Blessed626
New Member
So, last night my best friend finally came out and told me that he’s gay. I was not surprised, as I’ve felt this was the case since the first day I met him. However, he always denied it and I did not feel that our friendship was based on his sexuality so I never pressured him to admit anything. He’s always caught a lot of flack because of his effeminate ways, and I never wanted to be one of those people who judged him. I love him and know him like the back of my hand. Because we’re so close I always get a feeling when something’s not right with him (I guess it’s like female intuition). For the past 1.5 years or so I noticed a difference in his behavior and I knew that he had finally come to terms with his homosexuality. Honestly, I grew frustrated and bitter towards him because his behavior led him to lie and made me feel like he couldn’t trust me. But I knew that this situation was not about me…it is about him. I knew that eventually he would come to grips with everything and come out and tell me. So yesterday that time came.
Our conversation started with him stating that he knows he’s not where he needs to be with God. He’s a pastor’s son, so that brings a whole different level of pain I suppose. I was explaining to Him that God knows all about Him and loves him regardless. I told him that he just needs to let God know everything that’s on his heart…to become completely transparent. That was when he came clean. He told me that he does not want to be this way. He knows that this is not of God, but the desires are still there. He says that he wants to fight it because he wants to live a life that is pleasing to God. He wants to feel at peace with himself and with God.
I’ve never encountered anything like this personally. All I knew to do was to tell him that I have enough faith to believe that God can deliver him. I also told him that he needs to start reading the Word so that when Satan comes against him, he can fight with some power.
However, as I was talking to him I realized that I have some doubt myself. I believe that honesty is important in order to grow to be where you need to be. So I’ll be honest and share my thoughts in the hopes that someone can help both me and him get through this.
Here goes:
1. I don’t have that much faith in this area. It’s easier for me to believe that God can truly deliver someone from lying or alcohol addiction or fornication, than homosexuality. I know this is wrong but that’s what I feel.
2. I feel so much pain because I want my friend, whom I love like myself, to live a happy life where he doesn’t have to question himself in such a way.
3. Did God create him this way? If so, why? Why would He allow his children to struggle with this? Again, I know this is wrong as well.
4. Where do I begin to help him? I have never had homosexual urges and I can’t pretend to understand where he’s coming from.
5. What are some steps he can take towards wholeness? I believe he wants to be saved…and I believe in the power of the Holy Spirit, but what are some day-to-day steps he can take to overcome this?
All of this is so overwhelming. I really want my friend to feel whole and to know and believe that God does love him. Does anyone have any advice for the both of us to cope with this? Thanks in advance.
Our conversation started with him stating that he knows he’s not where he needs to be with God. He’s a pastor’s son, so that brings a whole different level of pain I suppose. I was explaining to Him that God knows all about Him and loves him regardless. I told him that he just needs to let God know everything that’s on his heart…to become completely transparent. That was when he came clean. He told me that he does not want to be this way. He knows that this is not of God, but the desires are still there. He says that he wants to fight it because he wants to live a life that is pleasing to God. He wants to feel at peace with himself and with God.
I’ve never encountered anything like this personally. All I knew to do was to tell him that I have enough faith to believe that God can deliver him. I also told him that he needs to start reading the Word so that when Satan comes against him, he can fight with some power.
However, as I was talking to him I realized that I have some doubt myself. I believe that honesty is important in order to grow to be where you need to be. So I’ll be honest and share my thoughts in the hopes that someone can help both me and him get through this.
Here goes:
1. I don’t have that much faith in this area. It’s easier for me to believe that God can truly deliver someone from lying or alcohol addiction or fornication, than homosexuality. I know this is wrong but that’s what I feel.
2. I feel so much pain because I want my friend, whom I love like myself, to live a happy life where he doesn’t have to question himself in such a way.
3. Did God create him this way? If so, why? Why would He allow his children to struggle with this? Again, I know this is wrong as well.
4. Where do I begin to help him? I have never had homosexual urges and I can’t pretend to understand where he’s coming from.
5. What are some steps he can take towards wholeness? I believe he wants to be saved…and I believe in the power of the Holy Spirit, but what are some day-to-day steps he can take to overcome this?
All of this is so overwhelming. I really want my friend to feel whole and to know and believe that God does love him. Does anyone have any advice for the both of us to cope with this? Thanks in advance.
. Now if you keep ignoring the correction of God, he will leave you to your own devices. IOW, you can receive a reprobate mind and be truly convinced that you are ok when you are far from it! God will not force you to do anything against your own will ever. Even if doing the things will eventually result in your death or the death of others you are responsible for. First physical, then eternal. 
