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Posted 02-22-2010 at 10:28 AM by jupitermoon

I have been an RN for almost two years now. I'm so thankful that I have a job and I enjoy taking care of others but dealing with my co workers can be quite a challenge at times. Today, I had to give report to a nurse that I find totally intimidating and he nit picked and took out his frustrations on me. A little over a year ago while I was still in orientation (and had just graduated and passed my boards) I gave him report and he didn't like it. He started throwing things and started laughing at me. Ever since then, I've been afraid of him. I've been dreading this day when I would have to give report to him again.

People have told me that my reports are good, and no one ever complains about my reports, but I just can't get it right with this particular nurse. I'll forever appear stupid to him and I wish I didn't care so much what others think of me. My inadequacies are really showing. At this point I don't even want to go back to work again.
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Comments

  1. New Comment
    Chaosbutterfly's Avatar
    Omg...can't you report him to someone?
    That has to be a form of misconduct...he can't just treat you like crap forever because you made a mistake when you were brand new.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 10:53 AM by Chaosbutterfly Chaosbutterfly is offline
  2. New Comment
    Sounds like he's the one with issues not you! Just remember that when you start to talk with him. He's no better than you and he has had his moments of uncertainty as well. You just weren't there to witness them.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 11:17 AM by magviv magviv is offline
  3. New Comment
    [QUOTE=Chaosbutterfly;bt93864]Omg...can't you report him to someone?
    That has to be a form of misconduct...he can't just treat you like crap forever because you made a mistake when you were brand new.[/QUOTE]

    Thank you for responding. I've told on him once but... I think I may just try to find a new job. This job is really taking a toll on me and I don't see anything good coming out of this. Just thinking about going back to work is giving me a panic attack.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 11:33 AM by jupitermoon jupitermoon is offline
  4. New Comment
    [QUOTE=magviv;bt93866]Sounds like he's the one with issues not you! Just remember that when you start to talk with him. He's no better than you and he has had his moments of uncertainty as well. You just weren't there to witness them.[/QUOTE]

    Thank you. I will keep that in mind.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 11:34 AM by jupitermoon jupitermoon is offline
  5. New Comment
    If you know that what you are doing is right I wouldn't pay that guy anymore attention if he doesn't like how you do it SO WHAT! Its ur way of doing it! Do ur best and as long as u are there shouldn't be anyone that can make u feel like u are stupid or anything else. I used to work with a guy like that and found out later that he actually liked me:nono: Some people thrive on making others feel less than them again just do ur best and try not to pay these folks any mind!
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 12:00 PM by LUVBEEINHISHONEY LUVBEEINHISHONEY is offline
  6. New Comment
    [QUOTE=LUVBEEINHISHONEY;bt93886]If you know that what you are doing is right I wouldn't pay that guy anymore attention if he doesn't like how you do it SO WHAT! Its ur way of doing it! Do ur best and as long as u are there shouldn't be anyone that can make u feel like u are stupid or anything else. I used to work with a guy like that and found out later that he actually liked me:nono: Some people thrive on making others feel less than them again just do ur best and try not to pay these folks any mind![/QUOTE]

    So true...I've seen people like that.:nono:
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 12:10 PM by MrJohnsonsRib MrJohnsonsRib is offline
  7. New Comment
    FlowerHair's Avatar
    Even if you're afraid, never show it. He's obviously a bully. Don't let him get to you.
    Stay strong and confident.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 12:22 PM by FlowerHair FlowerHair is offline
  8. New Comment
    It's so easy for those of us who aren't facing this to be like "I would have bawled him out!" But really, it is much harder when you are the one standing before a professional "superior" and it feels as if they have absolute power over you.

    I know exactly what you're going through.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 01:26 PM by YankeeCandle YankeeCandle is offline
  9. New Comment
    Have confidence in you and try to find a way to work it out. Don't let this fool run you off your job. Is there someone you know in the same line of work that can give you some advice.
    It sounds like you need to pray and/or say some affirmations before you go to work everyday, maybe all day.
    You can start looking for something else now, but who knows, you may have to face this same situation again. If you can get more money, better perks, better environment, then go ahead and make a move. But it sounds like the work is fine but the coworkers are this guy are off the chain.
    One thing I'm working on is trying to have peace within me in spite of _______________ It sounds like this is something you could work on too.
    You also need a little more self-confidence. If you did not know what you were doing they never would have hired you and even if you had slipped by then would have let you go. This dude is off the chain. It has nothing to do with your performance. Maybe you could keep detailed notes of your interactions with him and find out how to report him. That would have some impact even if you do decide to roll out. If he is doing this mess to you, he is/will do this to someone else.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 02:23 PM by shenitab shenitab is offline
  10. New Comment
    I'm not an Rn yet but hon if you dot deal with it he wins. He may be f@@@ing with you on purpose. Sadistic. You can't please everyone and as long as you know you do your job and give all the info he needs in report then screw him if he's not satisfied. Pray for him
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 03:26 PM by Nubenap22 Nubenap22 is offline
  11. New Comment
    If it is just him, ignore him to the best of your ability. Give your report to him and keep it moving. If there is any validity in his criticism use it constructively and improve any weak areas.

    However, a panic attack at going back to work sounds like it may be more than just him causing problems. If the job is toxic, and you can find a better environment then take your time and look around for a better position. Then quit on your own terms.

    Wishing you the best.
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 04:32 PM by Rain20 Rain20 is offline
  12. New Comment
    Don't let this SOB make you feel stupid. It may just be his insecurities... I'm almost a RN(one semester left) and I know how some people can be in the hospital setting. Keep your head up high, when ever you run into this guy, don't give him the satisfaction! Hope things turn out better for you in the future!
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 05:59 PM by MizzCoco MizzCoco is offline
  13. New Comment
    Rocky91's Avatar
    i agree with FlowerHair-you have to exude confidence, even if you don't feel it.
    my mother's been an RN for almost 20 years, and she's actually become one of the people who new nurses are intimidated by-even though she's really sweet.
    it's all about giving off a vibe that you KNOW what you're doing, and he can't scare you.
    good luck!!
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 07:16 PM by Rocky91 Rocky91 is online now
  14. New Comment
    Eiano's Avatar
    Hey chica.

    As long as you give the most important info, that's all that matters. What I try and do is write down little things that happen that are vital to know so that when it's time to give report, I don't forget. Another thing that may help you is writing tiny notes throughout the day in the chart. It helps to keep things fresh in your mind.

    Sorry you're going through this, but I'm thinking you'll find this type of nurse everywhere you go... I know I have a couple of nurses like this on my unit, but I do what I do and leave with my mind clear cause I know I did a damn good job. Nursing is 24 hours. If he doesn't want to do his job, then that's his problem, not yours!! *hug*
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 08:38 PM by Eiano Eiano is offline
  15. New Comment
    He sounds crazy - therefore, you are not the one with the problem. I'm all for moving on to better places, but if you like your job except for this one douchebag, then report him [B]again[/B]. Is he black or white? gay or straight? how old? American or foreign?
    Posted 02-22-2010 at 11:16 PM by Optimus_Prime Optimus_Prime is offline
  16. New Comment
    Thank you for all of the responses and support ladies. They are GREATLY appreciated. I agree that is it important to have confidence. I'm disappointed with myself for becoming nervous and almost falling apart during report and will try not to let it happen again.
    Posted 02-23-2010 at 12:52 AM by jupitermoon jupitermoon is offline
  17. New Comment
    [QUOTE=Rain20;bt93948]If it is just him, ignore him to the best of your ability. Give your report to him and keep it moving. [B]If there is any validity in his criticism use it constructively and improve any weak areas.[/B]

    [B]However, a panic attack at going back to work sounds like it may be more than just him causing problems.[/B] If the job is toxic, and you can find a better environment then take your time and look around for a better position. Then quit on your own terms.

    Wishing you the best.[/QUOTE]

    I will cross my "t"s and dot my "i"s more. Every little mistake will be magnified with this person.

    As much as I love taking care of others, there are many aspects of my job outside of patient care that do bother me---most having to do with workplace politics. Like some of the other ladies have mentioned, quitting my job for this reason may not be the best choice because I am bound to run into the same problems elsewhere. I just have to face them. Also, if I quit my job, I will miss taking care of my patients; I really enjoy helping people feel better.

    I'm still afraid to go back to work tomorrow, but will do so. I am also seriously considering taking anti-anxiety meds. I really need to calm down. Just thinking about report yesterday is still making me tearful.
    Posted 02-23-2010 at 01:04 AM by jupitermoon jupitermoon is offline
  18. New Comment
    [QUOTE=Optimus_Prime;bt94094]He sounds crazy - therefore, you are not the one with the problem. I'm all for moving on to better places, but if you like your job except for this one douchebag, then report him [B]again[/B]. [B]Is he black or white? gay or straight? how old? American or foreign[/B]?[/QUOTE]

    He's Asian and he's straight, even though he is known for having his "feminine moments" (he throws things and give people the middle finger when he becomes upset). He's also foreign but has been here in the US for like seven years. He is known for throwing tantrums and intimidating others on the job.
    Posted 02-23-2010 at 01:08 AM by jupitermoon jupitermoon is offline
 


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