxed and is now transitioning again so she may be able to provide a good perspective as well.

Myself, I get knots the most when I don't get rid of the shed hair. So now I just detangle more often and thoroughly. I also had to quit letting my hair shrink up so often. It works for me. (But relaxers/chemicals aren't an option for me anyway so that's why I had to find something that worked).

I also think after 2 years of c&g, if you do decide to do that, you'll have retained a lot of length, which will surely affect your decision. I think it's a good idea to put your hair away for awhile, explore alternatives, and then decide.

*waves* Awe, I will be attending the East, the Midwest, the Central and the Southwest but not the Farwest. It's in Alaska right?

Thank you for your support/advice. I am going through a transitional period in my life and I really feel like putting my hair away is the best option. I acutally really like the way I look in kinky twist and braids so two years will not be a big deal.

 

[cmw45]

I've thought about whether or not I would relax if I didn't reach a comfortable length as a natural. When I decided to go natural I gave myself 4 years from my last relaxer to reach BSL-MBL. I too love my natural hair and the only issue I have are SSKs but they aren't problematic enough for me to look at other options (BKT, straight natural, or relaxing). I doubt I would actually relax again. The process makes my cringe and I am in no way capable of applying my own relaxer but I do trust my flat iron skills.

Your Crown and Glory plan sounds on point. I always liked your natural hair.

This sounds good. After my C&G challenge I will have been natural for five years so I fee like that is a good place to make a decision. I also will probably be natural again at some point in my life since I loved my TWA.

THANK YOU, that is very sweet.

 

[ladylibra]

I actually found far more knots when I detangle with the denman. Especially in the section of my hair that is 3C.

I have heard this is true as well. I am currently at full APL stretched so hopefully two years would get me to MBL stretched.

actually i've noticed this too. i didn't start having serious knot problems until i got my Denman. i'm guessing because it promotes so much coil definition (and therefore, more shrinkage and more tangling). just this week i've decided to go back to using combs until i can get an Aveda paddle brush.

i like your plan. i'd say maybe consider trying BKT before you go back to relaxing, but of course it all depends on what your ultimate goal is, what works best for your lifestyle and bank account, etc.

i wish you luck! and um... i hope you remember to post some pics for us before you start your C&G challenge...

 

[msa]

*waves* Awe, I will be attending the East, the Midwest, the Central and the Southwest but not the Farwest. It's in Alaska right?

Go 'head girl! Yup it's in Alaska. I really wanted to go but I can't because of a family thing. But I will be at National next year for sure!

Thank you for your support/advice. I am going through a transitional period in my life and I really feel like putting my hair away is the best option. I acutally really like the way I look in kinky twist and braids so two years will not be a big deal.

You're quite welcome. The two years will go by quickly I'm sure. And I'm sure you'll get to your MBL goal. Think of the fro's and braidouts you could have , especially since your braidouts are already gorgeous (I saw them in another thread). And if you do relax, at least you'll have experienced long natural hair.

 

[cmw45]

actually i've noticed this too. i didn't start having serious knot problems until i got my Denman. i'm guessing because it promotes so much coil definition (and therefore, more shrinkage and more tangling). just this week i've decided to go back to using combs until i can get an Aveda paddle brush.

i like your plan. i'd say maybe consider trying BKT before you go back to relaxing, but of course it all depends on what your ultimate goal is, what works best for your lifestyle and bank account, etc.

i wish you luck! and um... i hope you remember to post some pics for us before you start your C&G challenge...

YES! I never figured out why this is, I think you may have hit it on the head, but the knots are much worse as in much bigger with the denman; I actually had a pretty big set back a year ago in the back left part of my hair from a knot after detangling with the denman. I let my denman go a little while ago and the knots have decreased a bit.

Thanks. I will definitely consider the BKT before relaxing again.

I definitely plan to. I am going to take a photo after I wash and detangle my hair (naked) and after the stylist flat irons it and I'll update this thread witht the pics. I will also try to remember to post pics in two years.

 

[LovinLocks]

Aveda Paddle Brush ?

a just this week i've decided to go back to using combs until i can get an Aveda paddle brush.

Please, me tell, what

will do? it appears to look just like my Denman??? So much to learn, geez.

 

[Hairsofab]

I'm having the same dilemma. I almost bought a relaxer kit this weekend.

 

[knt1229]

I am not natural but I am transitioning and am 24 weeks post. But it seems to me that you may need to comb and detangle more often. I have noticed some small knots and it is coming from the fact that I finger comb now whereas pre LHCF I would use the comb all the time.

So I have decided to comb my hair once a day and keep my hair moisturized by deep conditioning 1x a week, co-wash 1x a week, and moisturize and seal with oil. This has made my hair very soft and manageable. I have only a few small knots here and there and nothing more. But had I continued to not thoroughly comb my hair I would have had much more knotting and tangles.

I don't think you should let something like this force you back to a relaxer. Make changes to your regi or change your combing schedule before taking the step to relax.

 

[LoveLiLi]

I am natural and I will not go back to relaxers for any reason, knots, tangles, split ends etc. I had a scare and that was enough for me.

However, I understand your problem. I know I should have been at full bsl by now, but I went over two years without straightening my hair and my ends looked horrible. I had to let a lot of hair go.

Have you considered flat-ironing on a regular basis? I started doing this for a few months and noticed I was gaining length and my ends were still healthy. I stopped flat-ironing for a little over two months once the weather got really warm and it started raining constantly. I flatironed last week and saw a bunch of spilt ends again .

I got a trim and now I know I have to stick to wearing my hair straightened to keep my length. Wearing my hair in its natural state is pretty and it's much easier than flat-ironing, but I can't do it all the time without getting splits (two or more on one strand) and knots.

But I will never go back to relaxers - Phyto scared me away for life. I suggest flat-ironing. Take a look at SoCalli's hair for inspiration - she's natural and wears her hair straight most (if not all) of the time and her hair is both long and healthy.

 

[prettynatural]

I will concur with another poster, I had to stop wearing twists, twist outs and wash n gos and my single hair knots disappeared. I finger comb and do low manipulation. Also, stretched hair styles work good to keep out knots too. I don't allow for my hair to shrink and I haven't had problems maintaining length. Good luck!

 

[donewit-it]

Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. You seem to have a plan, though; which is more than I can say for myself.

I'm ready to slap some relaxer in my hair too. I would have been natural for three years come August 6th (to be exact) My longest run yet.


I never cared for braids, but maybe we need to hide from our hair for a minute

Good luck

 

[ladylibra]

Re: Aveda Paddle Brush ?

Please, me tell, what

will do? it appears to look just like my Denman??? So much to learn, geez.

i should clarify... i have the D3. i guess Denman has a paddle brush too... hmmm... now i am torn!

paddle brushes don't cause near as much shrinkage IME as the Denman does. and previously, every paddle brush i ever had, my hair tore apart. apparently the Aveda paddle brush is "sturdier."

 

[GoingNatural]

i went natural to pursue length

 

[loolalooh]

I voted "did not have a chemical treatment and have been able to retain length (share technique). "

I just keep my hair in small twists, and if I wear it loose, it's usually in a small twistout. I try not to wear the twistout for more than 3 days. Chunky twistouts, braidouts, and banding usually lead to knots for me.

I do get single-strand knots every now and then, but they are usually few and I let them be. HTH!

 

[lilsparkle825]

I voted "considering". I wanted to texturize because of the same reason...in January I flat ironed and trimmed, and the next month I flat ironed again and couldn't even tell I had trimmed because my ends were so raggedy. I got so mad that I kept my hair straight for the next 2 weeks, then put in some senegalese twists so I didn't have to look at my ends...the result of all of that is in my sig.

Basically, what I have learned is that my hair rebels against me when I wear WNGs -- problem is, I love WNGs. They are my staple style. I tried being low-mani and only detangling once a week, which spelled disaster. Then again, washing every day also makes me lose a lot of hair. What I have started *trying* to do is take 10 minutes after cowashing to do 5 big flat twists and then wear a twistout the next few days; this is working better for me, but only works when I cowash at night, cause I am NOT going out in public with those dumb looking flat twists in my head (I have a big forehead, so I can't wear straight back braids/twists, not to mention I don't do them neatly). My plan for the rest of the summer is a personal HYH challenge for at least 2 straight months, then I will assess the situation. I like what loulou said about giving my hair time, though -- my last relaxer was exactly 2 years ago this month, and I am at APL, so perhaps 2 more years will yield BSL-MBL.

 

[GoingNatural]

when i started using products with cones the number of knots i was getting reduced dramatically to virtually none. When i was trying to use all natural products my hair didn't have the slip that it needed.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I stopped wearing my natural hair twisted for all the reasons you described above. I am now committed to low manipulation through washing once per month and flat ironing it. I haven't had a broken hair since.

WOW, can you explain more about your regimen to me, please? I am long transitioning and am interested in doing something like this. I also would like to do textured styles, too. What helps keep your hair strait, because I had no luck at doing this when I was natural! I relaxed too strait and though I see length, I miss doing flat twists and wash n gos. I'll texlax after my Sylver 2 stretch. Then I can have the best of both worlds.

 

[msa]

when i started using products with cones the number of knots i was getting reduced dramatically to virtually none. When i was trying to use all natural products my hair didn't have the slip that it needed.

That's a good point. Silicones are very useful for making the hair smooth and helping it to kind of slide right past each other instead of getting tangled.

I don't use silicones but coconut oil works exactly the same way for me. It lubricates the strands so that they don't get knotted up.

 

[MissBCurly]

I am natural and have retained length despite knots. I went for twa el/nl-stretched at BC to currently sl apl-stretched

I have retained length by protective styling (wigs. weaves. no-minimal heat)
Im a daily moisturizer and I stay up on my protein game..i listen to my hair basically. Im shooting for bsl by the end of summer =) hopefully ill get a surprise and be a little over my the end of the oct!

 

[laurend]

OP do you wear wash and go's? I get a lot of knots from that style. I think BKT might be the answer for you.

 

[Gibsongal]

I got those pesky knots too. I tried to do the low mani thing, but my hair rebelled. The denman also caused too many problems to mention. Had to leave that one alone. I've found that co-washing or detangling 2 to 3 times a week keeps the tangling at bay. I've done yarn braids, wigs and regular braids to keep from relaxing. If I didn't have serious HIH I'd try to go 2 years in braids too. That sounds like such a good idea!

 

[HipHopPoetics]

I get knots but I want to keep my hair natural. What do you use to detangle? I use a (knock off) denman brush and make sure my hair is thoroughly moisturized before using the brush. It's good to find a good conditioner that also has detangling properties. You can really avoid knots if you use a denman brush (or a conair knock off) and never brush when it's dry.

 

[HipHopPoetics]

I got those pesky knots too. I tried to do the low mani thing, but my hair rebelled. The denman also caused too many problems to mention. Had to leave that one alone. I've found that co-washing or detangling 2 to 3 times a week keeps the tangling at bay. I've done yarn braids, wigs and regular braids to keep from relaxing. If I didn't have serious HIH I'd try to go 2 years in braids too. That sounds like such a good idea!

Gibsongal, what problems have you had with the denman? I'm curious.