LHCF 'SET BACK' PREVENTION 101

[30something]

For you emotional girls out there, like my self.. I guess this will be more about emotional set backs. If you find 12 broken pieces on the shrink, relaxed. Its not the end of the world, there IS solution.

Also... Its important to have inspirations, but don't let your admiration turn in to an obsession of comparing your self with someone's else progress. As soon as you start comparing you fall short. Like what jamaraa was saying (or something close to it), you don't know "sally" you don't know her story.

I think, well at least for me the biggest set backs are emotionally straining your self over your hair, it can lead to making frantic not well thought out decision and tremendous emotional stress... it makes you change your regimen, run to the beauty supply store spend tons of cash, cut your hair off, rip through matted tangle hair,... those are major set backs. The solution most likely is already at your disposal, i think once you realize that there IS a solution coming, it will help reduce a lot of anxiety.

And if you get down...You got to give your self some credit even if you don't have WL hair being on HHJ is something to be proud of no matter what state your hair is.

I'd give a few examples of when emotions got the best of my hair and cause set backs but I have yapped enough.. heh..

 

[carletta]

Get those damaged ends off before the damage gets worse!

I had a mini setback this year, but I really think I saved myself from a bigger setback by trimming my ends.

DITTO !!!!!!

I DIDNT TRIM MY ENDS AND BEFORE I KNEW IT !!!!! I HAD TO TRIM 3INCHS OFF MY HAIR


KEEP WATCH ON THE ENDS AND TRIM WHEN NECESSARY...PLEASE !

 

[bestblackgirl]

Plz make sure you detangle, wash your hair, and prepare your hair before you get a relaxer.
Stupid me wore a full weaves for 2 months. Took it out, and put on a relaxer the next day without even putting a comb in my hair. Can you say disaster? The girl put 2 full boxes of relaxer bc she said my hair went back to natural when I put the weave. Huh?
I learned my lesson. Make sure u relax at least 2 wks after u take out braids/weave. And detangle, wash and Deep Condition before you get a relaxer or putting back on braids/weave again.

 

[anon123]

Knots on ends...a way to avoid them if you plait/braid is NOT to braid down to the tips of the hair. Your hair WILL stay plaited, you can "seal" the ends by putting on a heavier oil, if there was even tension all the way down, I've found.

This I think is really true. I often see the advice to braid down to the end to "protect" the ends. But when I twist (I don't braid), I find that the ends of my twists want to knot up the most. If I leave the bottom 1/4" out and just put on castor oil to help prevent knotting, I get less knotting and tangling than I do when I twist to the very end.

 

[BSweet]

Plz make sure you detangle, wash your hair, and prepare your hair before you get a relaxer.
Stupid me wore a full weaves for 2 months. Took it out, and put on a relaxer the next day without even putting a comb in my hair. Can you say disaster? The girl put 2 full boxes of relaxer bc she said my hair went back to natural when I put the weave. Huh?
I learned my lesson. Make sure u relax at least 2 wks after u take out braids/weave. And detangle, wash and Deep Condition before you get a relaxer or putting back on braids/weave again.

My stylist would do this when i was growing up..i would put in braids every summer..and would go get my relaxer before school started..she would say im natural now since i had braids in and had to apply it to my whole head..

i think that was the real cause of my thin hair growing up...

if only i knew..

 

[wavezncurlz]

Everyone keeps saying protein is bad when overused. I know Henna has protein. What else and how can you tell if a product has protein?

 

[30something]

Everyone keeps saying protein is bad when overused. I know Henna has protein. What else and how can you tell if a product has protein?

Usually says Hydrolyzed or Amino acid, Hydrolyzed Silk, Hydrolyzed Wheat Protein, Collagen Amino Acids. I know Silk, Wheat, Soy, Keratin Collegen are a few, thats all i know.

 

[jamaraa]

This I think is really true. I often see the advice to braid down to the end to "protect" the ends. But when I twist (I don't braid), I find that the ends of my twists want to knot up the most. If I leave the bottom 1/4" out and just put on castor oil to help prevent knotting, I get less knotting and tangling than I do when I twist to the very end.

I thought of you when I wrote about single strand knots. I haven't seen you talk much about getting them so much for a long time. I don't know why they say work a plait/braid/twist to the ends because there are much better ways of protecting your ends by simply "hiding them".

Castor is a perfect oil for this cuz it's got that nice sticky quality. Butters are good for this too. If I'm gonna use a butter on my head, the ends are where I would put it.

 

[jamaraa]

Everyone keeps saying protein is bad when overused. I know Henna has protein. What else and how can you tell if a product has protein?

Henna does not have protein in it's make up, but it can act as a protein on some heads. People use henna for its strenghtening properites/benefits because the molecules of the plant become a part of your hair strand and "fills in the blanks" at points where the strand is or has become weak. Protein products are used for similar reasons.

You can use both henna and protein together (some people actually mix up henna w/ an egg...don't try that one at home ) and have no problems, but on African textures I'd say put time between it. Let's say 2-4 weeks (or even more as needed) between a henna and a protein treatment.

Almost anytime you see the word "fortifying", "strengthening", "reconstruct", "silk", "collagen", and certainly "keratin" you can be quite sure that is a product where protein is a feature. Not all proteins are as "hard" as others. I tend to stay in the "silk protein" neighborhood and rarely venture to Aphogee Two Step town. When I do Aphogee, I follow the directions to the letter and I have no problems, but I use it "as needed" but no more than this.

 

[jamaraa]

Plz make sure you detangle, wash your hair, and prepare your hair before you get a relaxer.
Stupid me wore a full weaves for 2 months. Took it out, and put on a relaxer the next day without even putting a comb in my hair. Can you say disaster? The girl put 2 full boxes of relaxer bc she said my hair went back to natural when I put the weave. Huh?
I learned my lesson. Make sure u relax at least 2 wks after u take out braids/weave. And detangle, wash and Deep Condition before you get a relaxer or putting back on braids/weave again.

Very good advice about waiting between braids/weaves/etc and a relaxer. For starters, you have to let your scalp rest after the take down process.

I'm intrigued by this "natural" comment after only 2 months. LOL...that's way too short a time for you to be natural or even have major "stretching" ng. Was the stylist saying you had dreds and/or mats? It perfectly possible to get dreds under weaves in such little time because your hair was undisturbed for that whole time.

I can't believe she used 2 boxes of relaxer on you....sheesh. That sounds like a whole head relaxer and product overkill. I can't see that there's any reason to put an extra box of relaxer on unless your hair is super long and virgin. All you needed was some combs, oil, and water to rid yourself of you matted hair 1st. Her approach was pure Disaster City.

 

[JollyGal]

Awesome thread.

You know what's best for your hair so listen to it. PJisms are ok for short term but long term... I don't think so.

Mix all natural products before putting it on to your hair (like bananas + honey lol).

Eat well sleep well live well and drink well

If you have extended hair take time when taking out the hair. Even if you have to cancel a social appointment to do your hair DO IT. Your hair will never forgive you if you yank it out

 

[bestblackgirl]

Very good advice about waiting between braids/weaves/etc and a relaxer. For starters, you have to let your scalp rest after the take down process.

I'm intrigued by this "natural" comment after only 2 months. LOL...that's way too short a time for you to be natural or even have major "stretching" ng. Was the stylist saying you had dreds and/or mats? It perfectly possible to get dreds under weaves in such little time because your hair was undisturbed for that whole time.

I can't believe she used 2 boxes of relaxer on you....sheesh. That sounds like a whole head relaxer and product overkill. I can't see that there's any reason to put an extra box of relaxer on unless your hair is super long and virgin. All you needed was some combs, oil, and water to rid yourself of you matted hair 1st. Her approach was pure Disaster City.

I think it was all knotted bc I didn't comb for 2 months under the weave. So I guess all the shed hair and knot made it look very weird. I was 4 months after taking out the weave. It was dry and LOOKED like I was natural. But if I washed it, it would have turned back to normal relaxed look.

 

[DaPPeR]

bumping...................

 

[-Kąditty-]

Never fall asleep with an egg treatment in your hair.

yea...that didn't end so well. My hair was soooo tangled and matted together...hard as a brick...just a mess. I had to cut most of it off.

I actually pitied myself and that is something I never do.

 

[Chevelure618]

Setback Preventor:

When you have a period of amazing progress, don't play in it, admire it, rollerset, flat-iron it to death. Admire it thru a couple of shampoos (one week) and put it back up. Try to ignore the new length and keep moisturizing the ends.

 

[Live4Me]

This is a great thread!!! Since I am still new here, I will post about what I know are setbacks I had as a newbie:

1. Do NOT sit under the dryer with any combo of egg treatments. Breakfast in my hair.
2. I always thought I was weird because my hair grew in a "V". You are not alone! One section/side of your hair MAY grow faster than another. You are not required to trim ALL uneveness. You can wait until all sections/sides of your hair are a certain length and then trim to the shortest section. **Or you can give straight styles a rest. Curly styles often mask uneven hair.**
3. Cowashing and french braids are a lazy girl's dream. I know I looked a donkey at 25 wearing two french braids for 4 months every day but my hair recovered from excessive heat usage.
4. Lastly, PLEASE do SOMETHING to your hair while it's in a sew-in. Ignoring it is NOT an OPTION. Giving it "a rest" doesn't mean go on "hiatus"!!!

 

[moonglowdiva]

This is a great thread!!! Since I am still new here, I will post about what I know are setbacks I had as a newbie:

1. Do NOT sit under the dryer with any combo of egg treatments. Breakfast in my hair.
2. I always thought I was weird because my hair grew in a "V". You are not alone! One section/side of your hair MAY grow faster than another. You are not required to trim ALL uneveness. You can wait until all sections/sides of your hair are a certain length and then trim to the shortest section. **Or you can give straight styles a rest. Curly styles often mask uneven hair.**
3. Cowashing and french braids are a lazy girl's dream. I know I looked a donkey at 25 wearing two french braids for 4 months every day but my hair recovered from excessive heat usage.
4. Lastly, PLEASE do SOMETHING to your hair while it's in a sew-in. Ignoring it is NOT an OPTION. Giving it "a rest" doesn't mean go on "hiatus"!!!

@ bolded oh no you didn'terplexed I once forgot and rinsed my hair with warm water. I know we know now.

 

[laurend]

I'm late for this thread, anyway two thoughts:

1. If you are having major hair loss, get to the doctor asap. A lot of our members put this off looking for hair advice here and it might be the complete opposite of what is happening to you.
2. Usually the KISS method is the best. We don't see members losing hair from this.

 

[LatterGlory]

I haven't read all of the responses, so hopefully my tips have not been mentioned:

1) It takes time and patience to grow hair; there are no short-cuts. In fact, looking for a short-cut may equal looking for a setback.

2) After putting in all the time and hard work necessary to retain considerable length, stay away from people who want to cut your hair if you don't want it cut. It angers me every time I read a thread about someone who trusted a stylist and walked out of the salon with 3-5 inches of their hair on the floor.

3) Direct heat is not your friend and should be used in moderation...especially if your hair is already chemically-treated. Personally, I have taken the extreme stance of never planning to use direct heat again, mainly because I'm texlaxed and believe that heat and chemicals don't mix.

^^^ . If a straighter look is what you want try setting with really big rollers and then wrap. ( JMHO)

 

[hillytmj]

I love this thread! Thanks for starting, Iris!

A few things I've learned:
-Like others, don't rush through your hair ritual or force yourself to do it when you are "tired." I haven't had a setback from this, but reading about other people who have suffered from setbacks in this area makes me feel better about being lazy some days.
-Don't be afraid to trim if you need to. I recently cut two inches necessarily, and it seemed to grow back pretty quickly. If had held onto those fried ends, I would have created a setback and possibly lost even more length.
-State your trimming wishes before a stylist starts working on your hair. I've no longer had the "surprise trim" every since I started telling them upfront, "no trim please" and reminding them when they sit me in the chair.
-Frizzy, dry ends don't always = damaged ends. You may just need a good moisturizer.
-Finally, don't let someone else determine if "your ends are bad." That seems to be a stylist's trap for getting you to agree to an unnecessary trim.

 

[LatterGlory]

Do a protein treatment ( I dc with AO GPB ) one week before and 1-2 weeks after you relax or texlax.

Protect already relaxed hair.

Section and detangle your hair and base your scalp before going to the salon for a relaxer.

Time your processing and insist the relaxer be washed out when time is up!

If at all possible go to the salon on a day when they're not usually busy.

Never let an emotionally upset stylist in your hair, ( just reschedule ).

 

[isabella09]

Fantastic thread!

 

[Zawaj]

Just bumping

 

[testimony777]

Don't lie to yourself about your hair's limits.
If you know that your hair hates glycerin, don't buy that glycerin-rich moisturizer and tell yourself that it'll be okay, just because you heard rave reviews about it. It's okay to put it down and walk away.

If you know that your hair hates heat, don't flat iron on 400 degrees because it gives Mary beautiful results.

It only takes one bad product/styling choice to give you a setback, and I learned that the hard way.

I just want to second this, especially the bold portion. For us naturals who like to change it up and wear our hair straight it can feel like a defeating blow to find out that your hair really does not do well with heat. Once you figure this out though it is best to walk away from the flat iron. For some this may mean finding creative low heat ways of straightening but for other it may mean letting go of the sleek look all together. In the end, if your goal is to have healthy long hair, it is worth it.

Also, stick to what works. If weekly deep treatments have played a crucial role in getting your hair healthy and helping you retaining length don't stop doing them because your hair looks great and it seems it doesn't need them anymore. The steps you've taken to get that beautiful head of hair are the steps you will likely need to keep in place to keep that beautiful head of hair.

 

[goodmorningruby]

This is such a great thread, I wanted to BUMPPPPPPPPPPP

 

[Minty]

bumping for the new year! "Let's be careful out there" - (for all you old heads. LOL)

 

[Chevelure618]

Schedule a hair goal consultation with a new stylist (free of course). Bring in books, articles, quality products you are using and even growth progress shirts. If they get defensive, don't trust them with your hair. If they seem intrigued, or even impressed at your knowledge about healthy hair care you've got a keeper.

Make sure to tell them your definition of a "dusting". I told a new stylist that I wanted to come to him but even if he didn't agree about the length of time between trims could he handle humoring me on that issue. Be frank. Blunt. And don't be afraid of the smirks and laughter because those reactions are what's going to save your hair in the long run. That's my setback prevention tip.

 

[sky035]

I used an at home colour (Clairol's Natural Instincts) that ruined my hair's texture and made my dry hair even more dry. After more than a year, I am still trimming off the damaged ends. For me and my hair, this caused a major setback.

 

[LushLox]

This is a great thread! Should be a sticky - everyone should read it!!

 

[ebonimama]

Simple regimen,

co-wash 1xweek, deep condition 20 minutes 1xweek, detangle under running water while rinsing out conditioner. Put hair in pony, baggy pony. Tie down hair (air dry under scarf). Go to bed. Next morning throw on phony bun, pony, half wig and keep it moving. Got me where I am today.