Is this a sin?

kally

New Member
I know we are suppose to serve others when we can, I have always been raised that way. I don't know in the past if I did things for others out of guilt and fear of God not blessing me or what, but now I am in a point in my life where I am just sick and tired of helping and serving others, I just don't want to do it anymore and I feel bad about it, because I know that is not a Godly way to feel and I may not be blessed.

For instance: Last term in one classes I offered free rides home to one of the ladies in my night classes. She has MS and has vision problems. She normally takes the bus home, but she stays like 8-10 min away from me so I thought why not.

This term we are in different classes and she still expects me to drive her. I just don't want to do it. Flat out. I dread going to school now, because I don't want to take her home. I even considered getting rid of my car so I will not have to drive her or anyone else around. Is this a sin to feel this way? I figured why should I have the blessing of a car if I am not going to serve?

I am not good what so ever at telling people no when they ask for a favor.
 

1god1

New Member
I am also not good at saying "no"....just think you could have her condition...thank God you have a car, you have health, you are in school...(I know that sounds lame)...

I don't think it's a sin.
 
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chrstndiva

New Member
I know we are suppose to serve others when we can, I have always been raised that way. I don't know in the past if I did things for others out of guilt and fear of God not blessing me or what, but now I am in a point in my life where I am just sick and tired of helping and serving others, I just don't want to do it anymore and I feel bad about it, because I know that is not a Godly way to feel and I may not be blessed.

For instance: Last term in one classes I offered free rides home to one of the ladies in my night classes. She has MS and has vision problems. She normally takes the bus home, but she stays like 8-10 min away from me so I thought why not.

This term we are in different classes and she still expects me to drive her. I just don't want to do it. Flat out. I dread going to school now, because I don't want to take her home. I even considered getting rid of my car so I will not have to drive her or anyone else around. Is this a sin to feel this way? I figured why should I have the blessing of a car if I am not going to serve?

I am not good what so ever at telling people no when they ask for a favor.

I believe that what you are experiencing might be what I call "Compassion Overload". As Christians, we get so busy serving others, that we don't take time out to rest, get rejuvenated and reconnect with the Master. If you will notice in the the New Testament, even Jesus took some time of solitude away from the crowds to rest and get refilled.

Also, when serving others, we are sharing the love of Christ with others. We are blessed to be a blessing so service should not be done out of guilt or to avoid punishment, but because God has been so good to us that we want to pass it on.

I lead a ministry at my church and am involved in other ministries as well. When I start getting snippy with people, or I feel like I don't want to be bothered, I know that it is time for rest. Sometimes this is just a walk, and sometimes it is a vacation, but in either case, I retreat and talk to God. When I return from my rest, I have the right attitude and am ready to serve. Remember, when we are serving others, we are still being a witness to God's goodness and it doesn't help if we are serving grudgingly with a negative attitude.

I would suggest you take some time of solitude and meditation to pray about this and allow God to speak to you. He didn't design you to work without rest.

I pray that you find peace so that you may continue to serve in His name.

God Bless.
 

kally

New Member
I am also not good at saying "no"....just think you could have her condition...thank God you have a car, you have health, you are in school...(I know that sounds lame)...

I don't think it's a sin.


Yes I am very thankful. The church I grew up really brainwashed me. SOmetimes I feel that, if I don't serve God will punish me with what she has or take away my car. We were raised to believe that God does not like ugly and he will make you pay for it, based on how you treat others.
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
I know we are suppose to serve others when we can, I have always been raised that way. I don't know in the past if I did things for others out of guilt and fear of God not blessing me or what, but now I am in a point in my life where I am just sick and tired of helping and serving others, I just don't want to do it anymore and I feel bad about it, because I know that is not a Godly way to feel and I may not be blessed.

For instance: Last term in one classes I offered free rides home to one of the ladies in my night classes. She has MS and has vision problems. She normally takes the bus home, but she stays like 8-10 min away from me so I thought why not.

This term we are in different classes and she still expects me to drive her. I just don't want to do it. Flat out. I dread going to school now, because I don't want to take her home. I even considered getting rid of my car so I will not have to drive her or anyone else around. Is this a sin to feel this way? I figured why should I have the blessing of a car if I am not going to serve?

I am not good what so ever at telling people no when they ask for a favor.
Kally, there is such a thing as 'burn out'. And this is what I am sensing from you. You are just simply burned out. We can go to an ATM to withdraw money all day long, but we still have to have deposits to continue the withdrawals.

You've been gving away so much of Kally and no one is giving back. You need to be refreshed, replenished, and regrouped and restored.

Kally needs a break! And a well earned and deserved one at that!

So no! Kally is not in sin. Kally is just plain 'tapped out.'

:bighug:
 

kally

New Member
I believe that what you are experiencing might be what I call "Compassion Overload". As Christians, we get so busy serving others, that we don't take time out to rest, get rejuvenated and reconnect with the Master. If you will notice in the the New Testament, even Jesus took some time of solitude away from the crowds to rest and get refilled.

Also, when serving others, we are sharing the love of Christ with others. We are blessed to be a blessing so service should not be done out of guilt or to avoid punishment, but because God has been so good to us that we want to pass it on.

I lead a ministry at my church and am involved in other ministries as well. When I start getting snippy with people, or I feel like I don't want to be bothered, I know that it is time for rest. Sometimes this is just a walk, and sometimes it is a vacation, but in either case, I retreat and talk to God. When I return from my rest, I have the right attitude and am ready to serve. Remember, when we are serving others, we are still being a witness to God's goodness and it doesn't help if we are serving grudgingly with a negative attitude.

I would suggest you take some time of solitude and meditation to pray about this and allow God to speak to you. He didn't design you to work without rest.

I pray that you find peace so that you may continue to serve in His name.

God Bless.


Maybe that's it. I am very burned out. God has blessed me and I feel bad for feeling this way, but I truely can not do it anymore.
 

kally

New Member
Kally, there is such a thing as 'burn out'. And this is what I am sensing from you. You are just simply burned out. We can go to an ATM to withdraw money all day long, but we still have to have deposits to continue the withdrawals.

You've been gving away so much of Kally and no one is giving back. You need to be refreshed, replenished, and regrouped and restored.

Kally needs a break! And a well earned and deserved one at that!

So no! Kally is not in sin. Kally is just plain 'tapped out.'

:bighug:

Very burned out.
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
Yes I am very thankful. The church I grew up really brainwashed me. SOmetimes I feel that, if I don't serve God will punish me with what she has or take away my car. We were raised to believe that God does not like ugly and he will make you pay for it, based on how you treat others.
God will give you a new car before He takes the one you have away form you. Afterall, you've been wearing your present car out being a chaffeuress (new word). :yep: Please, someone needs to put you in a free limo for the rest of your life and they pay for it. Kally, I have to hand it to you......cause I'd have folks walking...........................just like I do. :lachen:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
Very burned out.
And God sees this, angel. He just wanted you to see it too. :yep:

You will not be in sin for making people walk. Walking is healthy! :yep: It will do one of two things. Motivate them to get their own transportation or lose some weight and arrive to Church on time and stop making you late for prayer, praise and worship, while you're trying to park and they're inside. And then you have to eat a late dinner or no dinner because after you take them home, it's late when you finally get to walk in your door.

Send out a memo, that Jesus Walked and so can everybody else. :yep:

ETA: I have to make a note about 'walking' in my posts above. I was referring to others, not the woman who has MS. I have a friend who has been chaffeuress for years and it has taken it's toll upon her.

Kally, you still have no 'obligation' to be 'burned out'. There's a legitimate reason you feel the way you do, and God understands. He finds no fault in you. :love2:
 
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chrstndiva

New Member
Maybe that's it. I am very burned out. God has blessed me and I feel bad for feeling this way, but I truely can not do it anymore.

It's okay to take some time out for yourself and you shouldn't feel guilty about it. Again, Jesus took time out as well, so follow His example.
 

kayte

Well-Known Member
My rule of them for giving or serving is..if I do not feel safe in the serving or givng
..then in good conscience... I MUST NOT DO IT....Putting myself in danger or jeopardy
serves no one
If the prospect of driving someone fills you with dread ..and you are devising ways to avoid
well...that puts you at risk...& this is not safe giving...
it is not Godly service.... it is a mis-service
God want you strong to serve in ways that may not even look like service
you've got to let go of the idea that service involves mandatory sacrifice and
is inherently a materialistic offerings

a kind word

a prayer perhaps for the woman with MS

speaking up about organized religious abuse of trust
as you have

Utilizing the Lord's spiritual gifts to you

Releasing GUILT

all and more are
...service

HTH
:)
shine forth!...courageous one
 
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Renovating

Well-Known Member
I believe that what you are experiencing might be what I call "Compassion Overload". As Christians, we get so busy serving others, that we don't take time out to rest, get rejuvenated and reconnect with the Master. If you will notice in the the New Testament, even Jesus took some time of solitude away from the crowds to rest and get refilled.

Also, when serving others, we are sharing the love of Christ with others. We are blessed to be a blessing so service should not be done out of guilt or to avoid punishment, but because God has been so good to us that we want to pass it on.

I lead a ministry at my church and am involved in other ministries as well. When I start getting snippy with people, or I feel like I don't want to be bothered, I know that it is time for rest. Sometimes this is just a walk, and sometimes it is a vacation, but in either case, I retreat and talk to God. When I return from my rest, I have the right attitude and am ready to serve. Remember, when we are serving others, we are still being a witness to God's goodness and it doesn't help if we are serving grudgingly with a negative attitude.

I would suggest you take some time of solitude and meditation to pray about this and allow God to speak to you. He didn't design you to work without rest.

I pray that you find peace so that you may continue to serve in His name.

God Bless.


I think I might have "Compassion Overload" especially at work. You get soooooooo tired of being taken for granted.
 

Renovating

Well-Known Member
My rule of them for giving or serving is..if I do not feel safe in the serving or givng
..then in good conscience... I MUST NOT DO IT....Putting myself in danger or jeopardy
serves no one
If the prospect of driving someone fills you with dread ..and you are devising ways to avoid
well...that puts you at risk...& this is not safe giving...
it is not Godly service.... it is a mis-service
God want you strong to serve in ways that may not even look like service
you've got to let go of the idea that service involves mandatory sacrifice and
is inherently a materialistic offerings

a kind word

a prayer perhaps for the woman with MS

speaking up about organized religious abuse of trust
as you have

Utilizing the Lord's spiritual gifts to you

Releasing GUILT
all and more are
...service

HTH
:)
shine forth!...courageous one


I needed to hear this. Kayte, you always know the right things to post. Thanks.:grouphug3:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
God will give you a new car before He takes the one you have away form you. Afterall, you've been wearing your present car out being a chaffeuress (new word). :yep: Please, someone needs to put you in a free limo for the rest of your life and they pay for it. Kally, I have to hand it to you......cause I'd have folks walking...........................just like I do. :lachen:

And God sees this, angel. He just wanted you to see it too. :yep:

You will not be in sin for making people walk. Walking is healthy! :yep: It will do one of two things. Motivate them to get their own transportation or lose some weight and arrive to Church on time and stop making you late for prayer, praise and worship, while you're trying to park and they're inside. And then you have to eat a late dinner or no dinner because after you take them home, it's late when you finally get to walk in your door.

Send out a memo, that Jesus Walked and so can everybody else. :yep:

ETA: I have to make a note about 'walking' in my posts above. I was referring to others, not the woman who has MS. I have a friend who has been chaffeuress for years and it has taken it's toll upon her.

Kally, you still have no 'obligation' to be 'burned out'. There's a legitimate reason you feel the way you do, and God understands. He finds no fault in you. :love2:

I needed to hear this. Kayte, you always know the right things to post. Thanks.:grouphug3:
I totally agree... :yep: Kayte, is a true and beautiful woman of God and His gift to each of us. :love2:
 

GV-NA-GI-TLV-GE-I

New Member
I know we are suppose to serve others when we can, I have always been raised that way. I don't know in the past if I did things for others out of guilt and fear of God not blessing me or what, but now I am in a point in my life where I am just sick and tired of helping and serving others, I just don't want to do it anymore and I feel bad about it, because I know that is not a Godly way to feel and I may not be blessed.

For instance: Last term in one classes I offered free rides home to one of the ladies in my night classes. She has MS and has vision problems. She normally takes the bus home, but she stays like 8-10 min away from me so I thought why not.

This term we are in different classes and she still expects me to drive her. I just don't want to do it. Flat out. I dread going to school now, because I don't want to take her home. I even considered getting rid of my car so I will not have to drive her or anyone else around. Is this a sin to feel this way? I figured why should I have the blessing of a car if I am not going to serve?

I am not good what so ever at telling people no when they ask for a favor.

If she compromised by getting rides just a few times per week when you are on campus and paid you for this expensive gasoline, would you still be able to? If not, honestly tell her that it's a stretch for you to be able to do it. This is a bad economy and you are spending more time studying and are not able to help as much...sorry. Sometimes, people need a little wake-up call. I do feel sorry for her but you are not obligated to mess up your own life for her. She's taking advantage of you.
 

firecracker

Well-Known Member
You have done enough serving of that lady. She shouldn't expect anything unless she asked you prior to taking the class or at least asked could you guys get the same class schedule. Your not beholden to her and tell her its an incovience due to her class schedule. Saying NO isn't a sin. You'll continue to help folks thru out your life. You can serve in the church, community and other areas/people too.
 
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