Oral Sex in the Christian Marriage?!?!?!

Iwanthealthyhair67

Well-Known Member
is this a trick question...lol

No matter how many choices I have I always want chocolate if there's no chocolate I spend too much time thinking much to the servers chagrin and end up picking a flavour I don't really like or want...



NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
Question for thought:

You go in to a Baskin Robbins ice cream shop with 32 flavors available. You're told that you can't have Strawberry or Rocky Road.

Do you conclude that you can only order vanilla?

They still have a Baskin Robbins around?
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
is this a trick question...lol

No matter how many choices I have I always want chocolate if there's no chocolate I spend too much time thinking much to the servers chagrin and end up picking a flavour I don't really like or want...



NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!

:rofl: at 'NEXT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ' :rofl:
 

DaiseeDay

New Member
nicola.kirwan said:
Question for thought:

You go in to a Baskin Robbins ice cream shop with 32 flavors available. You're told that you can't have Strawberry or Rocky Road.

Do you conclude that you can only order vanilla?

I shouldn't be in this thread :look: buuut

Now let's say you go to Baskin Robbins craving some Rocky Road, they don't have it; but you're craving some ice cream, so you settle for another flavor. May not be vanilla, but nothing would've bought you as much pleasure as the Rocky Road, so you're satisfied, but not as much as you could be. And probably still wanting some rocky road.
 

loolalooh

Well-Known Member
Ladies, I've tried but I cannot see how oral sex within a marriage is wrong. I read the Latter Day blog post, and my biggest issue with the research is his definition of the word sodomy. It should be noted that the definition of the word sodomy has changed over time. Additionally, it is clear in the Bible that God frowns upon "sex" between those of the same gender. The word sodomy is based on this, but again, has been changed over time. Is it not possible that the original definition was "oral/anal sex amongst homosexuals" which was later changed in our society to cover acts between "heterosexuals" for the purposes of not discriminating against homosexuals?

Additionally, the writer of the post says: "Holding true to the definition of the word sodomy, these temple prostitutes would perform homosexual acts on anyone, regardless of gender." Can someone direct me to that particular scripture so that I am not relying merely on his interpretation of it?

________________________

Now for oral sex being okay in a marriage, I look to this 1 Corinthians 7:2-3:

2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs.


I interpret it as sex for pleasure being okay in a marriage. Oral sex is a form of sex for pleasure. I also interpret it as meaning sex with a marriage is not immoral. Oral sex can fall under this.

________________________

Anyway, I'm certainly open to being convicted and learning. It just needs to come stronger than argument based on a definition of sodomy that may have been tailored so as not to target homosexuals.
 

Iwanthealthyhair67

Well-Known Member
'needs' define needs because often times what a person feels he/she needs is a want or a desire I don't think one needs to have oral sex to be satisfied ...

I'm not against oral sex or least I wasn't against it while I was having it in my unsaved life but now I'm just curious based on the remarks on the board...

imyo Oral sex may have been brought about for mans quest for more simply because we are not easily satisfied we always want to push to envelope so to speak..oral, then role playing, then rape sex, then fetishes, then public places and threesomes etc., etc., so what will satisfy man (us) ...

If two virgins (the way God designed) got married I doubt that they would be into all the theatrics and back flips and kama sutra what ever else and they will be satisfied...

Example:
Back in the day I had a girlfriend she dated this guy (high school sweethearts) who was also a virgin they were each others firsts they a few years later they broke up she met someone else with considerably more sexual experience than she, she raved about is sexual prowse(sp)...however, she was content and happy with the high school sweetheart because that was all she new...
 
Last edited:

Laela

Sidestepping the "lynch mob"
I don't believe anyone is disputing sex for pleasure in a marriage is OK. Play time, lingerie, etc. Though the wife must please her husband and vice-versa, we cannot overlook that both their bodies are Temples of the Holy Spirit and such, belong to God...

1 Corin 6:19:
Do you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God, don't you? You do not belong to yourselves


I interpret this to mean, what God has to say matters. If there is conviction, it will come from the Holy Spirit because God does not condone or participate in any perversion. Any perversion is a distortion of God's design and purpose. So, it's possible for a married couple to defile the marriage bed if they engage in perverted acts. To not believe that is to believe that marriage makes a Christian woman more saved than a single one.


My pastor once talked on marriage and mentioned oral sex and was straight up about it: "God made my mouth for two things..to speak and to eat food." Of course, if he didn't say "food" I'm sure some folks would've ran with that... lol

________________________

Now for oral sex being okay in a marriage, I look to this 1 Corinthians 7:2-3:

2 But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs.

I interpret it as sex for pleasure being okay in a marriage. Oral sex is a form of sex for pleasure. I also interpret it as meaning sex with a marriage is not immoral. Oral sex can fall under this.

________________________

Anyway, I'm certainly open to being convicted and learning. It just needs to come stronger than argument based on a definition of sodomy that may have been tailored so as not to target homosexuals.
 

loolalooh

Well-Known Member
I don't believe anyone is disputing sex for pleasure in a marriage is OK. Play time, lingerie, etc. Though the wife must please her husband and vice-versa, we cannot overlook that both their bodies are Temples of the Holy Spirit and such, belong to God...

1 Corin 6:19:
Do you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God, don't you? You do not belong to yourselves


I interpret this to mean, what God has to say matters. If there is conviction, it will come from the Holy Spirit because God does not condone or participate in any perversion. Any perversion is a distortion of God's design and purpose. So, it's possible for a married couple to defile the marriage bed if they engage in perverted acts. To not believe that is to believe that marriage makes a Christian woman more saved than a single one.


My pastor once talked on marriage and mentioned oral sex and was straight up about it: "God made my mouth for two things..to speak and to eat food." Of course, if he didn't say "food" I'm sure some folks would've ran with that... lol

Thanks, Laela. Maybe oral sex is something that I will be convicted against (assuming it truly is a sin) once I get married. Right now, I'm just thinking hypothetically, as I am still single.

When I think about my future husband, I want to show my love to his entire body. My mouth is made for "speaking and eating food", but I presume it okay to kiss his lips with my mouth. Then to kiss his shoulder. Then to kiss his chest and arms. I'll stop here before I get too graphic, but hopefully, you get where I'm going.

I agree, it's possible for a married couple to defile the bed, but I feel like those methods of defiling were pointed out in Hebrews 13:4 (adultery and immorality). I guess where I am not meeting others is whether oral sex counts as an "immorality".

I think, for now, I'll just wait until marriage and pray about it when the time comes. I may be getting too ahead of myself right now.
 

Nice & Wavy

Well-Known Member
In the beginning.....

#1 - God made man in His image and after His likeness.

#2 - God made man and woman to be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth.


#3 - And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bore Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.



In the beginning....powerful words.

If we are made in God's image and after His likeness, we must ask ourselves these questions:

"Would God approve of what I am doing in the marriage bed with my husband, knowing that its the same thing that homosexuals and lesbians do in an defiled bed?"

"Should I engage in the same acts knowing that God considers it an abomination?"


"Is my temple a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God...which is my reasonable service?"


I believe that the Holy Spirit gives us unctions in our spirit that lets us know what the Lord is pleased with and what He isn't pleased with. I think we become so accustomed to what we think is right, rather than knowing what is right, that we don't hear when He is speaking truth to us. So....we search the scriptures, which is what we are suppose to do. But, when we can't find it in the scriptures, then we think to ourselves "well, if its not in the Word then it must be ok."

Jesus said this:"But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you." John 14:26 NASB
Many things that the Holy Spirit reveals to us may not actually be written in the scriptures because, if all the things that Jesus taught/said was written...the books would be too many to number.
And there are also many other things which Jesus did, which if they were written in detail, I suppose that even the world itself would not contain the books that would be written. John 21:25 NASB
Now, most of us were not virgins when we got with our husbands. What we did in other relationships in the bedroom, we brought into our Godly marriages. [No matter how you feel about Juanita Bynum, ya'll got to remember "No More Sheets." God used that woman to share about the defiled bed like no other] Just because we are married, doesn't mean we can do whatever we want in the bedroom. Oral sex came from other people and places. Think about it...do you think that in the beginning....when there was no sin... that there was oral sex going on between Adam and Eve? Before the fall....there was no need for that. What God gave to them was more than enough. After the fall...sin came in and we are dealing with sin in our lives today.

We must not take the scripture out of context. (Marriage bed undefiled)

The bible says that "Adam KNEW his wife...." we don't need for anyone to tell us what that means....He knew his wife so that they could have children and build upon the foundation that the Lord has set for us as humans. The Lord made it beautiful for Adam and Eve to make love...God, Our Father, is the ultimate love generator....no one can do it like He can!!! We must remember that He is and always will be perfect and there is no sin in Him! God doesn't make mistakes!!!! (note: I'm too old to have more children now...but, my husband KNOWS me:eyebrows2 :Blush2: :kiss2: :cupid: :giggle:

We must be in position to hear from the Holy Spirit. He has let me and my husband know that its wrong (oral sex)from the very beginning of our relationship and I'm grateful that we listened to Him because I can truly say that our marriage is 14 years strong and still going and our bed is definitely undefiled because we CHOOSE not to allow anything that may even have a hint of sin in it, be apart of our experience as husband and wife.

If it ain't tight...it ain't right:lol:

I'm just sharing how my life is with God in a Godly marriage and what the Holy Spirit has spoken to my heart about this thing. We are not perfect and we still work on our marriage in many areas, but in this area...we are good to go :look:!

People will still have to hear from the Holy Spirit concerning this area of their lives.

I've talked long enough....thanks for reading:yep:

N&W
 

Nice & Wavy

Well-Known Member
Thanks, Laela. Maybe oral sex is something that I will be convicted against (assuming it truly is a sin) once I get married. Right now, I'm just thinking hypothetically, as I am still single.

When I think about my future husband, I want to show my love to his entire body. My mouth is made for "speaking and eating food", but I presume it okay to kiss his lips with my mouth. Then to kiss his shoulder. Then to kiss his chest and arms. I'll stop here before I get too graphic, but hopefully, you get where I'm going.

I agree, it's possible for a married couple to defile the bed, but I feel like those methods of defiling were pointed out in Hebrews 13:4 (adultery and immorality). I guess where I am not meeting others is whether oral sex counts as an "immorality".

I think, for now, I'll just wait until marriage and pray about it when the time comes. I may be getting too ahead of myself right now.
I appreciate that you are open to hear from the Lord concerning these matters before you get married. I'm grateful that I had 2 people who spoke to my husband and I before we did and really shared with us the success for a Godly marriage is in obedience....it truly is better than sacrifice!
 

Nice & Wavy

Well-Known Member
I would also like to say that.....

It's interesting to see that there are over 13,000 views for this thread.:lol:

Some people are reeeaaaaaddddding!!!!

:lol:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
In the beginning.....

#1 - God made man in His image and after His likeness.

#2 - God made man and woman to be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth.


#3 - And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bore Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.



In the beginning....powerful words.

If we are made in God's image and after His likeness, we must ask ourselves these questions:

"Would God approve of what I am doing in the marriage bed with my husband, knowing that its the same thing that homosexuals and lesbians do in an defiled bed?"

"Should I engage in the same acts knowing that God considers it an abomination?"


"Is my temple a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God...which is my reasonable service?"


I believe that the Holy Spirit gives us unctions in our spirit that lets us know what the Lord is pleased with and what He isn't pleased with. I think we become so accustomed to what we think is right, rather than knowing what is right, that we don't hear when He is speaking truth to us. So....we search the scriptures, which is what we are suppose to do. But, when we can't find it in the scriptures, then we think to ourselves "well, if its not in the Word then it must be ok."

Many things that the Holy Spirit reveals to us may not actually be written in the scriptures because, if all the things that Jesus taught/said was written...the books would be too many to number. Now, most of us were not virgins when we got with our husbands. What we did in other relationships in the bedroom, we brought into our Godly marriages. [No matter how you feel about Juanita Bynum, ya'll got to remember "No More Sheets." God used that woman to share about the defiled bed like no other] Just because we are married, doesn't mean we can do whatever we want in the bedroom. Oral sex came from other people and places. Think about it...do you think that in the beginning....when there was no sin... that there was oral sex going on between Adam and Eve? Before the fall....there was no need for that. What God gave to them was more than enough. After the fall...sin came in and we are dealing with sin in our lives today.

We must not take the scripture out of context. (Marriage bed undefiled)

The bible says that "Adam KNEW his wife...." we don't need for anyone to tell us what that means....He knew his wife so that they could have children and build upon the foundation that the Lord has set for us as humans. The Lord made it beautiful for Adam and Eve to make love...God, Our Father, is the ultimate love generator....no one can do it like He can!!! We must remember that He is and always will be perfect and there is no sin in Him! God doesn't make mistakes!!!! (note: I'm too old to have more children now...but, my husband KNOWS me:eyebrows2 :Blush2: :kiss2: :cupid: :giggle:

We must be in position to hear from the Holy Spirit. He has let me and my husband know that its wrong (oral sex)from the very beginning of our relationship and I'm grateful that we listened to Him because I can truly say that our marriage is 14 years strong and still going and our bed is definitely undefiled because we CHOOSE not to allow anything that may even have a hint of sin in it, be apart of our experience as husband and wife.

If it ain't tight...it ain't right:lol:

I'm just sharing how my life is with God in a Godly marriage and what the Holy Spirit has spoken to my heart about this thing. We are not perfect and we still work on our marriage in many areas, but in this area...we are good to go :look:!

People will still have to hear from the Holy Spirit concerning this area of their lives.

I've talked long enough....thanks for reading:yep:

N&W

You have a beautiful Ministry and Marriage. :love3:
 

Nice & Wavy

Well-Known Member
@Nice_&_Wavy

This 25 year old, single, virgin, still praying for a husband (and has been every night since she was 15 and told the Lord she desired to be a wife at 8) thanks you for your excellent post.

I will be saving it for future conversations with other young women if/when this topic comes up.
Amen, sis...amen!

The Lord will give you the desires of your heart....He will never fail you!

I appreciate you reading it and receiving from it. Please do share it!!!

Love you!

:love3:
 

delitefulmane

Well-Known Member
If we are made in God's image and after His likeness, we must ask ourselves these questions:

"Would God approve of what I am doing in the marriage bed with my husband, knowing that its the same thing that homosexuals and lesbians do in an defiled bed?"

"Should I engage in the same acts knowing that God considers it an abomination?"


"Is my temple a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God...which is my reasonable service?"


I believe that the Holy Spirit gives us unctions in our spirit that lets us know what the Lord is pleased with and what He isn't pleased with. I think we become so accustomed to what we think is right, rather than knowing what is right, that we don't hear when He is speaking truth to us. So....we search the scriptures, which is what we are suppose to do. But, when we can't find it in the scriptures, then we think to ourselves "well, if its not in the Word then it must be ok."

Many things that the Holy Spirit reveals to us may not actually be written in the scriptures because, if all the things that Jesus taught/said was written...the books would be too many to number.

N&W

Nice & Wavy, I have never heard the topic of oral sex from this point of view. I have always thought that in marriage there was definitely an "anything goes attitude."

"Would God approve of what I am doing in the marriage bed with my husband, knowing that its the same thing that homosexuals and lesbians do in an defiled bed?" <--------This is such a good question to ask in marriage. I am not married but this is a question that I have been pondering over. Thank you for this post and this message. :hug2:

:flowers:
 

Nice & Wavy

Well-Known Member
@Nice & Wavy, I have never heard the topic of oral sex from this point of view. I have always thought that in marriage there was definitely an "anything goes attitude."

"Would God approve of what I am doing in the marriage bed with my husband, knowing that its the same thing that homosexuals and lesbians do in an defiled bed?" <--------This is such a good question to ask in marriage. I am not married but this is a question that I have been pondering over. Thank you for this post and this message. :hug2:

:flowers:
You are more than welcome :love3:
 

Shimmie

"God is the Only Truth -- Period"
Staff member
I would also like to say that.....

It's interesting to see that there are over 13,000 views for this thread.:lol:

Some people are reeeaaaaaddddding!!!!

:lol:

Nice & Wavy....

It's been resurrected approximately three (3) years since and the views have increased by 9505 views. :lol:
 
Top