4 Things The Grammys Taught Me About Marriage

[Daughter]

Sorry if this has been shared before

From: http://www.raanetwork.org/4-things-...al&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_campaign=buffer

The right wing conservatives think it’s a decision/ And you can be cured with some treatment and religion/ Man-made rewiring of a predisposition/ Playing God, aw nah here we go/ America the brave still fears what we don’t know/ And God loves all his children, is somehow forgotten/ But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago/ I don’t know.

I didn’t watch the Grammy’s last night.

I always catch onto music trends about six months after the fact, so anytime I try to keep it current, I just reveal my ignorance. However, I did keep up on Twitter last night, and as I laughed along about Pharell’s hat and Lorde’s soulless gaze, I saw news of the marriage ceremony that took place on the Grammy stage. And as I turned it over in my mind, four truths began to sift to the surface.

#1 Marriage is Not a Spectacle

Unless you’re trying to make a brash political move.

Why else would you use music’s biggest night as an excuse to march across the stage, en masse, and say “I do?” It’s disingenuous to claim that what happened last night was about love.

I am not claiming that the heterosexual and homosexual couples involved don’t love each other. But I’m thinking that their love took a backburner to the lights, camera, and action activism that was on display in Queen Latifah’s ceremony.

Marriage is not a spectacle unless you have a point to make.

But the Gospel? The gruesome and glorious death of our Savior on the cross? This is a spectacle that we need to make much of, a dramatic display of God’s redemptive plan throughout history. This is central, not just to marriage, but to life itself.

#2 Marriage is Not About Love

Not entirely.

One of the central tenets of the homosexual movement is that we can’t help who we fall in love with. But, as believers, we’re subjected to a higher standard than the one who gives us butterflies. If marriage is chiefly about love, it’s chiefly about the love we have for God and how our love for all others is interpreted through that lens.

The Macklemore song that blasted during the couples’ ceremony has a lot to say about love and hate, and dissolves into a crooning of 1 Corinthians 13, a popular trademark of many a ceremony. But the love 1 Corinthians 13 calls us to is a much higher call than same-sex or opposite-sex attraction: it’s the love that drove my Savior to the Cross for my sin, which he does not love or overlook, but for which he of so great a love bled and died!

Unless this is the kind of love that is central to our discussion of the homosexual lifestyle, and of marriage, we’re having the wrong conversation.

#3 Marriage is Not About Acceptance

Marriage is about forbearing with one another’s sins.

But we can’t get anywhere with the stuck-in-the-rut mentality of giving in to our predispositions. I am a sinner. My predisposition is to be opposed to the will of God all day every day (Romans 7). There are changes that I need to make in my life day in and day out. And marriage is all about changing. Growing. Learning.

I am inherently unacceptable to God. It is only through the spectacle of Christ’s loving death on the Cross that I can drawn near to the Father. It is only through the spectacle of Christ’s loving death on the Cross that I can draw near to others in a meaningful way.

#4 This Ceremony Was Not About Marriage

This ceremony was not about marriage.

And it’s naive of us to think that the homosexual agenda is simply about marriage.

It’s also naive of us to think that marriage is just about marriage.

It’s not. It’s about Christ and his Bride. And an attack on marriage is an attack on one of the clearest pictures of the Gospel that we have in this life.

The problem with the homosexual lifestyle is not that it makes me uncomfortable. The problem with the homosexual lifestyle is not that I have a personal vendetta against gay people. The problem with the homosexual lifestyle isn’t that it is an affront to my lifestyle.

The problem with what happened last night is rooted far, far deeper: fundamentally, it is a blatant display of a misunderstanding of the message of the Gospel. Heterosexual, homosexual, anywhere on the straight/”queer” spectrum, if we don’t get the Gospel right, then conversations about our personal rights as we find them in that Book written “thirty-five hundred years ago” are meaningless.

What the Grammy’s taught me about marriage is that we do not understand it, because we don’t view human relationships through a Gospel paradigm.

We preach acceptance… through the monumental spectacle of unearned love by blood of Christ and for the glory of God. And the world does not know or understand it. So when we start the conversation that needs to be had about these issues… let’s start there.

 

[JaneBond007]

Now I can transplant an article I got from elsewhere in here and just see what everyone thinks. Good L-rd, help us all. momi I was expecting to see your thread over here and I was going to intently listen. Well, I'm not saying it's the end of the world, but marriage is certainly under barrage. Women have always had to put up with nonsense but now even the good people are settling for crap.


‘Jay Z a poor excuse for a husband’

By Naomi Schaefer Riley

January 28, 2014 | 10:11pm


http://nypost.com/2014/01/28/beyonce-jay-z-this-is-marriage/



What do you call a man who stands there smiling and singing as his scantily clad wife straddles a chair and shakes her rear end for other men’s titillation?

I’m certain if I look through enough Jay Z song titles, I’ll come up with the right name for his role in Beyoncé’s performance at the Grammy Awards Sunday night. Rhymes with Goodyear. . . ? Well, how about I just call him a poor excuse for a husband.

For years, these award ceremonies have pushed the envelope; Beyoncé’s booty-shaking was certainly no worse than Miley Cyrus’s twerking or any number of other performances by Madonna, for instance. But there’s something particularly icky about doing it while your husband looks on approvingly.

“Honestly, I didn’t want to watch Jay Z and Beyoncé’s foreplay,” says Charlotte Hays, author of “When Did White Trash Become the New Normal?”

Indeed, the happy couple seems to have completely blurred the line between what goes on in their bedroom and what happens on national TV. So much for the woman that Michelle Obama has called “a role model who kids everywhere can look up to.”

Hays says, “It wasn’t surprising to see Jay Z, looking pleased at his wife’s hyper-sexualized exhibition on stage.” After all, “he’s made a living singing lyrics that call women ‘*****es’ and ‘hos,’ so we shouldn’t be surprised that he objectified his own wife on stage.”

It is a little bit surprising, though, coming so soon after Beyoncé contributed to the recent feminist manifesto, the Shriver Report. When she complains that “gender equality is a myth,” one wonders to what extent her consent to sell sexuality has contributed to the problem.

The sophisticates will say that what we saw Sunday were just the long-established stage personas of Beyoncé and Jay Z; why should their marriage change that?

Well, for one thing, the happy couple have invited audiences to admire their adorable family, with dad even joking about his daughter’s sippy cups when he accepted an award on Sunday. So they’re suggesting to audiences that this kind of public sexual behavior is compatible with a loving modern marriage.

Which brings us to that odd mass wedding, sort of a Hollywood version of those creepy Moonie affairs, as Queen Latifah officiated at the joining in matrimony of 33 couples as part of the awards ceremony.

Asked about it, she said, “The weight of it comes down, because it wouldn’t matter if you’re same-sex couples or heterosexual couples or interracial couples, it doesn’t matter to me, this is someone’s life committed to one another, and you want to make sure you do it right.” Does that kind of commitment entail watching approvingly as your partner shows off her bootyliciousness?

Feminists will argue that Beyoncé had a career before she got married; why should marriage change how she performs? It’s a good question. How does being married change a relationship? Or, in Beyoncé’s terms, if he likes it, why should he put a ring on it?

It’s a question that François Hollande asked and answered easily: There’s not much reason for men to put a ring on it at all, as far as the French president is concerned.

Hollande just decided to trade in one girlfriend for a younger version. His now-ex was mad enough, according to some reports to destroy $3 million worth of property in the Élysée Palace, but you might reasonably ask what she expected.

A ring is no guarantee (as the first wife of Hollande’s predecessor, Nicolas Sarkozy, learned), but it’s at least a suggestion that there is a permanent future for a relationship.

Still, this may simply be the state of relations between the sexes. Mark Regnerus, a sociologist at the University of Texas at Austin, says that women today have struck a kind of “grand bargain.”

He says, “Women get contraception and the ability to limit and space their children, and the chance to fashion careers — things that sound good and are often experienced as such — and in return men get to decide just how invested in a relationship they actually have to be.”

The problem, he notes, is that “men prefer cheaper sex” — that is, they prefer not to be more invested than they have to be.

Of course, those who do make the investment typically prefer not to share the proceeds with a prime-time TV audience.[/QUOTE]



This is it, in a nutshell, imho. When you have those who feel that this is just the "French" mindset, well, you have the most devalued women, imho. We just go along with those choices that men make because at least we can get just a little piece of a man. Um, that's not G-d's plan. If we look to the Holy Family, we can find a wealth of jewels and joy. Sigh. Don't settle for less, certainly not for the least. It would be better to be alone.

 

[Shimmie]

Jay Z is DEFINITELY an extremely pitiful poor excuse for a man... a Black man, let alone an extremely pitiful poor excuse for a husband.

I'm praying for God to remove all of their financial gain and to remove both him and kanye from out of the limelight and do away with their negative stereotypes. They need to go back to the hood and become humble and responsible to the Black community instead of tearing it down.

Surely they do not represent the men of standard and responsible character that I know and that are in my life...

I believe in humanity and in growing in the love of God.

z and yay are not living right.

 

[JaneBond007]

@Shimmie

G-d knows exactly how to crack us. I heard this on some christian radio show yesterday in my car. We might think we know how G-d should do something, but He knows what to do. Otherwise, He'd destroy us if He didn't use His own special finesse. I wouldn't pray for anyone to lose financial gain. I'd just pray they find Him, however the L-rd chooses. By this, I mean that my intent for sending in the article was to focus on the anti-marriage attitudes. Although I respect your opinion, I don't want someone thinking that I co-sign that. I can't judge Kanye nor Jay-Z and their salvation as it's given by G-d when we pass over. But I'm not naive enough to believe that this world appreciates godly marriage - women. Same old, same old.

Anyone have any opinions on the highlighted red?

 

[Shimmie]

@Shimmie

G-d knows exactly how to crack us. I heard this on some christian radio show yesterday in my car. We might think we know how G-d should do something, but He knows what to do. Otherwise, He'd destroy us if He didn't use His own special finesse. I wouldn't pray for anyone to lose financial gain. I'd just pray they find Him, however the L-rd chooses. By this, I mean that my intent for sending in the article was to focus on the anti-marriage attitudes. Although I respect your opinion, I don't want someone thinking that I co-sign that. I can't judge Kanye nor Jay-Z and their salvation as it's given by G-d when we pass over. But I'm not naive enough to believe that this world appreciates godly marriage - women. Same old, same old.

Anyone have any opinions on the highlighted red?

Why would anyone think you cosigned unless you thanked my post?

The fact remains that these men are banking multi-millions by corrupting others (especially children) with absolutely no conviction and no intent of giving their hearts to the Lord. To them, it's all about the money, at any cost.

I stand by what I shared upwards with God's Word to back it up:

Proverbs 13:18

Poverty and shame [shall be to] him that refuseth instruction: but he that regardeth reproof shall be honoured.

For the benefit of those reading who reject the Bible:

Here's a quote from Thomas Tusser:

A fool and his money shall soon depart...

-----------

Let's see how many followers they'll have without the money.

 

[JaneBond007]

Why would anyone think you cosigned unless you thanked my post?

.

Some people don't think as deeply and I don't wish to be mistaken to take that side. There are times one has to walk alone and make sure it's known. It wasn't my intent to elicit that type of response, although, you are certainly free to exercise your opinion. Frankly, I was more perturbed by the French response than anything else and it spoke many truths about how men see. There are many people who don't promote good but have loads of money. It's not up to me to ask G-d to remove their blessing, no matter how they use it. Besides, remember Mother Teresa in that, there are many "poverties" in the world. This country is a very "poor" one because of the lack of love in it. For all the people who do not know G-d in their hearts, I don't know who they all are. What I do know is that I am commanded to love them and to bless them, not to curse them. I am sorry if this message offends you because I don't want it to.

 

[disgtgyal]

To a certain extent I agree with Shimmie because jay-z among others are using the money and status in a way that hurts the community and the youth. I'm not even speaking from a Christian pov but from black pov. His money bought him influence and he isn't using it in a positive way. How many times do we need to hear jay sing about selling drugs, he wasn't the rule he was an exception. How many black men in jail right now who are talented lyricist who sold drugs in effort to finance their dream of being a rapper, I would say many. Whether he wants to acknowledge it he is a leader and she has a responsibility to those who look up to him, to whom much is given much is required. He has a daughter now and my question to him is would he want her to bring home a man like, one who glorifies the things he did, I'm guessing no, but he's feeding his crap to these lost boys and young men whom he doesn't care about and they're so blind they don't see it.
I think shimmie is saying strip him of his money and you will diminish his influence and maybe his fall will cause him to seek God.

 

[momi]

Jay Z is DEFINITELY an extremely pitiful poor excuse for a man... a Black man, let alone an extremely pitiful poor excuse for a husband. I'm praying for God to remove all of their financial gain and to remove both him and kanye from out of the limelight and do away with their negative stereotypes. They need to go back to the hood and become humble and responsible to the Black community instead of tearing it down. Surely they do not represent the men of standard and responsible character that I know and that are in my life... I believe in humanity and in growing in the love of God. z and yay are not living right.

Absolutely - a pitiful excuse for a husband indeed.

I don't care either way about the finances only because someone else just take their place. I'm not going to lie and say that I pray for them anymore either. However I do pray for those that are under their influence... That they will come into the knowledge of the truth.

 

[Shimmie]

Absolutely - a pitiful excuse for a husband indeed.

I don't care either way about the finances only because someone else just take their place.

I'm not going to lie and say that I pray for them anymore either. However I do pray for those that are under their influence... That they will come into the knowledge of the truth.

At the bolded: Proverbs 13:22

"...The wealth of the 'sinner' is laid up for the 'Just'.

 

[Farida]

In the ET forum I mentioned that Jay and Bey have some kind of arrangement it seems as entertainers.

But I don't agree with it and I just don't understand how parents of a little girl don't have any problem with the hypersexualization, commodification and exploitation of women for entertainment. Or the degradation "*****." But I have stopped trying to understand and accepted that the two of them are all about commercial success by an means necessary.

I am at least happy that they are the few in Hollywood who actually got married and had a child. Everyone else is just having babies and relationships if any, all willy-nilly. I hope at the very least, their fans can emulate that aspect.

 

[Laela]

Yes, and that's the disturbing part...

But I don't agree with it and I just don't understand how parents of a little girl don't have any problem with the hypersexualization, commodification and exploitation of women for entertainment. Or the degradation "*****." But I have stopped trying to understand and accepted that the two of them are all about commercial success by an means necessary.

 

[Nice Lady]

In the ET forum I mentioned that Jay and Bey have some kind of arrangement it seems as entertainers.

But I don't agree with it and I just don't understand how parents of a little girl don't have any problem with the hypersexualization, commodification and exploitation of women for entertainment. Or the degradation "*****." But I have stopped trying to understand and accepted that the two of them are all about commercial success by an means necessary.

I am at least happy that they are the few in Hollywood who actually got married and had a child. Everyone else is just having babies and relationships if any, all willy-nilly. I hope at the very least, their fans can emulate that aspect.

The bolded is so true. It's sad that people don't even consider nowadays marriage. So, at least, this is one example that the kids have. It's better to have a husband and not just any husband--one who has ambition, wants to be a productive citizen, character and other good qualities. I have a question. Did you mean "any means necessary" or "a means necessary" in your first paragraph? I was unsure.

 

[IronButterfly]

Wasn't anybody else disturbed by the glamorization of domestic abuse as the audience gave a standing ovation to Jay Z immortalizing Ike Turner while chanting "Eat the cake Anna Mae!", which was then followed by a loving embrace between Bey and J?

 

[momi]

Wasn't anybody else disturbed by the glamorization of domestic abuse as the audience gave a standing ovation to Jay Z immortalizing Ike Turner while chanting "Eat the cake Anna Mae!", which was then followed by a loving embrace between Bey and J?

I didn't watch the entire performance - only the clips. Just when you think it couldn't get any worse.

 

[mrselle]

Wasn't anybody else disturbed by the glamorization of domestic abuse as the audience gave a standing ovation to Jay Z immortalizing Ike Turner while chanting "Eat the cake Anna Mae!", which was then followed by a loving embrace between Bey and J?

The entire performance was disturbing. Clearly, there were no limits where this performance was concerned. If I remember correctly, Beyonce performed on the Grammys with Tina Turner years ago. She said that Tina Turner was someone she admired, so I am a little shocked that she would allow those lyrics in her song. But as I said, there were no limits with this performance, so I wasn't shocked. Disturbed? Yes. Disappointed? Yes. But, I can't say I was shocked.

 

[Shimmie]

Wasn't anybody else disturbed by the glamorization of domestic abuse as the audience gave a standing ovation to Jay Z immortalizing Ike Turner while chanting "Eat the cake Anna Mae!", which was then followed by a loving embrace between Bey and J?

I didn't watch the entire performance - only the clips. Just when you think it couldn't get any worse.

The entire performance was disturbing. Clearly, there were no limits where this performance was concerned. If I remember correctly, Beyonce performed on the Grammys with Tina Turner years ago. She said that Tina Turner was someone she admired, so I am a little shocked that she would allow those lyrics in her song. But as I said, there were no limits with this performance, so I wasn't shocked. Disturbed? Yes. Disappointed? Yes. But, I can't say I was shocked.

I haven't watched the 'grammys' in years...literally. I think it was back in 1998 when Jennifer Lopez wore the 'shredded' green dress' and it was the talk of the world. Since then, I haven't watched.

I stopped watching the Oscars when they gave 'props' to 'broke back mountain - gay movie . I don't like pageant shows, especially since Parez Hilton (the gay pageant judge) decided to trap and blast Miss California for taking a stand for God's Marriage plan. The BET awards are a HUGE disappointment and I wanted so much to support them, but they continue to give awards for such compromising displays of entertainment.

I'm tired of the mess and I will continue to stand on my word for God to strip them of all of their power and money. The influence is a disruption to the sanctity of humanity, let alone the innocent souls of young Black children who look up the them and for all of the wrong reasons.

 

[Shimmie]

To a certain extent I agree with Shimmie because jay-z among others are using the money and status in a way that hurts the community and the youth.

I'm not even speaking from a Christian pov but from black pov. His money bought him influence and he isn't using it in a positive way. How many times do we need to hear jay sing about selling drugs, he wasn't the rule he was an exception. How many black men in jail right now who are talented lyricist who sold drugs in effort to finance their dream of being a rapper, I would say many.

Whether he wants to acknowledge it he is a leader and she has a responsibility to those who look up to him, to whom much is given much is required. He has a daughter now and my question to him is would he want her to bring home a man like, one who glorifies the things he did, I'm guessing no, but he's feeding his crap to these lost boys and young men whom he doesn't care about and they're so blind they don't see it.

I think shimmie is saying strip him of his money and you will diminish his influence and maybe his fall will cause him to seek God.

disgtgyal, I cannot thank you enough for your entire post. You have shared exactly what is in my heart.

Thank you. And I mean it..... "Thank you". :giveheart2:

 

[Shimmie]

In the ET forum I mentioned that Jay and Bey have some kind of arrangement it seems as entertainers.

But I don't agree with it and I just don't understand how parents of a little girl don't have any problem with the hypersexualization, commodification and exploitation of women for entertainment. Or the degradation "*****." But I have stopped trying to understand and accepted that the two of them are all about commercial success by an means necessary.

I am at least happy that they are the few in Hollywood who actually got married and had a child. Everyone else is just having babies and relationships if any, all willy-nilly. I hope at the very least, their fans can emulate that aspect.

Farida...

Hey Babygirl... I hear what you are sharing

However, jz and beyonce' are giving a distorted view of marriage. They're not a good look nor a good example of what marriage is.

Think about the weak 'married' men and women who will follow in the same twisted path that they are displaying all due to their popularity.

Is this what marriage is all about? Is this what God planned for marriage. Their marriage is not even a marriage. It's a distorted mockery and an insult.

This post is not 'against' you... I promise you that. It's against the idolatry of these horrid enter-'taint'-ers.

 

[felic1]

Born again believers are able to live holy. They are able to participate in holy matrimony. You need God's ability to be able to privately and publicly respect your spouse. Maybe they think their behavior is funny. It's almost like Jay is pimping Beyoncé "ducks the missles". I have no hatred to anyone. I do not think he gives his wife the appropriate respect. If the lady belongs to you, are there not some things that only you can enjoy? Many are trying to make Americans accept the policies? of the homosexual agenda. I do not want to follow these ideas. A group wedding of gay people? That is supposed to make more people accept or embrace the gay lifestyle. I believe that much of this is for recruitment.

 

[JaneBond007]

Does anyone know if these were religious before they hit fame and marriage?

 

[mrselle]

Does anyone know if these were religious before they hit fame and marriage?

I was under the impression that Beyonce was a Christian when she first started out. She has recorded a few gospel songs with Destiny's Child and I remember the story of how their name, "Destiny's Child" came to be. They were trying to come up with a name for their group and Beyonce's mom was looking through her Bible and the word "destiny" popped out....something to that effect. I also remember an interview she did several years ago about whenever she goes to church she can't stop crying because God has been so good to her. Many years ago there was a thread in this forum about her commenting about not going to church anymore because it was hard for her to worship with everyone staring at her. Clearly, the more famous she became the less of a priority God was in her life. I could be wrong, but the impression that I get is that she is very far from God.

 

[Farida]

Does anyone know if these were religious before they hit fame and marriage?

I don't know about Jay-z but it sounds like Beyonce was. There are people who know the church she attended in Houston. Also, if you watch her documentary she talks about being the product of her grandmother and her mother's prayers. It is a very touching moment as she reflects on how these women prayed for her.

However she stopped going to church because she of the issues that come with fame - you can't worship and everyone is so distracted by your presence.

She and Jay-Z seem to be really into numerology now which is very disturbing to me. Some people find it interesting but I honestly think they have faith in it and it's like a religion of sorts to them.

 

[Farida]

I was under the impression that Beyonce was a Christian when she first started out. She has recorded a few gospel songs with Destiny's Child and I remember the story of how their name, "Destiny's Child" came to be. They were trying to come up with a name for their group and Beyonce's mom was looking through her Bible and the word "destiny" popped out....something to that effect. I also remember an interview she did several years ago about whenever she goes to church she can't stop crying because God has been so good to her. Many years ago there was a thread in this forum about her commenting about not going to church anymore because it was hard for her to worship with everyone staring at her. Clearly, the more famous she became the less of a priority God was in her life. I could be wrong, but the impression that I get is that she is very far from God.

I remember the name for the album "The Writings on the Wall" was inspired by the story of Nebuchadnezzar from Daniel 5.

 

[sweetvi]

There is a snippet of a documentary she has that shows her crying and asking why God has given her this gift. I took it as some form of spiritual battle, maybe she wants to do more or different in her life, but remember she has been groomed by both her parents. Pageants by mother and singing by father. Now she has been placed in Jay-z hands to continue the journey.. Although he loves her, he is a man that has always exploited women and she is no different even though she is his wife.

I feel like God has a sense of humor and blessed them with a girl... My mother used to say God gives you a girl as payback for how bad you used to be....

 

[Laela]

To revisit this...


Why 33 couples? It's believed the ceremony was a mockery of God in that Jesus is believed to have been 33 years old at death.

#4 This Ceremony Was Not About Marriage

This ceremony was not about marriage.

And it’s naive of us to think that the homosexual agenda is simply about marriage.

It’s also naive of us to think that marriage is just about marriage.

It’s not. It’s about Christ and his Bride. And an attack on marriage is an attack on one of the clearest pictures of the Gospel that we have in this life.

 

[blazingthru]

To revisit this...


Why 33 couples? It's believed the ceremony was a mockery of God in that Jesus is believed to have been 33 years old at death.

Wow really, I do not watch any award shows none at all. My daughter watches it I get a glimpse here and there, when Katy came on that was a wrap changed the channel. So I didn't know all what went on but I know some Stars walked out.

 

[Farida]

The bolded is so true. It's sad that people don't even consider nowadays marriage. So, at least, this is one example that the kids have. It's better to have a husband and not just any husband--one who has ambition, wants to be a productive citizen, character and other good qualities. I have a question. Did you mean "any means necessary" or "a means necessary" in your first paragraph? I was unsure.

Sorry I meant any means necessary. I type.on my phone a lot nowadays so I make many mistakes.