Poohbear
Fearfully Wonderfully Made
Premarital Sex isn't the only Sin - Courting before Marriage
We all know as Christians that we are to abstain from sex before marriage. (However, we also must keep in mind that God is a forgiving God, and if we feel remorse for having sex outside of marriage, we must confess our sin and repent).
After reading all the posts in the locked Sex and the Christian Single thread, I would like to take the topic a step further and ask about preparation for marriage. Premarital sex isn't the only sin in the Bible that single men and women can commit. If we really want to get technical with the "Shoulds" and "Should nots", should we refrain from other activities as well that take our attention away from God (watching movies, going places, shopping, playing games, talking on the phone instead of praying to God, etc.)? All these dating activities that don't involve sex can also be considered lust of the eye or lust of the world which are sins against God and do not give God glory.
There were a couple of posts in that thread that I agreed with that made me want to start this thread. Here they are:
So how are we to court instead of dating? Are we to just let our parents arrange marriages for us? Are we to stay completely away from the man we want to marry to avoid any sexual thoughts/advances/etc. until the time comes to get married?
Instead of going out on dates with our significant other/boyfriend, should we spend time praying together, reading the Bible together, fellowshiping with other Christians, and participating in church activities?
I know I asked a load of questions here...I just would like to hear your thoughts on this; but better yet, Biblical references and scriptures for the answers of these questions.
Thanks in advance!
We all know as Christians that we are to abstain from sex before marriage. (However, we also must keep in mind that God is a forgiving God, and if we feel remorse for having sex outside of marriage, we must confess our sin and repent).
After reading all the posts in the locked Sex and the Christian Single thread, I would like to take the topic a step further and ask about preparation for marriage. Premarital sex isn't the only sin in the Bible that single men and women can commit. If we really want to get technical with the "Shoulds" and "Should nots", should we refrain from other activities as well that take our attention away from God (watching movies, going places, shopping, playing games, talking on the phone instead of praying to God, etc.)? All these dating activities that don't involve sex can also be considered lust of the eye or lust of the world which are sins against God and do not give God glory.
There were a couple of posts in that thread that I agreed with that made me want to start this thread. Here they are:
yodie said:I started thinking...
All of the choices listed in the poll are in reference to dating or trying someone out. Dating, although I have done it, DOESN'T exist as it relates to the bible. There's no such!! Dating, aka, testing out the possibility of a future mate, gives place to many of the choices listed in the poll. This leads to sin and stepping out of God's will for marriage/sex. Dating also teaches us that "try 'em and leave 'em" mentality. I know it's part of our culture, but that's definitely not the way God designed it, which is why people were married (in God's eyes) when they became physical with one another.
honeyflaava said:Excellent post Yodie! I agree with everything that you stated. Dating is not of God, but rather of this world. In addition to the “try ‘em and leave ‘em” mentality that you mentioned, dating also teaches people to practice marriage and divorce. The same emotions that a married couple experience during a divorce, are the very same emotions that people who date experience when a relationship ends. God hates divorce, and it is not His will for us to experience the heartache and damaged emotions that are associated with relationships and break ups. Plus nowhere in the Bible do we read about people dating or even see the terms 'boyfriend/girlfriend' which are also of this world. We only see courtship and the titles of husband and wife. IMO, Christians who understand God's purpose and plan for marriage will not date, they will court. And there is a huge difference in the two…
So how are we to court instead of dating? Are we to just let our parents arrange marriages for us? Are we to stay completely away from the man we want to marry to avoid any sexual thoughts/advances/etc. until the time comes to get married?
Instead of going out on dates with our significant other/boyfriend, should we spend time praying together, reading the Bible together, fellowshiping with other Christians, and participating in church activities?
I know I asked a load of questions here...I just would like to hear your thoughts on this; but better yet, Biblical references and scriptures for the answers of these questions.
Thanks in advance!
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