Naturals that went back to relaxing, any regrets?

felicia

New Member
Why or why not? I'm thinking of going back b/c the knots & split ends are kicking my butt. I didn't have any major problems when I relaxed, but I'm super scared of going back. Any advice?

Thanks
 

JessCNU

New Member
I'm a newbie but I can share my experience with this. I was natural for about a year but I didn't really know how to take care of my hair in its natural state. I got frustrated with trying to wear it straight and slapped a perm in. looking back i do regret it and think how long my hair would have been if I could have just held on :( but I am try to see if I can grow my hair out with a relaxer. I didn't know all of the things I was doing wrong so I just thought my hair was destined to be short and never grow past my neck. I know now what I have to do and I really to feel like I can have long, healthy, RELAXED, hair now that I'm on the right track. I have seen so many great people on this board do it so I know it's possible. Hope my two cents helped!
 

FemmeCreole

Island Gyal
I sometimes miss my natural hair, especially when I see someone with a big *** fro. But I do not have regrets. I'm enjoying my hair whether relaxed or natural.
 

DarkAngell

Well-Known Member
i was relaxed bone straight for years, then transitioned to natural for a year,then bc'd in march and stayed natural for only 6 months. Early this month i texlaxed and i'm FINALLY 100% happy. I have curls but not as much tangles,i have volume but not to much volume for my comfort, more products are working on my hair, it dries faster, and is easier to straighten, have more styling options then when i was bone straight & much more body.
 

Crackers Phinn

Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
ok here is the honest to G-d truth.

I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place.

I went natural because I thought it would be easier to retain length. When I think about how much hair I have cut off in the past 3+ years due to knots (don't even mention my BC) I'm like I just wasted my time and length.

I've only been re-relaxed for a few weeks and trust me when I say that I don't miss a damn thing about being natural. I thought I was going to feel some kind of guilt or regret when I sat in the stylist chair, but that sooooo didn't happen. The first time I washed my hair and was able to detangle in less than a minute, I felt like somebody had just let me out of jail.

I think the reason I felt this way was that I never put too much emphasis on natural hair being part of my identity. I wore a bun with natural hair and I wear a bun with relaxed hair. The bun is representative of my style and personality, the crinklyness or straightness of the bun is just a means to the end.

So my long winded answer is - no regrets.
 

MizzP

Well-Known Member
No. I still love natural styles, but it just wasn't for me. When I was natural, I had to deal with so many tangles and knots. Doing my hair was an all day affair. After 18 months I relaxed and my hair was thin. It took a year to grow out the majority of the knots. My hair is finally starting to thicken up some two years later and I am inching on bra strap length. My only regret was running across lhcf after I came across nappturality; I was past shoulder length when I BC'd.
 

momi

Well-Known Member
I did not relax - but I did think about it - really hard.

When I first BC'd I had no idea how to care for my hair. I had not learned that the "what works for one may not work for another" lesson, so I had to struggle with jacked up and dry hair for a few months until I figured out what worked for me.

I am so glad that I did not relax now - thank God I finally figured out what worked for me - had I not I am not sure if I would still be natural.
 

hopeful

Well-Known Member
ok here is the honest to G-d truth.

I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place....

So my long winded answer is - no regrets.

:lol: @ the bolded. I love your honesty:yep:.

The first time I went natural was in 2005. I bc'd and ended up relaxing 5 or 6 months later. That time I really regretted relaxing. I felt I relaxed for the wrong reasons and hadn't given my natural hair enough of a chance.

A year later in 2006 I bc'd again because my hair was a straight up mess, shedding and breaking all over. 2 years and 4 months later, this past July, I texturized my hair. It's only been two months but so far I have no regrets and I don't think I will. I really know my hair this time and I did a lot more research on relaxing this time and really had a process to follow vs. just doing it.

This time I just feel very happy about everything. My hair still has lots of texture in it, but straightens and stays straight much better. I can get my freshly washed hair in a ponytail easily, something I could never do with my natural hair. My braid-outs/twist outs last longer too.
 
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love2praz

New Member
I'm a newbie but I can share my experience with this. I was natural for about a year but I didn't really know how to take care of my hair in its natural state. I got frustrated with trying to wear it straight and slapped a perm in. looking back i do regret it and think how long my hair would have been if I could have just held on :( but I am try to see if I can grow my hair out with a relaxer. I didn't know all of the things I was doing wrong so I just thought my hair was destined to be short and never grow past my neck. I know now what I have to do and I really to feel like I can have long, healthy, RELAXED, hair now that I'm on the right track. I have seen so many great people on this board do it so I know it's possible. Hope my two cents helped!

This was me....I've made the transition from natural to relaxed 3 or 4 times....I'm natural again now. For me, I could never retain hair with a relaxer no matter how hard I tried. I even wore a bun religiously for a year and still had messed up ends. Plus, my hair always ended up super thin (I have real fine strands). So, for me, relaxers and I just don't mix if I want healthy hair.

Everytime I relaxed, it was out of frustration and I had regret almost immediately. Now, to BC is nothing to me. I just do it! It is hair and it will grow regardless if handled with TLC!!! :yep:
 

morehairplease

Well-Known Member
I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place.

I went natural because I thought it would be easier to retain length. When I think about how much hair I have cut off in the past 3+ years due to knots (don't even mention my BC) I'm like I just wasted my time and length.


JCoily I just wanted to say that I love your honesty. I have been natural 3 times now and all of my big chops were forced: 1)went to a stylist reccommend by a LHCF member for a trim, if memory serves me correct, and came out w/a bc. 2) forced to do the bc after a salon texturizer gone wrong and finally 3) my current bc was due to MAJOR damage from hard presses. I am dealing with breakage now and once I get that under control I plan to relax my hair. A lady that stays a couple of doors down from me stated that she could braid my hair once it gets a little more length to it. Hopefully, this will be in December. When I think back to all the times I was forced to bc I get mad as heck b/c I lost alot of length, time, and money.
 
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blkbeauty

Well-Known Member
I was natural in my teen yrs and then started to relax again when I was 21. Intially my hair was beautiful, but as time went on my hair became severly damaged and I went natural again when I was 27. If you decide just make sure you are taking extra precaution with you hair since chemicals weakens the hair.

Btw, I know what you mean about the knots. As a natural, I get knots all the time...I thought I was the only one. The only way that I escape this is wearing my hair in two stranded twist and applying Shea Butter.
 
P

Paradox

Guest
ok here is the honest to G-d truth.

I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place.

I went natural because I thought it would be easier to retain length. When I think about how much hair I have cut off in the past 3+ years due to knots (don't even mention my BC) I'm like I just wasted my time and length.

I've only been re-relaxed for a few weeks and trust me when I say that I don't miss a damn thing about being natural. I thought I was going to feel some kind of guilt or regret when I sat in the stylist chair, but that sooooo didn't happen. The first time I washed my hair and was able to detangle in less than a minute, I felt like somebody had just let me out of jail.

I think the reason I felt this way was that I never put too much emphasis on natural hair being part of my identity. I wore a bun with natural hair and I wear a bun with relaxed hair. The bun is representative of my style and personality, the crinklyness or straightness of the bun is just a means to the end.

So my long winded answer is - no regrets.
I probably will feel just as relieved as you do, if I go on an relax.
I don't get tangles or anything and isn't like I am addicted to relaxers because I've only had 4 in my life time. But I honestly don't think I can take doing my hair for an hour everyday. If don't do it, it's dry..horribly dry.
It always looks frizzy at the top, like I just walked out the house and didn't care. I think the begining of my junior year/august 2009 i might texlax it.
 
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locabouthair

Well-Known Member
I dont regret it. I only relaxed my hair because I was going away for grad school and I knew I wouldnt have the time to spend hours on my hair like I did before. When I first got to the board I was natural then after a year I relaxed. I got the knots on the ends that everyone talks about but it never bothered me much. I just relaxed because I was spending too much time on my hair. I dont think I will go natural again though.
 

Ms Lala

Well-Known Member
I was natural in HS and relaxed when I turned 17 before going to college. I wore it relaxed for most of my college years and started to regret it. I started thinking about how much longer and healthier my hair and scalp would have been w/o the relaxer. My relaxed hair didn't look bad but it stayed about the same length and I had some seriou issues w/my scalp. But w/the information on this board maybe I wouldn't have had all those problems.
 

gradygirl

New Member
I went natural because I thought that my hair would be healthier and grow longer without the use of chemicals. I also missed the thickness that my hair once had. Afterall I was texlaxed really by mistake and my results were not consistant. Well, after I BC'ed and I got to know my natural hair at first I loved it but it got to be such a hassle for me. My hair was too thick and the amount of time that I spent on it on wash days was horrible. I was exhausted and I felt like a slave to my hair. I had to plan my schedule around my hair because my wash days was an all day affair. Once it hit shoulder length I started getting terrible knots and tangles and I realized that I would probably be stuck at that length because of the need for frequent trims. I had to struggle just to get my hair into a ponytail and on most days I could not wear my hair out because I looked a mess. Also, my natural hair would not recieve hardly any product known to mankind. It was just not worth the hassle and was taking up too much of my life. I wanted the look of natural hair without all of the hassle so I texturized instead and now I am happy and relieved so no I do not regret it in the least.
 

redd

New Member
ok here is the honest to G-d truth.

I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place.

I went natural because I thought it would be easier to retain length. When I think about how much hair I have cut off in the past 3+ years due to knots (don't even mention my BC) I'm like I just wasted my time and length.

I've only been re-relaxed for a few weeks and trust me when I say that I don't miss a damn thing about being natural. I thought I was going to feel some kind of guilt or regret when I sat in the stylist chair, but that sooooo didn't happen. The first time I washed my hair and was able to detangle in less than a minute, I felt like somebody had just let me out of jail.

I think the reason I felt this way was that I never put too much emphasis on natural hair being part of my identity. I wore a bun with natural hair and I wear a bun with relaxed hair. The bun is representative of my style and personality, the crinklyness or straightness of the bun is just a means to the end.

So my long winded answer is - no regrets.

I was thinking about ending my transition and relaxing just so i can detangle easier. After much consideration I dont think I will have any regrets either.
 

balisi

New Member
No regrets whatsoever. I loved my natural hair for the 3.5 years I rocked it, and now I'm loving my relaxed hair once again.
 

naijamerican

Well-Known Member
I have to say, I really appreciate ya'lls honesty. :yep: For the past two years I've been stuck on what to do with my hair. I think that I'm going to stay natural but if I start to feel like I'm a slave to my hair, I won't hesitate to get it relaxed.
 

NewYorkgyrl

Well-Known Member
ok here is the honest to G-d truth.

I'm lightweight mad that I went natural in the first place.

I went natural because I thought it would be easier to retain length. When I think about how much hair I have cut off in the past 3+ years due to knots (don't even mention my BC) I'm like I just wasted my time and length.

I've only been re-relaxed for a few weeks and trust me when I say that I don't miss a damn thing about being natural. I thought I was going to feel some kind of guilt or regret when I sat in the stylist chair, but that sooooo didn't happen. The first time I washed my hair and was able to detangle in less than a minute, I felt like somebody had just let me out of jail.

I think the reason I felt this way was that I never put too much emphasis on natural hair being part of my identity. I wore a bun with natural hair and I wear a bun with relaxed hair. The bun is representative of my style and personality, the crinklyness or straightness of the bun is just a means to the end.

So my long winded answer is - no regrets.


:funny: :lachen::lachen::lachen:
 

Bubblingbrownshuga

Well-Known Member
Great thread Felicia.

I wonder how it feels to be able to run your pinky horizontally to part the hair as a relaxed head and not get snags . I daydream about this often.
 

kblc06

Well-Known Member
I know this is semi-controversial, but to decrease knots and splits over the past 2 months, I've been slicking my hair back into (as smooth as possible) with Fantasia IC protein gel. I rinse any gel residue off the ends, moisturize, braid, and secure the ends with a rubber band. I just rollerset my hair to straighten it and see where my ends needed to be trimmed. I had maybe 5-10 hairs that were BEGINNING to split-and no knots:yep:. So I was able to retain about 2 inches of length. It's either that or rollerset/and or flat iron :look:


I used this style to transition and retain length and it's working for me now. I can not leave my ends out unless I do so in a controlled manner (i.e. braid or twist out)
 

jshor09

Well-Known Member
I did regret going back to relaxers. it is a choice you must mke for yourself. i am now natural again. you just have to be happy in the decision u make.
 

Je Ne Sais Quoi

Well-Known Member
So far no regrets but i've only been texlaxed for less than a week :) Whose to say though that in a few years i may transition again to natchal. We have so many options with our type of hair!
 

disgtgyal

Well-Known Member
At first i regretted it because i lost so much hair went from SL to neck and my hair was rough, dry and tangled, but now for the most part my hair is back to normal minus the missing inches lol but if i had to do it again i wouldn't i would continue doing my weekly presses eventhough it took forever
 

discobiscuits

New Member
I was relaxed, transitioned to natural, texturized, relaxed then bc'd. I'm natural now and I won't go back. Going back to chemicals from natural was a bad move for me.
 

Napp

Ms. Nobody
I did and hated it. chems are not for me:nono: i retained more length while natural and had more knots when i texturized. my ish is so dry at times! and i like how when i was natural i could use my beloved gel all day everyday and didnt experience as much breakage as i did when texturized. plus my coils loooked off after texturizing which irked me the most. i dont like straight hair either so that was also a big factor as well
 
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