Calling all 4b's that stretch their relaxers

[missjoey]

I need your help.

The back of my hair is trying to dread. I have 4b very course thick new growth. I'm passed armpit length. I have been streching for 11 weeks and my hair is becoming more and more unmanigable. I'm barely shedding but the tangles and knots on my hair strands are making my hair come out. I need some serious advice.

I co-wash about twice a week. I shampoo wash and then deep condition once a week. I only comb my hair on wash days and it's such a hard task. Has anybody else experienced this? I make sure I moisturize and seal with oil everyday.

I just can't take it anymore. I may have to perm it this weekend if I can't find a solution. This is my first official stretch and I have noticed my hair is so much thicker, healthier and longer. How are you guys keeping your hair under control? How are you avoiding the knots and tangles? TIAerplexed

 

[Radianthealth]

I use Aveda Damage Remedy. I know people are getting sick of me giving this as the solution for everything but detangling is key.

I also use Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. This is a great detangler as well as S-Curl. I use a seamless comb and I don't have any knots or tangling. I hope this helps

 

[beana]

Sever knotting and tangling can ruin your hair.. id try to see whether streching so long is necessary first. Maybe 10 weeks is more ideal for you. Alos, if your hair is very matted you're going to run into a lot of problems applying the relaxer.

In the meantime id deep condition and detangle one more time and get a relaxer.

I'm a 4a and have stretched up to 16 weeks, but wouldn't do it again. every 10-13 weeks is good for me because i dont have any issues with breakage knotting and tangling during this period

 

[RabiaElaine]

How do you wash your hair?

You might want to try the Crown and Glory method for washing your hair (braiding it up into 4-6 large braids while washing and only take them down when the conditioner has been in for a while).

S-curl is great for detangling! Also use a shower comb to detangle. Keep your roots well moisturized.

 

[shunta]

Sever knotting and tangling can ruin your hair.. id try to see whether streching so long is necessary first. Maybe 10 weeks is more ideal for you. Alos, if your hair is very matted you're going to run into a lot of problems applying the relaxer.

In the meantime id deep condition and detangle one more time and get a relaxer.

I'm a 4a and have stretched up to 16 weeks, but wouldn't do it again. every 10-13 weeks is good for me because i dont have any issues with breakage knotting and tangling during this period

I agree. I mean you dont wanna do more harm than good. I understand that stretching is strongly encouraged, but you dont want to damage your hair trying to fight with tangles and knots, either. Just my opinion.

BTW, I can only stretch to 10 wks since its more ideal for my own hair. You just gotta find what works for you (as far as streching is concerned).

 

[TLC1020]

I just make sure that I deep condition under the drying & aid oil as well..
I also wash and condition in the shower so there are less tangles..
I stretch my relaxers no more than 12 weeks b/c at 10 weeks my hair begin to curl at the root and for me that is where the tangles begin.. Maybe you should relax now and try to stretch a week longer next time and work your way up by starting with slow stretches. HTH

 

[janeemat]

Try using a mixture of oils such as olive oil, jojoba oil,sweet almond oil and coconut oil as a prepoo. Do not put it on too heavy because it will run. You may even want to mix it with a good moisturizing cond, put on a plastic cap and go under the dryer for a least 30 min. Comb through it before you proceed to poo. My hair tried to lock around 12 wks on my last stretch, but using oil allowed me to go 14 wks.

 

[Serenity_Peace]

I use Aveda Damage Remedy. I know people are getting sick of me giving this as the solution for everything but detangling is key.

I also use Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. This is a great detangler as well as S-Curl. I use a seamless comb and I don't have any knots or tangling. I hope this helps

Yes!!! She ain't neva lied! BOTH Aveda and Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangler is DA BOMB!!!!!!! Please trust me on this. Trimbride knows what she's talking about. If you do nothing else, please run to your nearest BSS and pick up the Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. Do it NOW! You won't regret it...I hope...

 

[locabouthair]

How do you wash your hair?

You might want to try the Crown and Glory method for washing your hair (braiding it up into 4-6 large braids while washing and only take them down when the conditioner has been in for a while).

S-curl is great for detangling! Also use a shower comb to detangle. Keep your roots well moisturized.

im 4b too and s curl works great for stretching. for the tangles. maybe u should try a dominican rinse. it melted my tangles away. i use nacidit olive oil rinse.

 

[missjoey]

You ladies are the bomb. LOL!! Thanks for the great advice! I was thinking, "Why me?" I honestly thought that only I had this problem glad to know that there are sisters out there dealing with the same struggle. lol I'm just so annoyed by this. I guess I'll DC tomorrow and relax it this weekend. Wish me luck. This is gonna be my first self relaxer attempt. I hope to God that my hair doesn't turn out like this when I'm done: LOL!!!erplexed

 

[LadyZ]

You might need some protein products too ...

 

[bablou00]

I agree w/ the Aveda ladies but it doesnt get all my 4b 5mos post tangles out. This is what I do. Wash w/ Aveda. I dont comb in the shower. I have a detangling comb but I dont like to see more hair then I have to so no combing in the shower, after leave in or when dry is working for me. Unless I am rollersetting which is once a week if I have somewhere to go that weekend. So I wait till my hair is completely dry and I use a oil mixture w/ EVOO, Jojoba oil and lavender. I put this thru out my hair and concentrate on areas where my hair is matted the most which is my crown. I use my fingers only and detangle very carefully. Most of the time I only get the hair that is causing the tangles which is shedded hair from not combing. Sometimes I get one or two strands w/ each knot that could not be saved. It might seem like a lot but I've detangled before on wet hair and lost way more hair then I do when its dry and I use my fingers. Sorry that is so long but I learned the hard way w/ my last stretch trying to detangle w/ a comb and vowed that I would never do that again
Patience is the key to stretching and knowing whats right for your hair.
HTH

 

[prospurr4]

Right now, I am almost 12 weeks post, stretching to 13, and I wash once per week (no cowashing).

On washday, I first detangle my hair with my fingers only while it's still dry, carefully removing any shedded strands. I get mininal breakage this way. Once I get a section detangled, I apply my DC (Motions Moisture Plus) mixed with EVOO to that section (like a prepoo), twist it and secure the end with a small barrette. I do this throughout my hair, ending up with 7 twists. I cover with a plastic cap and leave on for approx. 1 hour, then shampoo.

While shampooing and rinsing in the shower, I carefully undo the twists and detangle a little more with my fingers under the shower stream. I then blot excess water with towel, add leave-ins, and then comb with my Jilbere shower comb...that comb just glides right through, new growth and all. Hope this helps!

 

[RabiaElaine]

Yes!!! She ain't neva lied! BOTH Aveda and Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangler is DA BOMB!!!!!!! Please trust me on this. Trimbride knows what she's talking about. If you do nothing else, please run to your nearest BSS and pick up the Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. Do it NOW! You won't regret it...I hope...

Ya know...a friend of mine was using this on her daughter's hair one day. She said that she loves it. I remember looking at the ingredient list and thinking it looks good. Is this good as just a moisturizer too?

 

[RabiaElaine]

I agree w/ the Aveda ladies but it doesnt get all my 4b 5mos post tangles out. This is what I do. Wash w/ Aveda. I dont comb in the shower. I have a detangling comb but I dont like to see more hair then I have to so no combing in the shower, after leave in or when dry is working for me. Unless I am rollersetting which is once a week if I have somewhere to go that weekend. So I wait till my hair is completely dry and I use a oil mixture w/ EVOO, Jojoba oil and lavender. I put this thru out my hair and concentrate on areas where my hair is matted the most which is my crown. I use my fingers only and detangle very carefully. Most of the time I only get the hair that is causing the tangles which is shedded hair from not combing. Sometimes I get one or two strands w/ each knot that could not be saved. It might seem like a lot but I've detangled before on wet hair and lost way more hair then I do when its dry and I use my fingers. Sorry that is so long but I learned the hard way w/ my last stretch trying to detangle w/ a comb and vowed that I would never do that again
Patience is the key to stretching and knowing whats right for your hair.
HTH

Yes detangling with fingers is very good. Sometimes I do this and then move on to my shower comb.

 

[RabiaElaine]

Right now, I am almost 12 weeks post, stretching to 13, and I wash once per week (no cowashing).

On washday, I first detangle my hair with my fingers only while it's still dry, carefully removing any shedded strands. I get mininal breakage this way. Once I get a section detangled, I apply my DC (Motions Moisture Plus) mixed with EVOO to that section (like a prepoo), twist it and secure the end with a small barrette. I do this throughout my hair, ending up with 7 twists. I cover with a plastic cap and leave on for approx. 1 hour, then shampoo.

While shampooing and rinsing in the shower, I carefully undo the twists and detangle a little more with my fingers under the shower stream. I then blot excess water with towel, add leave-ins, and then comb with my Jilbere shower comb...that comb just glides right through, new growth and all. Hope this helps!

This is the comb I use (and I've stretched to 5 months before w/o many issues).

 

[mspm]

I have to agree with prospurr4. Some of us need some extra steps. My hair dreaded when I washed it 2 weeks ago. This week I did some extra steps and viola, no tangles!

First, after combing out tangles prepoo with a good moisturizing conditioner and oil. Then wash with a moisturizing shampoo, and condition again. Afterwards, I used S-Curl but this time I applied like you would a touch-up relaxer - really getting the new growth. After air drying, I moisturized and sealed. HTH!

 

[West Valley]

Right now, I am almost 12 weeks post, stretching to 13, and I wash once per week (no cowashing).

On washday, I first detangle my hair with my fingers only while it's still dry, carefully removing any shedded strands. I get mininal breakage this way. Once I get a section detangled, I apply my DC (Motions Moisture Plus) mixed with EVOO to that section (like a prepoo), twist it and secure the end with a small barrette. I do this throughout my hair, ending up with 7 twists. I cover with a plastic cap and leave on for approx. 1 hour, then shampoo.

While shampooing and rinsing in the shower, I carefully undo the twists and detangle a little more with my fingers under the shower stream. I then blot excess water with towel, add leave-ins, and then comb with my Jilbere shower comb...that comb just glides right through, new growth and all. Hope this helps!

Is there a reason why you dont cowash? I am about 16 weeks post relaxer and about a couple of days ago I started getting major shedding. I refuse to relax my hair before April for several reasons and even at that point I am not sure because I am thinking of transitioning. Anywho, I am trying to experiment with different things to help combat the breakage/shedding and I thought that maybe Im washing too much. I don't know. Just looking for assistance I guess.

 

[MsCounsel]

Yes!!! She ain't neva lied! BOTH Aveda and Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangler is DA BOMB!!!!!!! Please trust me on this. Trimbride knows what she's talking about. If you do nothing else, please run to your nearest BSS and pick up the Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. Do it NOW! You won't regret it...I hope...

On my way.... I have the same problem. Major dreading going on. NOTHING HELPS, DC, Oils, Silicon Mix (used to work), no poo, clarifying poo, . So this really needs to work!!! I ripped out about a fist full of hair. I don't how I have any left. I'm not kidding.

Also: I can't stretch beyond 9 weeks

 

[_belle]

On my way.... I have the same problem. Major dreading going on. NOTHING HELPS, DC, Oils, Silicon Mix (used to work), no poo, clarifying poo, . So this really needs to work!!! I ripped out about a fist full of hair. I don't how I have any left. I'm not kidding.

Also: I can't stretch beyond 9 weeks

this is just random. . . if u are in columbia right now, i'm like 10 minutes from u in burtonsville. lol

 

[MsCounsel]

this is just random. . . if u are in columbia right now, i'm like 10 minutes from u in burtonsville. lol

OT:
I pass by Burtonsville on route 29.

 

[mzhotniz86]

I need your help.

The back of my hair is trying to dread. I have 4b very course thick new growth. I'm passed armpit length. I have been streching for 11 weeks and my hair is becoming more and more unmanigable. I'm barely shedding but the tangles and knots on my hair strands are making my hair come out. I need some serious advice.

I co-wash about twice a week. I shampoo wash and then deep condition once a week. I only comb my hair on wash days and it's such a hard task. Has anybody else experienced this? I make sure I moisturize and seal with oil everyday.

I just can't take it anymore. I may have to perm it this weekend if I can't find a solution. This is my first official stretch and I have noticed my hair is so much thicker, healthier and longer. How are you guys keeping your hair under control? How are you avoiding the knots and tangles? TIAerplexed

stop washing it so much. cut back to washing like once a week or so. the less you mess with it the better until its time for your touch up.

 

[towels62]

for me 9-10 weeks is the limit...I am new here and just learning the ropes.

 

[prospurr4]

for me 9-10 weeks is the limit...I am new here and just learning the ropes.

OT: I see this is your first post, towels, so:

 

[PinkPebbles]

Yes!!! She ain't neva lied! BOTH Aveda and Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangler is DA BOMB!!!!!!! Please trust me on this. Trimbride knows what she's talking about. If you do nothing else, please run to your nearest BSS and pick up the Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion. Do it NOW! You won't regret it...I hope...

After reading this thread today I bought the Africa's best Kids Organic Shea Butter Detangler. My hair is thanking you and Trimbride right now!!! My roots are out of control due to my stretching and I wanted to detangle before I shampoo. I applied the Kids Organic Shea Butter from root to tips and Oh my ...I was able to get my wide tooth comb through my hair without any broken hairs. My hair detangled and soften instantly! My shampoo process should go smoothly tomorrow.

OP- you have to try this product.

 

[NCRapunzel]

My hair is also 4a/b. I just came off of a stretch of nearly 13 weeks. I'd hoped to make it to 16 but I'd started to get tangles by week 10-11. So I broke down and texlaxed in order to keep from losing all of my progress. My hair is short and it was only my second stretch so I figure I'll get better and better at it with time. I currently use Dominican products but I think I'll buy the Aveda and the Shea Butter products to help me out this time.