Natural Hair: The Awkward Stage

[whiteoleander91]

(sorry if there is a thread already like this) Soooo, I am finally past the awkward stage with my hair!! *happy dance* Even though the back still hangs more than the front (the "natural mullet" lol) it is a lot less mullet-ish now, and that means NO MORE HEADBANDS!! I would wear a headband every time I did a wash and go to help bring up the back because there was NO WAY I was cutting perfectly healthy hair since it was all about the same length anyway, just different levels of shrinkage. Just a few days ago, I braved a headband-less wash and go and loved how it looked. Thinking back to when I first went natural and looking at my hair now, I really feel like I'm making progress. And I got so many compliments! I was never one to have bangs, even as a relaxed head, but now I kind of have a side sweep going on. I feel accomplished lol. Just thought I'd share my happiness with you ladies

So my question for you:

How long did it take for you to get past your awkward stage? Did you ever struggle with a "natural mullet"?

 

[destine2grow]

Congrats on getting past the awkward stage. I only have like 3 in. of hair, so I can't comment on getting pass or experiencing the awkward stage.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

My hair is always mulletized as a natchal. I'm not sure why that is. Anyway, what stage exactly is the awkward stage?

 

[KurlyNinja]

I feel like I'm just now leaving the awkward stage. But from 1 yr post relaxer up until about now, my natural hair was just "eh" to me for certain styles. Luckly puffs always seem to save the day.

ETA: And I still have a mullet.

 

[GreenEyedJen]

I think the "awkward stage" differs for everyone. This is due to differences in head and face shape. the amount of shrinkage, if you normally stretch your hair or not, etc. etc. The middle/crown of my head is straight 4b while the rest is a mixture of 4a/3c, so I've come to the conclusion that my hair is probably going to look funny in a WNG for quite some time (the middle always looks smushed in because it shrinks so much more than the rest).

Besides that, though, I think it took about 14 months from my last relaxer to get past MY awkward stage. I'm not sure though, because I don't remember exactly when my last relaxer was. I'm pretty sure I'm about to enter another one, though. I think awkward stages come about more than once during your hairs life (assuming you don't cut it).

 

[PPGbubbles]

I had one bout of awkwardness for about 6 months going from NL to a full SL.

My nape always shoots our first and messes things up! I am going through another one now, My nape is BSL ish but the rest is full APL so I am looking funky again I know this will pass so im gonna be the twistout/tuck and roll queen till my hair evens up

 

[whiteoleander91]

My hair is always mulletized as a natchal. I'm not sure why that is. Anyway, what stage exactly is the awkward stage?

I would say my awkward stage was when I felt I couldn't just wear it down, any kind of "out" style came out gross (still does lol), buns were kind of hard...basically pertaining to length and how styles come out. You know, too short to do this, to layered to do that. Stuck between two different worlds. It felt like I couldn't do anything with my hair!

 

[whiteoleander91]

I had one bout of awkwardness for about 6 months going from NL to a full SL.

My nape always shoots our first and messes things up! I am going through another one now, My nape is BSL ish but the rest is full APL so I am looking funky again I know this will pass so im gonna be the twistout/tuck and roll queen till my hair evens up

@ the bolded! basically this! going from one length to another. My nape is probably 3 or 4 inches away from APL but at my temples I'm just now a little past or resting at CBL. But since my temple shrinks like 75% and nape is more like 50% or 40%... it's awkward lol

 

[Giselle685]

Two years in.. And when my hair is out I take the lead for the term "awkward"

 

[JinaRicci]

My awkward stages came from different growth rates/lengths of hair on my head.

I had: 1) Between BC and being able to pull my hair in a puff (5 mos). I became the Headband queen. 2) Back way longer than the front (~2.5 yrs from BC). This made any attempt at twistouts worthless. Flat iron styles were mostly half up half down.

Now at 3+ years, I really hope they're no more.

 

[WantNatural]

I'm almost two years post BC and my hair's still awkward. And I still have a serious mullet. I just figured out how to wear a twist out so that it looks normal. Before that every attempt ended up in a puff. I've been bunning for months, but have to use weave hair because due to the different lengths and different shrinkage my natural bun is still too small. My nape is APL, sides are CBL, bangs are a few inches below my chin. Hopefully one day I'll grow out of this stage!

 

[HeatherJo]

It took me 2 1/2 years to get through the awkward stage, but I still have a mullet. I hide it just like you did... with headbands. I also hide it by wearing a lot of protective styles and up dos. I've realized that the hair down the middle of my head grows faster than the rest and if I style my hair right you can't even tell. Cuz I'm not cutting perfectly healthy hair to even everything up until I'm ready to straighten my hair which is about 4 months from now.

 

[glamazon386]

I'm not even sure how long it took but that stage was definitely frustrating. I feel your pain OP.

 

[whiteoleander91]

glamazon386 oh yes, it was very painful lol. The awkward stage almost got the best of me. I was really iffy about staying natural for a while. I kept thinking about either texlaxing or completely relaxing it straight again. I was really frustrated. I'm glad I stuck it out

 

[*closer*2*my*dreams*]

Shoot I have a TWA and I feel that's awkward. I can't find anything flattering. Two strand twists look like frizz by the middle of the day. Wash n' gos don't stay defined all day and look like frizz. The moment I use a comb or brush my hair becomes frizz. I'm going to be in sew-ins for a few months, until I get enough length to be able to do something to it.

 

[yaya24]

Totally know what you mean!

I bc'd June 2009 and I am still at an awkward mullet stage

I decided late October (this year) to do a major cut in the back to try and even things out a bit

 

[cami88]

I still struggle with the natural mullet and I'm almost bsl.

 

[justNikki]

Hmmm....I'm on the opposite end of the spectrum. I'm so over long just to be long when it's a mullet. I want my hair to look cute, no matter what. The first time around as a natural after the twa phase, it was awkward for me because of the mullet for at least a year. Then when it started to hang more, I was able to get a lot of cuteness going on. This time around, I refuse to sacrifice length for style. It'll get there, I just want to be cute all the way until I have a curly shoulder length bob and based on past experiences, this means I could be 3 years in before that happens (or longer now that I'm definitely going to keep it shaped up).

 

[brittle_hair]

I feel like i'm at the awkward length which is why i plan to stay braided up till at least end of spring 2012

 

[kinky curlygenie]

my awkward stage ended at about a yr - it really uneven and it hangs differently so it took a long time for me bc like you i was not guna chop off healthy hair lol

 

[lushcoils]

I'll be in twist extensions until I get out of this awkward stage.

 

[nicole625]

I have the opposite of a mullet. My front is much longer than the back and the top is way shorter than the rest of my head look. I want to get a sew in but im terrified of how my hair will respond. I haven't wore a weave in years

 

[MizzBrown]

I'm going through this. I think I'm gonna get some braids but I'll miss being able to wash my hair every other day. I LOVE that part about being natural.

Tired of wearing a puff & afro is just too damn small. The shrinkage is somethin' else.

 

[whiteoleander91]

nicole625 that's how my mom's hair grows. It's always longer in the front and crown, but her hair grows super fast so she seems to get past that quickly (she always cuts it back short though). Lucky ducky lol. I wish my hair grew fast...

What's your shrinkage like?

 

[nicole625]

nicole625 that's how my mom's hair grows. It's always longer in the front and crown, but her hair grows super fast so she seems to get past that quickly (she always cuts it back short though). Lucky ducky lol. I wish my hair grew fast...

What's your shrinkage like?

whiteoleander91, Sounds exactly like my hair, including the fast growth. I let my hair air dry while in flat twists for the past few months so im not sure about my shrinkage.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

I'm still in the awkward stage at nearly 2 years natural. My hair shrinks about 50% so I usually only wear stretched styles. I did wear my shrunken hair to a work meeting about 2 weeks ago. Most people thought I got a hair cut. I pulled down a curl to my arm pit to show one White guy that it's just shrinkage.

At this point I just wear it shrunken or I do a braid out.

Before (Kinky Curly Custard in my hair)

After (I only had stylist blow out my hair and trim the ends). I lightly flat ironed when I got home to let hubby do a visual length check. He was clear that she should not cut off too much....calling and texting while I was at the salon. lol

After light flat iron with Maxiglide (setting 5)

My braid out before and after humidity strikes

 

[whiteoleander91]

beautiful hair! naturalmanenyc