why are most protective hair styles we used considered not having our hair done?

[FineChyna]

in wishin4bls's thread called "my friends think i am crazy" blueabyss said that her man always complains her hair isn't "done".

why is it wearing your hair in buns or nicely styled ponytails is considered as not "having your hair done"? to me not having your hair dones means it looks unkempt or you are walking outside with your hair wrapped up in scarves because it is really not done in any type way.

i also remember awhile back on another board someone said that women should never ever wear there hair pulled in a ponytail or bun because it looks immature and juvenile. this person works HR for their comp and said that she found it absurd when women (especially black women )would come in with their hair pulled back in ponytails or buns because the other women(white, asian or latino), according to her, never wore their hair like that. to me wearing your hair pulled back is a conservative look and the smart thing to do depending where you are applying for a job

i've have heard this statment alot even though ponytails and buns can be dressed up or down to look different so why is it not considered a "hairstyle". furthermore why do we get more slack over that hair style but none if we came out with some rainbow brite style weaves? to me a ponytail/bun would look way better than having jesse jackson's rainbow coalition perched in my head :-/

any thoughts on why people are so anti pony?

 

[myco]

in wishin4bls's thread called "my friends think i am crazy" blueabyss said that her man always complains her hair isn't "done".

why is it wearing your hair in buns or nicely styled ponytails is considered as not "having your hair done"? to me not having your hair dones means it looks unkempt or you are walking outside with your hair wrapped up in scarves because it is really not done in any type way.

i also remember awhile back on another board someone said that women should never ever wear there hair pulled in a ponytail or bun because it looks immature and juvenile. this person works HR for their comp and said that she found it absurd when women (especially black women )would come in with their hair pulled back in ponytails or buns because the other women(white, asian or latino), according to her, never wore their hair like that. to me wearing your hair pulled back is a conservative look and the smart thing to do depending where you are applying for a job

i've have heard this statment alot even though ponytails and buns can be dressed up or down to look different so why is it not considered a "hairstyle". furthermore why do we get more slack over that hair style but none if we came out with some rainbow brite style weaves? to me a ponytail/bun would look way better than having jesse jackson's rainbow coalition perched in my head :-/

any thoughts on why people are so anti pony?

Good question. Freeze curls and stacked waves that you need a power drill to penetrate are okay, but a neat bun isn't? I guess people have become so conditioned to black women having such complicated hairstyles, that anything less equals undone.

 

[jaded_faerie]

Good question. Freeze curls and stacked waves that you need a power drill to penetrate are okay, but a neat bun isn't? I guess people have become so conditioned to black women having such complicated hairstyles, that anything less equals undone.

I agree with this statement.

 

[CurleeDST]

For me pony tails and buns are booooorrrrriiinnnggggg

in wishin4bls's thread called "my friends think i am crazy" blueabyss said that her man always complains her hair isn't "done".

why is it wearing your hair in buns or nicely styled ponytails is considered as not "having your hair done"? to me not having your hair dones means it looks unkempt or you are walking outside with your hair wrapped up in scarves because it is really not done in any type way.

i also remember awhile back on another board someone said that women should never ever wear there hair pulled in a ponytail or bun because it looks immature and juvenile. this person works HR for their comp and said that she found it absurd when women (especially black women )would come in with their hair pulled back in ponytails or buns because the other women(white, asian or latino), according to her, never wore their hair like that. to me wearing your hair pulled back is a conservative look and the smart thing to do depending where you are applying for a job

i've have heard this statment alot even though ponytails and buns can be dressed up or down to look different so why is it not considered a "hairstyle". furthermore why do we get more slack over that hair style but none if we came out with some rainbow brite style weaves? to me a ponytail/bun would look way better than having jesse jackson's rainbow coalition perched in my head :-/

any thoughts on why people are so anti pony?

 

[FineChyna]

Good question. Freeze curls and stacked waves that you need a power drill to penetrate are okay, but a neat bun isn't? I guess people have become so conditioned to black women having such complicated hairstyles, that anything less equals undone.

great summary

 

[FineChyna]

For me pony tails and buns are booooorrrrriiinnnggggg

yeh but you really make a big stink over the next person who likes them and consider their hair being undone? probably not.

 

[CurleeDST]

No, you are right. But I wear pony tails at the gym or when I workout and run so I am sooo bored with them b/c with all of the sweating that is the only way I can wear my hair since I wet it daily to rinse out the sweat.

I think buns are ultra conservative.

yeh but you really make a big stink over the next person who likes them and consider their hair being undone? probably not.

 

[FineChyna]

i know one time a male friend told me a woman is not a real women unless she wore her hair down. he said pony's are for "little girls" lol. again that seems like utter insanity because hair is hair. as long as its neat and clean who cares really

 

[Ariana4000]

Why are we the only women that HAVE to have our hair "DONE" in the first place? My friends of other nationalities do not run to the salon every two weeks like we black women do. I like my buns.

 

[FineChyna]

No, you are right. But I wear pony tails at the gym or when I workout and run so I am sooo bored with them b/c with all of the sweating that is the only way I can wear my hair since I wet it daily to rinse out the sweat.

I think buns are ultra conservative.

i can understand why they are not for everyone but i can tell by your response that you don't consider them less of hairstyle either. some people get highly upset over pony's and buns like its the worse hair style you can wear, which i think is extreme

 

[FineChyna]

Why are we the only women that HAVE to have our hair "DONE" in the first place? My friends of other nationalities do not run to the salon every two weeks like we black women do. I like my buns.

i was never raised to hit the salon every 2 weeks and my mom wasn't in there like that either, so me going to a salon every 2 weeks is not normal nor was it something i saw in my household although my cousins and aunts went very regularly. i am content with buns and pony's and only go to the salon when i want something special but i don't trust them with my hair so i haven't been back since march

 

[krissyprissy]

The bun is neat and nice hair style to me. I just saw a white woman with a slick bun wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase on tv. She looked great

Some folks just have not come to the light yet.

 

[ART11]

I never knew this. I wear a bun frequently. I don't care too much for ponys but I have seen some that look very cute. As well, I even see folks coming out of the salon with them. I don't like those 6 am stiff ski jump ponys that some folks wear - that IS not having their hair done but there is a difference between that and a nicely coiffed pony. Why do so many brides wear buns then? Some folks just shouldn't be allowed to speak

 

[nomoweavesfome]

i also remember awhile back on another board someone said that women should never ever wear there hair pulled in a ponytail or bun because it looks immature and juvenile. this person works HR for their comp and said that she found it absurd when women (especially black women )would come in with their hair pulled back in ponytails or buns because the other women(white, asian or latino), according to her, never wore their hair like that. to me wearing your hair pulled back is a conservative look and the smart thing to do depending where you are applying for a job


hmm- now I wonder why for the last 6 interviews I went on with my white counterparts, is the reason for not getting the job. I thought the bun was a sign of conservatism myself.

 

[caligirl]

i also remember awhile back on another board someone said that women should never ever wear there hair pulled in a ponytail or bun because it looks immature and juvenile. this person works HR for their comp and said that she found it absurd when women (especially black women )would come in with their hair pulled back in ponytails or buns because the other women(white, asian or latino), according to her, never wore their hair like that.

I wonder if this same lady would say that black women shouldn't wear fros or twists to work because "white women never wear their hair like that."

 

[FineChyna]

hmm- now I wonder why for the last 6 interviews I went on with my white counterparts, is the reason for not getting the job. I thought the bun was a sign of conservatism myself.

i doubt it althought it could be possible. i know i read her post 2 days before i had an interview and wore my hair down and was not received well by the interviewer.

i went back to the bun and the next interview(different job same comp) the woman seemed very nice but i still didn't get the job

 

[FineChyna]

I wonder if this same lady would say that black women shouldn't wear fros or twists to work because "white women never wear their hair like that."

no she addressed that by saying that if there was no perms, heating tools or chemicals black women would all have twist, locs, fros because that is the natural state of our hair, but she just hates ponys/buns because she feels they are childlike and doesn't see other races wearing the "childike" hair do to interviews. *shrug*

but her stance on ponys/buns and no in the minority from my experience. i have been asked numerous times by men and women why i never get my hair "done" to me it is done...

 

[MizAvalon]

I think that buns couldn't be less juvenile or immature. Honestly I think a bun is the most conservative and "old lady-ish" hairstyle there is, was, and ever will be. I know it's certainly my go-to style when I want to look a little extra serious. A bun juvenile and immature? Um yeah, how many little girls do you see walking around with their hair in BUNS?

Ponytails on the other hand can look juvenile, IMO. Or at the very least, a little too casual. However, even those can be dressed up some.

 

[asubeauty]

I think that buns couldn't be less juvenile or immature. Honestly I think a bun is the most conservative and "old lady-ish" hairstyle there is, was, and ever will be. I know it's certainly my go-to style when I want to look a little extra serious. A bun juvenile and immature? Um yeah, how many little girls do you see walking around with their hair in BUNS?

Ponytails on the other hand can look juvenile, IMO. Or at the very least, a little too casual. However, even those can be dressed up some.

I agree with the bolded part. I don't think that buns and ponytails are juvenile or undone. I've seen some very neat ponies and buns. I have a friend who has almost BSL hair and sometimes wears her hair in in a low pony with a deep side part that looks so sophisticated to me. I get compliments on my buns sometimes (but I will admit that I only wear them when I can't do ANYTHING else to my hair).

Why can the women who have two packs of Yaki wrapped around a tiny bun, secured with 762974299435 hair pins, and frozen in place with so much spritz they choke you be considered done, but a neat bun or pony is not done??

Maybe because some women would consider a pony or bun a last result instead of a neat or conservative look. IDK

 

[camellia]

I wear a bun or french twist just about every day. They are some of the most conservative hairstyles around. They can also look very sophisticated with a simple but elegant comb or a few decorative hair pins.

A ponytail is more of a casual style, but even a simple ponytail can be "dressed up" if it is worn low, below the nape of the neck and held with a nice barrette or instead of a regular ponytail holder.

I guess I just don't understand the whole "getting your hair done" thing.

 

[IrisDaVirus]

Good question. Freeze curls and stacked waves that you need a power drill to penetrate are okay, but a neat bun isn't? I guess people have become so conditioned to black women having such complicated hairstyles, that anything less equals undone.

Very well said.

 

[KiniKakes]

It's funny (actually ironic) because.... before the hair boards and my healthy hair journey begin, I used to be one of those folks who looked "down" on women who always wore buns/ponytails. *shrug* I think I perceived it as a "lazy" hair style, and just figured they hadnt taken the time to properly wrap their hair that night, thus making it difficult to wear down/fall nicely. I perceived ponytails as very tomboyish, and viewed this style as sloppy and careless/untidy in appearance. [This was excluding the women who wore a neat, sleek chignon that looked pretty and polished] My disgust was for those women whose hair looked like it had been thrown into a messy bun or ponytail (similar to how my hair looks on a daily basis now, lolol).

It never ONCE occurred to me that these women could be wearing their hair up deliberately, to protect it. I felt esp. disgusted when i saw that some of these women had long hair.... I just couldnt figure out why they would "waste" it by hiding it all the time.

In retrospect, i guess that's why they DID have long hair! LOL!! Because they were wise enough to protect it frequently during the week, rather than wearing it down everyday, ends rubbing agains their coats/fabric all willy nilly (the way I used to.... like a fool!). Today I have a TOTALLY different perception of buns/ponytails. Not only do i respect it tremendously as a protective style during growth.... but i also dont mind how it looks. To me, buns look "sophisticated" and "conservative".... and ponytails look "cute" and "youthful." Either way, i've done like a complete 180..... and its so funny, because just a couple of years ago i was one of those "snobs" who thought in order to be cute/stylish a woman had to wear her hair down.

My, how things change!!!!

 

[shunta]

It's funny (actually ironic) because.... before the hair boards and my healthy hair journey begin, I used to be one of those folks who looked "down" on women who always wore buns/ponytails. *shrug* I think I perceived it as a "lazy" hair style, and just figured they hadnt taken the time to properly wrap their hair that night, thus making it difficult to wear down/fall nicely. I perceived ponytails as very tomboyish, and viewed this style as sloppy and careless/untidy in appearance. [This was excluding the women who wore a neat, sleek chignon that looked pretty and polished] My disgust was for those women whose hair looked like it had been thrown into a messy bun or ponytail (similar to how my hair looks on a daily basis now, lolol).

It never ONCE occurred to me that these women could be wearing their hair up deliberately, to protect it. I felt esp. disgusted when i saw that some of these women had long hair.... I just couldnt figure out why they would "waste" it by hiding it all the time.

In retrospect, i guess that's why they DID have long hair! LOL!! Because they were wise enough to protect it frequently during the week, rather than wearing it down everyday, ends rubbing agains their coats/fabric all willy nilly (the way I used to.... like a fool!). Today I have a TOTALLY different perception of buns/ponytails. Not only do i respect it tremendously as a protective style during growth.... but i also dont mind how it looks. To me, buns look "sophisticated" and "conservative".... and ponytails look "cute" and "youthful." Either way, i've done like a complete 180..... and its so funny, because just a couple of years ago i was one of those "snobs" who thought in order to be cute/stylish a woman had to wear her hair down.

My, how things change!!!!

ITA agree with EVERYTHING you said. I feel like such a snob, thinking that way for all these years. Im one of those women who wear my hair in a messy updo now, and I totally love it. I guess I just had some growing up to do, and a whole lot of learning to do.

 

[Much2much41]

I went to a stylist and requested a bun, and she asked if she could actually curl and style my hair, because she didn't feel as if she had "done" my hair if I only got a bun erplexed

 

[Country gal]

I noticed men really liked it when my hair was freshly styled from the beauty salon. I wear my hair now in mostly afro puffs or twists. I think pony tails can be very sexy. I love a bun. Good question and thread.

 

[InJesusName]

I guess I must be in the process of reforming. I am slowly changing my views about buns/ponytails. Since being on this board, I now realize that this is a style with purpose, so I have begun to embrace this philosophy. Like others have stated, I would see a woman with long hair who pinned up her hair and wonder why she did that. I would think "If my hair was that long, I would wear it down everyday and show my length!" That's probably why I never could get my hair past SL.

I still don't favor buns, but I have found creative ways to wear ponies and buns. Lately, I will wear a phony pony low (at the nape) then pin it up and hold it with one of theose alligator clips. This makes it look a lot less like a pony tail, and more sophisticated. I get compliments on this style A LOT. I am working on an album and will be sure to include photos of this.

Now that I know the purpose of protective styling, I am more willing to look for ways to make myslef like them.

 

[Tee]

Very Good Thread. I know people wonder if you have something going on in your life or do you need money to get your hair fixed when you wear buns. I use to wear my hair down and wrapped all the time. I wear buns now and I know they think I probably ran out of money or something. lol But I am going to reach my goal. Bun and all!

 

[SignatureBeauty]

I Love Wearing a Bun! I have never had any bad experience with a Bun, I seem to get alot of compliments when I wear a bun, But I guess alot of us have alot of growing to do when it comes to hair, and Yes I am lazy and I don't like to comb my hair, I can't wait to see what they say when I get a Big *** Fro and just wake up pick & go LOL!!!!!!

But I wear scarves to from time to time well in the summer I did because the heat was wrecking my Twa. But I think Buns & Ponytails can look very Sexy & Elegant.
But some Men just like that Fresh from the Beauty Salon Hair every week or 2 weeks.

 

[Curlee_lurker]

I get more compliments from my deep parted, ultra low, sock bun than any other hairstyle I do. I will admit I feel more "done" if I have on earrings and at least some lipgloss though.

When someone wears their hair the same way every single day I do attribute it to laziness and a lack of creativity, whether it be a magenta phony pony, a bouncy wrap or a messy ponytail.

 

[SignatureBeauty]

Well Call me Lazy because I don't have time to change my hair everyday, I am trying to make it Last LOL!!!!!