My hairdresser is a HATER

monawalker

monawalker

New Member
o.k. maybe she is not a hater but i don't think she knows what she is talking about. i told her that i plan on going 3 months without a relaxer (may-aug) and the first thing out her mouth was ur hair is gonna fall out. i even ask her assistant and she said the same thing. they gave me no reason why it was gonna fall out. the reason i am kinda mad is because she did not even try to encourage me or anything like that or even say try and see how far you get nothing like that. i thought hairdressers was suppose to give you advice and not just say things without no reason.

I had to vent, i was just a little disappointed.
have anyone else experience anything like dis.
 
You're probably better off coming to this wonderful web site for advice. A lot of hair stylists don't learn some of the things that we (here at the LHCF) already know. You getting relaxer touch-ups every three months would be less money for her. A lot of them are just about the money (which of course is unfortunate - and a darn shame). Do you think you could find one that is more interested in healthy hair? Just a thought.
 
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You getting relaxer touch-ups every three months would be less money for her.

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That's all there is. She probably fretted when you told her that. She ain't stupid, and everyone knows how lousy the economy is right now.
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Watch out! Don't return to a vindictive stylist that you clearly don't like. If you suspect she personally dislikes you and would MAKE your hair fall out just to prove her point, don't go back. If her response bugged you enough to complain on LHCF, your instinct to not trust her is probably right.

It's important to state what you want done on the phone when you set the appointment AND at the start of the salon visit. If you want a wash and set with NO touch up and NO trim, tell her so up front and watch her face for a reaction. Don't let her force services on you that you just don't want right now.

My stylist is open minded, but he's not familiar with a lot of the things we consider here. He can't keep track of all of his clients' personal hair agendas. I've taken more responsibility for at-home care and I've stopped bouncing ideas off of him about products and supplements. I tell him what I want him to know.

You've read Marvin's tips? http://www.macstyle.net/
 
My new hairdresser thinks I'm coming every 6 weeks for retouch
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. I let her think it. I know my minium time is 8 weeks. Her reason is the 2 texture differences will cause breakage, which is true, but I know my hair. And I can go 10-12 weeks without breakage.
 
I agree with HOTCHOCOLATE, I've had stylist that tell me to come in every 6-8 weeks, but I know my hair can go longer so I just come in when I feel I need to. As long as they do their job well otherwise I don't care, though it's always nice to have a stylist that encourages stretching out the relaxer as opposed to making money by telling you to come in every 6 weeks.
Edited to add:
Monawalker, does your stylist do a good job otherwise?
 
Depends on the stylist. I had a stylist tell me that every 6-8 weeks was not necessary for my hair. Then I had some who suggested a touch-up when I hardly had any new growth.
 
Babygirl,

They're looking at the $$$$$$$$$. The more often you come for a relaxer, the more capital that will be for them. That's what that business is all about.

Most women could safely go 8 weeks (at least), but you've never heard a hair-stylist tell you that. Some encourage clients to come in as little as every 4 weeks which is outrageous. I can't even see an accumulation of new growth until about 4 weeks.

Girl, don't get me started!
 
Mona, my styist can be like that too. I've been avoiding her like the plague, cause I don't want to hear her commentary on my newfound hair care regimen. And I don't want that trim she require every second or third time I go there.
Tell you you're tight on cash. Wouldn't she rather have the $50 or so dollars every three months, or have $0 from you once you get too fed up.
I was giving my stylist apx.$85 dollar a month for doing my hair every two weeks and touching up every 6-8. My hair wasn't growing, although it was healthy enough. (Hmmm, what could be the culprit?)I'm sure she misses that money, cause this summer I've been in and out of braids. But if I am to return to her in the fall, she bet' not give me no lip about how often I come or the trims.
 
[ QUOTE ]
Do you think you could find one that is more interested in healthy hair?

[/ QUOTE ]

What folks don't know is if they focused on giving their clients really healthy hair they would have more customers than they would know what to do with!

I have a cousin who does hair and is pissed off that we all don't use her on a regular basis, however she doesn't really care about what she does and my hair is always whack when I go to her!
 
Hey... let me play devil's advocate for a moment. Do you think your hairdresser had a point? Most people that wait for 3 months to perm their hair will suffer great hair loss. Most people (NOT US OF COURSE...
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) don't know how to properly care for their own hair. They don't give it TLC so yes, their hair will break off badly. She may not know that you know what you know. My hair starts to break after 6 weeks. I've gone as long as 8 weeks but would have probably lost lots of hair any longer than that. Some girls here can go for months. It all depends on each individual's hair. I do think she should have asked you why you wanted to stretch your touch up for so long before going straight for the negative.
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If she had asked why then maybe you could have shed a little light on the subject and MABYE she would have given you some words of advice and caution. Who knows.

Now.. on the other hand. My stylist is a HATER too!
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At my last touch up she insisted on cutting an inch "to prevent" future breakage. She said as she picked up the scissors... "I'm not hating or nothing but you should get a good cut at least once a year." I really didn't understand. Then she said if you don't cut it now, it will break and then I don't want to hear about. So then I felt like... if I don't let her cut and then it does break... you know that old "I told you so" line. I let her cut!
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Then she even said... "and you need to make an appointment for 2 weeks to come back for some protein to keep "whatever this growth spurt is" on your head. She left it by asking if I was taking vitamins. I said just a multi which is a LIE!!!!!! I wanted to tell her not to sweat me.
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God... that was long. I guess I just felt like "talking."
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To slow down the breakage I would work on finding products that help soften the new growth. i like to use Pantene's Smooth and Sleek conditioner. You can also try using a wide tooth comb to detangle your hair when it is wet with conditioner in the shower to cut down on breakage when you are extending your relaxer.
 
I totally agree with Supergirl - it's about the cash.
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And to answer your question, Mona Walker, yes! I have experienced something similar - last week, in fact. My (now former) stylist was always trying to talk me into some crazy mess: switching to ammonium thioglycolate (which does NOT mix with hydroxide, i.e., sodium (lye) and calcium (no-lye), relaxers.
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She repeatedly tried to get me to thermally recondition (i.e., the $500 - $2000 Japanese relaxer) my already-relaxed tresses.
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Can you say "an expensive way to go bald"? lol. I know of only one person, a LHCF member, who has had a good experience with thermal reconditioning - all other AA hair has met breakage disaster. She constantly urged me to come in and get "conditioning treatments." Thanks to LHCF,
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I've never had to rely on salons to care for my hair between touchups. I think it pissed her off because last week at my touchup, I suffered such bad chemical burns
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that I had to seek emergency medical treatment and call back the salon for a refund!
Sorry so long! Guess I felt just like venting too, lol.
 
Finding a good hairdresser is like finding a good man; they're so hard to find.

Anyway, I agree with what everyone else has been saying; it's mostly about the money. I have a hairdresser that is pretty honest with me; she's very old and still has a full head of hair to boot. I told what products I used and my regimen and she said it was fine. She didn't try to shove the products she sold in her salon down my throat, but she did recommend some products that I could go out and buy. I like the fact she's for HAIR CARE and not a quick buck.
 
Nyambura,

That is crazy that your stylist burned you that bad. Did she base your scalp? Seriously I would have sued her or at least did this
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Seriously I would have sued her or at least did this
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[/ QUOTE ]
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Yeah, by the time I had to go to Urgent Care I definitely felt like it! No, she didn't base me either. I thought oiling my scalp and new growth with castor oil every day for the week before would help - now I know better.
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Instead, I've fired her and requested a refund from the salon manager.
 
[ QUOTE ]
o.k. maybe she is not a hater but i don't think she knows what she is talking about. i told her that i plan on going 3 months without a relaxer (may-aug) and the first thing out her mouth was ur hair is gonna fall out. i even ask her assistant and she said the same thing. they gave me no reason why it was gonna fall out. the reason i am kinda mad is because she did not even try to encourage me or anything like that or even say try and see how far you get nothing like that. i thought hairdressers was suppose to give you advice and not just say things without no reason.

I had to vent, i was just a little disappointed.
have anyone else experience anything like dis.


[/ QUOTE ]

You may have an exorbitant amount of shedding. Just be careful and very gentle.
 
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Finding a good hairdresser is like finding a good man; they're so hard to find.



[/ QUOTE ]

If not impossible! Ha!
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)
 
Oh my goodness... I so agree with everyone on this thread. Don't listen to her. It's all about the $$$. That's the same thing that I was told. I have coarse, thick hair and my stylist was like "you need to come very six weeks." It had me running scared because I know that relaxing that often would ruin my hair. Til I found this board...

Now, I am three months post relaxer and going strong!
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I barely lose any hair. If any, I lose maybe 5 hairs or less a day. Some days no hair at all.

My routine now that I have a lot of growth is just to wash or rinse then do a braidout. I think that the key is moisture. Keep your hair moist and it won't break (of course, doing the braidouts "fools" the texture so they are good too.)

So relaxing 9 times a year or just 3 times a year... hmmm
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let's do the math...

Besides, it's tougher for her to relax 3 months worth of growth than 6 weeks worth. I would stick to the advice on this board. I am doing just fine with it. Happy growing!

Chichi
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<font color="brown">You know . . . I just don't understand why these MODERN stylists have such a problem with basing the scalp before a relaxer! I mean, there really is not a valid reason for them not to do it. If they know what they are doing, they can certainly apply the base in such a way that the new growth is not affected. Permanant follicular damage just is not a risk that anyone should take in exchange for a rushed relaxer job . . .

Nyambura, I sure hope that you are okay now. Be sure to apply some Vitamin E topically to assist the healing process with minimal scarring.

AngieK (still fed up . . .)</font>
 
Hi guys,
thanks for the response. i only went to her because i thought my hair was thinning out at 8 weeks after last relaxer but my hair came out fine. i will post my july and aug. pics when i go bac to school in aug because my school computer is the only one i can upload my pics from my digital camera. anyway i forgot to tell u guys when i told her i would come to her every 2 weeks for a wash and set then she said it was ok for me to wait 3 months. its real funny that as soon as i say i will to come to her to do my hair it was all of a sudden ok for me to wait 3 months. i will just go to her to get a relaxer because i was doing my own relaxer and i am overprocessing my hair.
 
I'm *much* better now, thanks for asking AngieK.
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I'll have to pick up some vitamin e. I finally tried Mahalialee's Limolasic Acid rinse and her conditioning recipe for severely damaged hair (not that my hair is severely damaged, but I thought it couldn't hurt, you know?) and the elasticity and smoothness has returned to my hair. My scalp is doing better as well. Thank GOD for no permanent hair loss!
 
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