How to soften hair..type 4a 4b

leovirgo

New Member
I feel your pain. I'm a 4a, and it's the hardest thing trying to get my hair soft once it dries :ohwell:. I have found that my hair doesn't like too many products. I found this out when I used Sta Sof Fro and Infusium leave in. Hot A$$ mess :lachen:!! But, I washed it all out, conditioned with Garnier Fructis Moisture Works, then I did an oil rinse with African Pride (or one of those oils) then conditioned again with Garnier Fructis Moisture. It was very soft and is still soft at this moment, 16 hours later. Oh, I forgot to add that I applied Cantu Shea Butter Leave in to style it. Try it!
 

shocol

Member
The first time I went natural, I spent hundreds of dollars on products to soften my hair. I learned that like my relaxed hair, natural hair doesn't like most oils and butters, especially on wet hair. They usually make my hair hard and greasy. Only a couple of things worked for me.

Pre-poo
Castor oil - Could have other things in it, but it has to be mostly castor oil

Wet hair
Olive and Shea Soap by Chagrin Valley - I can wash with this and not have to apply products after if I don't want to and my hair will dry soft.

Moisturize with Giovianni Direct Leave In and seal with castor oil.

Dry hair
Avocado Oil - Makes hair silky but doesn't really soften for me.
Avocado Butter - Really softens, but heavy and greasy for my thick hair.
Castor Oil - Works like a charm, but can be heavy.
Hairveda CoCasta Oil - Works great to soften, castor oil is one of the main ingredients.
Oyin Handmade Burnt Sugar Pomade - Great for softening, castor oil is one of the ingredients again.
Ojon Restorative Treatment - Great for softening but expensive. However you don't need to use much.

HTH
 

Rei

New Member
You've brought up a very intriguing topic...

Currently I'm a natural 4b and when my hair is wet its a poof with some ringlets on the end (Cloud of Naps as they call it.) I have wanted to embrace my natural hair but I just cannot. Its sooooo hard when it dries. Last weekend, I washed and i put conditioner (Aussie Moist) in my hair...all through it and i pulled it back and kept the conditioner in all day thinking my hair would be so soft when it dried...NOT! IT WAS STILL SO DRY and hard. Let's not even talk about my attempt at a braid out. I ended up with hair like straw from a broom after it was over.

However, when I straighten my hair it feels soft to me. So I conclude that the kinks/curls/coils whatever they are called just feel rougher on the fingers but in actuality they are not dry or hard because when straightened it feels better.

I use Chi Silk Infusion...generously...i squirt it in on a saucer and i dip my fingers in it and apply it to every section as I flat iron. Could it be that the silicone in CSI is masking the roughness? I think I read a post where silicone can do that.

But back to your question. I think that protein is 10% of my problem and moisture is 90% of it. Maybe you should experiment with more Deep Conditioners and find the DC that works best for you. Have you been able to identify if you have problem breakage or shedding?

Also, when I used EVOO my hair felt very hard.

Aussie Moist 3 min miracle and hci silk infusion makes my hair hard as a rock. Even Aussie Moist the normal condi is great but I mainly use it as a detangling condi not really as my main moisturizing one.

Try Aubrey HSR on dry hair with heat for 45 mins, rinse it out, then put a little more back in your hair as a leavein, braid it, and rub it all over with castor oil. Then go to sleep, and when you wake up your hair shouldn't be hard anymore! Thats what I do when my hair feels hard (except I use sheabutter, but you said you weren't interested in that). And you need to continue this like every week, no slackin! (I agree with also taking your omega supplements if you don't eat right. I am usually very dehydrated, and taking flaxseed oil helps along with drinking a lot of water.)
hard hair=not enough moisture. It may take some time to find the products right for you but one you do, hard hair will be history.

(Unless you have hard water, then maybe one of the other ladies can chime in on help with that)
 

KizzieNapps

New Member
I found that glycerin helped to keep my hair soft. And also like Nonie said when I started just using water on my hair and leaving all the leave-ins out (except my cantu shea butter) my hair is uber-soft. No glycerine needed. You should probably just try clarifying and then try one product at a time for a while to see what helps/hurts your hair.
 

that_1_grrrl

New Member
^yeah I hear a lot of members here use shea butter but I used to use it on my skin and it doesnt look like it would moisturize my hair just based on the texture and grittiness of it.

Did you melt it first? Once I melted some shea butter and added jojoba oil as a DC, and my hair stayed moist for days.

I really need to buy more.
 

anniev2

New Member
Follow up: because the things i learned in this post gave me courage that I could make my hair soft. :yep:

I was having hard hair issues as I wrote in the post. My hair was hard and it was wiry feeling. It never felt tamed and I wondered how some of the ladies who have these huge fros can manage to pull it into the pony puff because I sure couldn't and they seemed to have more hair than me. It also felt like when wet, when i passed my fingers over my hair like my strands were rubber b/c of the grip that they had.

BUT!!!....I wasn't giving up

I purchased coconut oil, jojoba oil, porosity control, ORS replenishing pak and my natural hair, straightened, feels better than it has ever felt before. It was easier to comb and blow dry and most of all it felt soft.

I am so looking forward to washing my hair again. It was just so much more manageable and easy to do. This was one of the most difficult parts to over come about my natural hair is that it was tough and rough...but not after this.

Hopefully these two pictures give justice to my new sense of happiness with my hair. Not sure why my hair looks two different colors but here it is:: Don't know what part of this new regime helped me out but i'm def moving in the right direction.

 

Duchesse

Well-Known Member
My hair has chronic brillo-straw syndrome....but what has most definitely helped is cowashing and DCing twice a week. After day 3 or so, my hair feels crisp again, so it needs to be wet.

Also moisturizing my hair while damp has been helpful, it feels like it penetrates my strands more. Shea butter on damp hair works wonders for me.
 

georgia80

Well-Known Member
If your hair is hard it's probably dry and you need a good moisturizer. Do you DC your hair. When my hair was dry, I DC'd with steam 3 times a week until I got it under control. Now I only DC with steam once a week.

Smartypants is right on point for 4a and 4b hair! Keep hair routine simple until you know how your hair reacts. Adding moisture first is the key.

1. Clarify
2. Get a Steamer, and Steam, Steam (2-3 times per week) alternating and deep condition with a
3. Moisurizing conditioner such as Aubreys Honeysuckle and a good protein conditioner of choice.
4. Then seal the moisture in with oil of choice.

Stay with this routine until your hair reach the desired moisture level. Your hair will begin to feel like butta.
 

ToyToy

Well-Known Member
I have 4a/4b hair, and my hair is very soft. I agree with what some people have already said, that less is more. I DC every week, and it has made a world of difference. I always make sure my DCs include oils, honey and coconut cream (in addition to my conditioner of choice). Ever since I have been doing this, I discovered that the job's already half done just by DC-ing alone. My moisturizer is very simple: water, shea butter, a carrier oil, glycerine and an emulsifier. It's a little greasy, but I don't need much of it. My hair is soft like butter, very healthy and very happy.
Also, maybe try something with glycerine or sorbitol high up in the ingredient list. My hair loves these ingredients, and who knows - your hair might too :).
 

Nonie

Well-Known Member
I am so looking forward to washing my hair again. It was just so much more manageable and easy to do. This was one of the most difficult parts to over come about my natural hair is that it was tough and rough...but not after this.

Hopefully these two pictures give justice to my new sense of happiness with my hair. Not sure why my hair looks two different colors but here it is:: Don't know what part of this new regime helped me out but i'm def moving in the right direction.


That's wonderful that you're feeling better about dealing with your hair. It looks very nice and soft (Is it?). The press looks very pretty. Love the bling!
 

Neith

New Member
My hair will never be soft.

No matter how much conditioning... it's going to feel coarse to the touch.

That is my texture.

If your hair is in good condition and you DC and moisturize it regularly, then that just may be your texture.

Everyones hair isn't soft. Regardless of curl pattern.

Some people even say my hair LOOKS soft and healthy, but no one has ever said it FEELS soft. Coarse does not mean unhealthy.

Just my perspective :)
 
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